Porn Watcher

Young, Dumb And Full Of Cum

2006-11-17T22:16:00.000-08:00

Here’s another of our growing list of celebritys who've inexplicably posed nude early in their careers.

Not from an early exploitation film, no, nor a less conservative European feature film, young Antonio Banderas posed nude for a photographer who cleverly held onto the negative. Needless to say, when Mr. Banderas became famous, the photog released this picture over the net.

Porn Watcher’s question: Why did Mr. Melanie Griffith pose for a shot that is obviously not intended as an artistic statement. It is of a hot young man standing naked and letting a (presumably) older man snap a few quick stills. Well, well, well, Antonio, what else have you done with older men when you were young, not as savvy, and strapped for cash?

But he was very hot. And it’s a nice cock.

RIP Jon Dough

2006-11-12T16:22:00.000-08:00

I’ve complained more than a few times on this blog about male porn performers who over-stay their welcome by working in front of the camera after their looks (and occasionally, their hard-ons) have gone. One who worked for over 20 years and still looked great was the hirsute and horny Jon Dough.

I vividly remember the first film in which I saw Dough fuck. I’m sorry to say I don’t recall the title, but he played a guy who’s girlfriend wasn’t very responsive in the sack and so he searched for sexual fulfillment by cheating on her. It was a comedy, and Dough struck me as being very funny, a pretty good actor, sporting a large, hairy prick, and as being sexy as all fuck!

I looked for his films often after that, and, happily, found them regularly. In his 20 year career he acted in over 1000 skin flicks, and directed another 70 or so, most recently for major studios like Anabolic, VCA Excessive, NJ Films, and Hustler. When he began to produce and direct he was one of the pioneers of the gonzo style of porn, an innovation many would copy and more would steal from.

Dough had his own company, Jon Dough Productions, for which he produced his gonzo product. He also owned the Doughboy Video line featuring “oral only” titles. He was renowned in the adult industry for possessing one of the most reliably stiff cocks, but, more importantly, his sense of humor shone through; in Anabolic's Ass Creampies he directed each of the girls to get a plate of whipped cream in the face after the scene.

I’ll always remember ten years ago or so, walking into an adult boutique with one of my porning friends. One of Dough’s films was playing on the television. “Oh, look,” I said, “That’s Jon Dough, one of my new favorites.” “Wow!” my porn buddy responded, “Does he ever do gay flicks?” “No, just straight,’ I told him. He looked at the screen for a moment and said, “What a waste.” I didn’t think it was a waste at all.

It was, tragically, wasted a month ago when Dough, who’s real name was Chet Anuszek, committed suicide in Chatsworth, California, at the age of 43. Dough leaves behind a wife of 12 years, Monique Demoan, as well as a four-year-old daughter. The reason for his suicide has not been given, and maybe no one will ever know why he did it. It always saddens me when an adult performer scrags themselves. It makes the industry look tawdry and immoral. I honestly don’t think more porn stars kill-themselves than, say, mainstream performers. I just think that when they do it receives a great deal more press coverage.

Let’s face it, even in tragedy and death, sex sells.

Wank Tube

2006-11-06T00:27:00.000-08:00

Occasionally life drops something onto your lap that so completely changes your world, so completely creates a new reality, makes you so completely ecstatic that you can scarcely stop yourself from jumping up and down, or running through your neighborhood naked, shouting out your joy. Okay, maybe that’s taking it a little far. But sometimes things come along that do make you very happy, just when you least expect it.

I’ve recently discovered two wonderful new websites; Xtube (at http://www.xtube.com/index.php) and Porno Tube (at http://www.pornotube.com/index.php.) These sites are to porn connoisseurs like you and me what You Tube is to folks who enjoy funny and endearing videos. Xtube and Porno Tube are free sites for people to upload adult flicks and pics for others to watch. Of the two sites, I prefer the convenience and ease of navigation of Porno Tube, but I’ve talked with friends who tell me they tend to go with Xtube. You should check out both, as they each have their own unique pluses and minuses. See what you think, and let me know which hooked you in more deeply.

