Tuesday, July 04, 2006
The Rockets' Red Glare
I love costume dramas, and I don’t mean common ones like Pride and Prejudice or Tom Jones. I like hard-core porn costume dramas. Private’s Gladiator and Goya, Rocco Sifreddi’s Immortal, and gay classics like Centurions of Rome get me off in no time at all. I think it’s very hot to see lavish, well designed and build period costumes lifted, ripped and shed allowing us to view historical characters sucking and fucking. It always kind of throws me when, in gay porn, condoms suddenly appear on hard cocks. I understand there are safety issues, but I would be truly surprised if Nero or Billy the Kid really used rubbers.
Today being Independence Day here in the US, I got thinking about the porn films I’ve seen dealing the birth of our great country. I thought about it a lot. A lot. And I didn’t come up with anything. Not anything, not one video. I can not recall seeing George Washington or Thomas Jefferson or Aaron Burr or even King George III getting a blow job from a private in the Continental Army, or, wig askew, fucking Betsy Ross up the ass-hole with their fully erect and pre-cum dripping flag-pole.
There is one scene, kind of. In the 1981 straight classic Pandora’s Mirror, the great Veronica Hart finds an amazing mirror in an antique store and decides she must have it. The owner won't sell, claiming it's possessed. Finally, he allows her to "borrow" it for a few days. When she gets it home, she stares into the mirror and witnesses a variety of costumed sex scenes throughout many different periods. The very hot cast includes Kandi Barbour, Merle Michaels, a very young, very muscular Jerry Butler, George Payne, Tiffany Clark, Jamie Gillis, Annie Sprinkle, Carter Stevens, Hillary Summers and Marlene Willoughby.
One of the scenes Ms Hart watches in the mirror takes place during the war for Independence. A busty young slave is in the barn feeding the chickens when three very sexy, very handsome Red Coats (played by actors I don’t recognize) arrive, grabbing the beautiful young woman and fucking her, forcing their cocks into her waiting mouth, culminating in a terrific cum splattered gang-bang. The scene takes place in the correct decade, but it really doesn’t have anything to do with The Declaration of Independence or The Bill of Rights. Close, but no cigar.
Do the absence of Revolutionary War porn films indicate there is no audience for stroking material set in this period? Or have these figures, our fore-fathers from history, become so idealized, so worshiped, so God-like that adult producers are afraid to make them sexual beings? I don’t know, but I think a porn movie about the birth of America could be quite entertaining, not to mention really hot and sexy. I’ll keep waiting, but I have a feeling I’ll still be waiting quite a few Fourth of Julys from now.
Today being Independence Day here in the US, I got thinking about the porn films I’ve seen dealing the birth of our great country. I thought about it a lot. A lot. And I didn’t come up with anything. Not anything, not one video. I can not recall seeing George Washington or Thomas Jefferson or Aaron Burr or even King George III getting a blow job from a private in the Continental Army, or, wig askew, fucking Betsy Ross up the ass-hole with their fully erect and pre-cum dripping flag-pole.
There is one scene, kind of. In the 1981 straight classic Pandora’s Mirror, the great Veronica Hart finds an amazing mirror in an antique store and decides she must have it. The owner won't sell, claiming it's possessed. Finally, he allows her to "borrow" it for a few days. When she gets it home, she stares into the mirror and witnesses a variety of costumed sex scenes throughout many different periods. The very hot cast includes Kandi Barbour, Merle Michaels, a very young, very muscular Jerry Butler, George Payne, Tiffany Clark, Jamie Gillis, Annie Sprinkle, Carter Stevens, Hillary Summers and Marlene Willoughby.
One of the scenes Ms Hart watches in the mirror takes place during the war for Independence. A busty young slave is in the barn feeding the chickens when three very sexy, very handsome Red Coats (played by actors I don’t recognize) arrive, grabbing the beautiful young woman and fucking her, forcing their cocks into her waiting mouth, culminating in a terrific cum splattered gang-bang. The scene takes place in the correct decade, but it really doesn’t have anything to do with The Declaration of Independence or The Bill of Rights. Close, but no cigar.
Do the absence of Revolutionary War porn films indicate there is no audience for stroking material set in this period? Or have these figures, our fore-fathers from history, become so idealized, so worshiped, so God-like that adult producers are afraid to make them sexual beings? I don’t know, but I think a porn movie about the birth of America could be quite entertaining, not to mention really hot and sexy. I’ll keep waiting, but I have a feeling I’ll still be waiting quite a few Fourth of Julys from now.