Both feature short scenes from professionally produced porn, both gay and straight. You can search by subject or fetish, and find just about anything you might be into at the moment. You’ll find endless pages of most anything that’s going to get you off.

But my favorite thing are the amateurs posts. Hundreds of men and women have taken pictures and video of themselves alone and with others; masturbating, sucking, fucking, eating cum, and doing almost anything you imagine. It’s extraordinarily hot, and seeing folks who easily could live next door to any of us in their most intimate moments is a major turn-on. I love these photos and clips, and can (and have) spend an entire evening beating-off just to these. Unbelievably hot.

It doesn’t hurt, of course, that while surfing Xtube this past weekend, I unexpectedly came across a friend’s video and pictures. He’s a young chum I’ve always found sexy, and, as he lives in another state (in fact, another coast) I almost never get to see him these days. I’ve also never met his new boyfriend. However, as of Friday night, I’ve seen pictures and video of his new boyfriend. There are shots of the two of them fucking and sucking, and a short video of the boyfriend pulling one off and shooting a huge load of man-jizz covering his six-pack. The boyfriend is hung -- really hung -- and my friend, whom I’ve never seen naked in life, is even hunkier than I’d imagined. Needless to say, I’ve gotten off to that page several times already, and it’s only been forty-eight hours since I came across it.

Now the question is, should I tell my buddy I’ve seen his home-made porn? What do you think? I’m not sure yet, but I’m tending to wonder if I shouldn’t keep it my little secret. I’m just worried next time I run into him I may start giggling. And when I officially meet the hung boyfriend, I may start drooling. Or running through the neighborhood naked, shouting out my joy.

Continental Jerking

2006-11-05T19:00:00.000-08:00

When watching straight porn, I always hope for a gang-bang or large orgy scene. I love them! I live to see a group of straight young men, hot, muscular, sweaty and horned up, standing around together, stroking their cocks, each waiting their turn to fuck some lucky cunt. There is nothing else that turns me on as much as that does. I almost get off as fast watching the studs waiting to fuck as I do seeing them going at it. I think it’s just great.

There are several American porn companies that produce gang-bang films, but the truth of the matter is I find the European films much hotter. And, by the way, I find the European men who participate in these sex sequences much hotter than their US counterparts. As I’ve written in the past, the Euro-Studs are more comfortable naked and hard around each other, and they just seem more turned on and excited. It may just be good editing, but you never see them without a fully erect dick. You can’t say that for the American flicks.

I think the best of the European production companies is Private. The films are well directed, stunningly well photographed, the sex is awesome, there are few (if any) girl-on-girl scenes (or if there are, a guy is always present and participating), the guys almost always shoot their sticky jizz on the women’s face and/or mouth, and there are tons of gang-bangs and group sex sequences.

I always know a Private film is going to provide me with a great masturbation experience. If you don’t know their films, check one out. You won’t be disappointed.

Tattoo? Tat No!

2006-11-04T17:01:00.000-08:00

I don’t have any tattoos on any part of my body, and frankly, I don’t want any. There is no image I can think of -- no secret Chinese vowel, no animal I identify with, no skull with anything emerging from the eye socket, not even mom’s name -- that I can be sure I’m going to want to still have on my arm or chest or ass or leg forty years from now. Seriously. I don’t even want Porn Watcher inked into an entire arm sleeve. I can do without, thanks.

I also don’t find tattoos very attractive or sexy on other people. If someone has a small discreet tattoo on their ankle, that’s fine, but when I’m jacking-off to a porn flick and a guy (or more and more a woman) appears covered in ink, well, that's a complete turn-off for me. It’s hard to fantasize about someone, to put them into your own secret scenario, when they have the words Sara’s Bitch (or whatever) spelled across their lower back.

With that in mind, I was web-porning the other evening and came across these pictures of this guy. Look at him, a hot, hung guy, very whackable. Except for just one thing.

Now let’s think about this for just a moment. Tatting yourself is one thing -- but come on! -- There???? I mean, who would want to suck on that inked cock? And of course, you have to wonder what it must have been like to have the tattoo done. Did he have to be hard while the tat artist was working on it? If so, just how long did it take to have it done? Get it hard, prick the prick with the ink pen for a few seconds, softness occurs, get it hard again, another couple seconds of inking, softness. It must have taken weeks!

So, if you meet me for sex some time, don’t expect a lot of tats on your pal Axel. And I won’t expect any on you.

A Vampire Who Really Sucks

2006-11-01T19:30:00.000-08:00

My favorite holiday is Halloween. I think I enjoy it so much because there’s something vaguely sexual about the celebration. I mean, we all disguise our true identities to become people (or things) we really aren’t. That gives us permission to dare to do things we usually wouldn’t. Not unlike the internet.

And so, to celebrate Halloween, I pulled out my worn VHS copy of 1985’s Gayracula. Sexy, funny, nasty and full of terrific sex, Gayracula is gay porn paradise. The unrelenting carnality, which, thanks to the stunningly hot men in the cast and their sexual enthusiasm, easily catapults this film into the classic category.

And it really is a film. This may be the last great shot-on-celluloid feature of the 80s before video made pornographic filmmaking a thing of the past. Filmed in expensive-to-obtain Eastman Color, the story opens with a lingering shot of dark robed monks carrying a coffin to a cave where they plan to flip its lid and drive a stake through the heart of the sleeping vampire within. But when the vampire-killers open the sepulcher, the bloodsucker transforms into a bat and flies to a nearby mountaintop (which looks suspiciously like the Hollywood Hills) where he materializes into the naked and jaw-droppingly gorgeous Tim Kramer, who bares both his fake fangs and very real cock as the titles roll! By now you’ll know you’re in high camp territory, with the creaky, Dark Shadows style sets and second-hand costume shop wardrobe, but those elements only add to the atmosphere, which is drenched in some white-hot and decidedly unsafe sex. With Gayracula, superstar Tim Kramer turned in his signature performance, and his lovely face, taut, smooth torso, and amazingly beautiful and large dick are the erotic centerpieces of the film.

In the first sex scene, Tim-as-bat flies to a nearby castle, where he enjoys a face-fuck and dick-suck with the very sexy Steve Collins. Filmed on a set with what looks like yards of satin casket liner under the performers, Tim fucks Collins like a machine, working up a drippy sweat as he snarls and shows off his fake plastic fangs and stunning ass.

Flash forward 200 years to Southern California. At a tacky apartment complex, one very tired looking Michael Christopher plays a muscled up Renfield who has an appetite for more than bugs. Once our vampire hero is safely inside, Christopher engages in a little (cock) suck fest with a bearded stud who jacks himself off while Big Mike sinks his fat tool into his hairy ass. What follows is a vintage pre-condom fuck scene, with these long and lean boys working up a sheen of sweet sweat, all captured by director Roger Earl’s very dynamic camera which moves down on and around the action, at points even going up overhead for some astonishing shots before Christopher unloads spurt after spurt of cum which is then replayed in all its slow-motion glory.

Tim rises out of his coffin for the next scene, whereupon he’s offered some of the bearded guy's ass, which he rebuffs with a curt, “Yeah but I don’t like sloppy seconds!” The action moves to a strip club next, where Gayracula watches a bit of the show before deciding to check out the action in the back room. Shedding his clothes, he joins an awesome orgy in progress between a trio of guys. Tim hooks up with a bushy haired, mustached dude for some face fucking. One can’t help but realize how Kramer pointed the way for what would become the ideal of male beauty in the 90s – pretty faced, buff, smooth straight haired boys.

After biting his partner on the neck, Gayracula de-materializes, then re-forms in the club where he witnesses another three-way which unfolds on the stage to some (hilarious) disco music, with the players in (equally hilarious) Mardi Gras masks! Over the top and firmly tongue-in-cheek, the scene is too good. After working out their messy cum-shots, Tim watches a slightly boring solo from a Latino dancer who periodically squirts metal rings out of his asshole much to Tim’s delight. Suddenly a very blond dancer appears and gets barebacked on the floor after lots of ass fingering.

Back at home beside his coffin, Tim arranges his own three-way with two hunks. After dumping the cream of the un-dead on a very hairy chest, Tim, in a very campy scene, draws a young valet to himself utilizing the “power of his mind” -- but not for blood -- for hot, sloppy, dripping cock! Some terrific dick-sucking and open asshole shots follow, with Tim on top during the 69 and some choice close-up ass fingering of the valet. Raw ass-fucking follows, with Tim brutally pounding the hot bubble-butt.

The plot thickens the next night when, upon waking to the strains of a Hollywood soundtrack worthy of Franz Waxman, Gayracula realizes he’s fallen in love with the valet. But first, the thirst! A quick trip to the Burbank blood bank is in order, and Kramer actually sucks blood from a bag before things turn very nasty between a donor and Uber Hunk Doug Weston on an exam table. The burly Weston gets sucked and fingers hairy ass, then pounds butt while a lust-crazed Kramer watches from the sidelines and hisses like a mad cat displaying his plastic fangs!

Finally, Gayracula reunites with his youthful valet, who begs to be given the dark gift of eternal life. And so, the couple bathes in a fountain in a gorgeously shot sequence, then reclines on a blanket while the sun rises, revealing that love has set Tim free – he’s now impervious to the sunlight! When asked what he’s going to with his newfound mortality he replies – eye-rollingly – “I’m going to work on my tan!!”

Gayracula is a fun and sexy classic porn film. Lots of hot guys and plenty of three-ways and orgy sequences. If you’d like to jack-off to a hot horror flick satire, this is one to check out. I promise, you’ll have a good time!

Here are a few stills from one of the many orgy scenes in Gayracula.

Eat (Some Cake) & Blow (Out The Candles)

2006-10-15T12:16:00.000-07:00

Time flies when you’re watching hot porn! It was one year ago today, October 15th, that I made my first post to this blog. What a geat time I've had with Porn Watcher!

I can’t believe it’s been an entire year. And, looking back at my posts, I can’t believe the diverse array of porn I’ve watched. I’ve seen gay, I’ve seen straight, I’ve seen bi porn. I’ve juggled DVDs, VHS tapes, reading material, and, my new best friend, the internet. I’ve watched stuff produced professionally, and a whole lot of amateur whackers. I’ve watched romantic couples fucking, I’ve watched guys jacking-off solo, I’ve watched huge aggressive orgies. There has been vanilla sex, experimental sex, rough sex, kinky sex, sex I love doing myself, sex I like watching and would love to try, sex I like watching but wouldn’t want to participate in, and sex that was fascinating but not remotely sexy. I think the only kind of sex I haven’t spent much time with in the last year (or that I quickly fast-forwarded through) was girl-on-girl sex. As a gay man, it just isn't anything that turns me on. I need a guy present, know what I mean?

The other thing I noticed looking back on all the posts is just how much I’ve masturbated in the past year. (Keeping in mind, of course, that Porn Watcher only documents a small percentage of my stoke sessions. Truth be told, I pull one off almost every day. Makes you think, huh?) I’ve jacked-off to so much porn that I have to remember one important thing in the coming months: Drink More Water! Jesus, I’ve lost gallons of liquids pounding my dick.

But I think the best thing to come out of Porn Watcher’s first year is the wonderful people I’ve gotten to know through the comments posted by readers and the wonderful email‘s I‘ve received. It’s very exciting to know folks are reading what I’m writing, and that those people have strong opinions and are passionate about the art of porn. That’s very exciting to me. Neither Picasso nor Warhol -- not to mention Van Gogh or Monet (I mean Claude not Bridgette) -- would have been noticed if there hadn’t been a healthy discussion about their works. I feel the same way about adult entertainment. Porn may not be at the level of those great painters, or of Beethoven or Lloyd-Wright or Bergmen. But I believe the potential is there and that that potential is great.

So, Happy Anniversary to all of us! Let’s continue to watch what gets us off, discover new forms of our favorite entertainment, write passionately about porn, ardently discuss our views of it, and most importantly … Drink More Water!

Broke, Straight and Slightly Creepy

2006-10-12T00:24:00.000-07:00

Some porn websites get you hard and get you off. Some are well produced but just aren’t your thing. And some must be hot to someone somewhere, but you may find it disgusting and disquieting. But of all of them I’ve stroked-off to, I’ve never found another porn site like BrokeStraightBoys.com.

The boys are straight, slightly desperate, and right off the street. They aren’t like the guys at sites like SeanCody.com or CorbinFisher.com. Those men are muscular and gorgeous. The Broke Boys generally are not. They are often fine looking, but they don’t have the stunning good looks the studs on the other sites have, that is reminiscent of professional baseball players or Playgirl models (Which, needless to say, are often the same thing.) The Broke Boys are those average guys you see on the street and sometimes think to yourself, “Hummmm, I wonder what he looks like naked and hard.”

Here’s the unique set-up. A broke guy agrees to sit in front of the camera and jack-off (a “paid interview”) auditioning for a straight porn video. They get naked, hard and start stroking. Suddenly there is a knock at the hotel room door. Because of a (premeditated) scheduling snafu, another guy has shown up for his audition. Oh, dear! Well, our unseen director decides why not do both auditions together (He decides this in all the clips, of which there are many.) The second guy strips, sits on the couch next to the first guy, and starts whacking.

Out of nowhere, the director suggests one of the guys should “help your buddy out.” The stud stops dead (every single time) and pleads he is straight. Well, would you do it for another 50 bucks? A pause. “No, we’re straight, dude.” How about another 100 dollars? “Well, okay, that‘ll be fine.”

Pretty soon they’re jacking each other off, and then the director has another idea. To make a long story short, roughly 400 dollars later they’re sucking each other and then (usually) one gets fucked and ends up coated in sticky cum. Oddly, when the sex is over and the guys are panting and sweaty (and still naked), the director asks the boys what they thought of their boy-on-boy experience. Almost to a man they say they enjoyed it.

Honestly, I don’t think these guys are faking it. I think they really are cash-strapped straight guys who will do most anything to pay the rent. If these are actors, then start handing out the Oscars, because they are completely believable without any of the false line readings that even the best porn stars have a tendency to deliver. This is too real. So real it has to be real.

My favorite of the hunks is a hot, blonde muscle boy (rare at this site) who brings his buddy in so they can both make a little extra dough. Yes, the usual scenario is followed, but during the blow-job section, the blonde starts rimming his buddy's firm bubble-butt. The surprised director even asks if they’ve done this kind of thing before. “No, no, dude, we’re straight.” When his friend shoves his very large cut cock up the blonde’s ass-hole it only takes about six strokes before the blonde shoots his copious load all over his own stomach. I have to admit, I just love it.

So, how would I describe my visceral reaction to this website; Love it, Don’t care, or Repulsed by it? Well, I think it’s nasty, unusual and very, very erotic in an odd power-hungry sort of way. But there is always a moment while you’re watching these clips when you think to yourself, “Oh, Jesus, this is just wrong.” My roommate can’t watch these clips at all. He says it makes him feel -- and I quote -- “Eckey and Uhggey.” I’m not sure what that means exactly, but I understand the sentiment.

As a side note, I was surfing really bad TV shows on a recent Saturday afternoon and came across a program called That’s Just Wrong. It’s kind of a Jackass rip-off, but one of the things they did on the show was find early twenty-something guys on the street and offer them $20.00 to kiss another straight guy. And they go for it, although one guy did hold out for $40.00. It made me laugh, but it also made me horny. I had to run right to the computer and have a jack-off session to a couple of those Broke Straight Boys.

And this time I didn’t feel either Eckey or Uhggey.

A Few Stills From Broke Straight Boys

Put A Bow On That

2006-10-09T18:13:00.000-07:00

I’ve often written here about my passion of the hot, muscular straight boys featured at SeanCody.com. I know Mr. Cody used to be a porn star himself, but even so, how he gets these breeder-boys to talk about their sex life, strip, jack-off, cum -- sometimes play with their assholes, sometimes allow a guy to suck them off, sometimes even get fucked -- how he talks them into doing these things I’ll never know. I'm guessing Sean must be capitalized with a massive amount of front money. And he must give these straight boys a lot of that money to do what he gets them to do.

Two nights ago I was whacking-off to Sean’s website and came across one of the hottest blonde guys I’ve ever seen. He’s a twenty year old stud named Alan, and the second I laid eyes on him (and hands on my cock) I fell in love. A handsome face, a terrific body, a large dick, and fuzzy, untrimmed pubes make him my (nearly) ideal man (Nearly because I like men with hairy chests, which Alan doesn’t have. But -- Fuck! -- I‘ll take what I can get, and this guy is amazing.) And did I mention the light blonde hairs lightly covering Alan’s balls -- also untrimmed? Jesus, it nearly threw me over the edge. And in fact it did throw me over the edge of orgasm. I shot a huge wad when I first saw this kid's hairy nuts. Almost as large a load as he shot at the end of the clip.

By the way, yesterday was my birthday, and if any of you out there are feeling generous, and if any of you know Alan personally, feel free to send him my way as a birthday gift. I solemnly promise to take care of him. I do! I promise to bathe him (with my tongue), feed him (my cock), make sure he has a nice place to sleep (my bed), and love him forever (in so many ways I can’t even start listing them.)

Just keep him away from that fuckin’ razor.

(By the way, I have much larger versions of the Alan montages below. If you'd like to see larger versions, please feel free to email me at axelg58@hotmail.com and I'll be happy to send them to you. I'll just want to hear what you think of them, that's all.)

Drinks with Tony DeSergio

2006-09-30T01:08:00.000-07:00

There’s a hot bartender at one of the gay bars I frequent, who, when I first met him, I found sexy in a very familiar way I couldn’t quite put my finger on (Although there’s a lot about the guy I would like to put my finger on -- if you know what I mean.) Every time I went to the bar when he was tending, I kept trying to figure out why he seemed famliar, how I recognized him.

One evening I was looking at him (not without lust in my eyes, I admit) and suddenly I realized why he seemed so familiar. He looks exactly (and I mean exactly) like straight Euro-porn-stud Tony DeSergio.

DeSergio is one hot cum-machine. I always love seeing him when I rent porn flicks. He has a large cock and he knows how to use it. He appears to love ramming his dick up a wet pussy or ass or mouth, eats snatch like he’s starving, and he shoots massive loads of salty, sticky jizz. He is handsome, well built, and it’s always pleasant to see him naked and turned on.

Now when I look at my local bartender, I no longer see a nice guy (Who -- did I mention? -- is straight even if he does work in a gay bar) serving strong drinks. Instead I see Tony DeSergio pounding some slut’s cunt, pulling out at the last moment and squirting salvo after salvo of dripping cum all over her face and into her mouth.

He must have noticed I’m gazing oddly at him. He probably thinks I have the hots for him (which I kind of do.) I’m sure he doesn’t have any idea I’m thinking about straight sex.

Wouldn’t he be surprised?

Soon ... I Promise

2006-09-25T13:27:00.001-07:00

Yes, "Soon ... I promise ..." as Stephen Sondheim said in A Little Night Music. I've been unbelievably busy, but I've still been whacking to some great porn in my limited spare time. I'll try and post something about something nasty this week.

Meanwhile, to make up for my absence, here are a couple random shots of hot men I've found while surfing. Not really anything to do with anything, just pictures I collected and liked.

Check back soon. I promise there's more to come!

Ewan Me

2006-08-18T20:23:00.000-07:00

I was looking back over some of my past posts here at Porn Watcher, and was thinking about the naked pictures of Heath Ledger I posted a few months ago, and the hard-core montage from Colin Farrell‘s amateur fuck video. I was thinking about them, because I just found a montage of Ewan Mac Gregor from the outstanding art film, The Pillow Book.

I saw The Pillow Book years ago when it was first released and loved it. I thought it was an insightful and touching film, but what has stuck in my memory the longest was that Mr. Mac Gregor appeared naked in the movie -- a lot! And it was full frontal. And it was impressive. He has a great big, beautifully shaped dick. And although it never becomes erect in the film, it is still a great big, beautifully shaped dick!

And so finding this montage on the web a couple days ago brought all those terrific memories back. And, besides, I knew you’d want to see it.

So here’s Ewan naked from The Pillow Book. Enjoy.

Brothers Final Score

2006-08-14T00:17:00.000-07:00

Okay, there’s recently been a lot of comments here at Porn Watcher about the Brother’s Fucking clip I wrote about on July 28th in the Philadelphia Freedom post. A friend gave me a DVD copy of it without telling me where he found it. A lot of readers wrote in suggesting it came from a lot of different places. Well, I’ve done a little research and found out where the clip actually originated.

It is in fact from Treasure Island Media. It’s the first scene in a film called Swallow.

The Russell Brothers (Tyler and Nick) kiss, suck, fuck until Nick shoots cum all over Tyler‘s face and into his mouth. That’s followed by a six man orgy and the film finishes with a horny couple. As reader Tim told us in his comment under More Brothers & A Lot More Hair below (August 10th posting), these scene are all bareback and feature cum eating, in fact every jizz shot is consumed by one hot guy or another.

The film, directed by Paul Morris, was produced in 2000. Check out more information about Swallow at http://www.treasureislandmedia.com/tivideo/swallow.htm

There is also a link to a page detailing how director Morris discovered the brothers, and it’s kind of fun to read --- and kind of hot. Check it out and enjoy.

Here are a few pictures of the Russell Brothers from Swallow doing what they love doing. Check it and them out.

So Much Porn, So Little Time

2006-08-13T21:50:00.000-07:00

I love getting emails from readers and recently received one asking quite an interesting question. I was asked if every time I watch a porn film or read a dirty story or serf the net for sex, I write about it here at Porn Watcher. I’m sorry to say the answer is no. There just isn’t enough time for me to write a detailed break-down every time I jack-off to pre-produced porn.

I know if you follow this blog, it may seem like that’s all I am interested in or do. It doesn't appear this way but the truth is I really do have a life and a job and other hobbies. So although I stroke my cock almost everyday, and even though I do look at hot pictures of hard cock, sweaty sex and spurting sperm nearly every day, I just don’t have time to describe every one of my whacking events.

I’m not saying I’m not obsessed with adult material, I am. There just aren’t enough hours in my day to compose a post about every film or picture or story I look at while playing with myself. I wish I could, but I’m afraid you’d get bored for one thing. And, if I wrote about my chicken choking each time I choked the chicken I wouldn’t have time for any chicken choking!

It’s a nasty catch 22, isn’t it?

Say What?

2006-08-12T23:36:00.000-07:00

Okay, I’ll admit it, I’m kind of a foreign movie freak. I love films by Kurosawa, Bergman, Fellini and Fassbinder (Yes, I‘ve even seen all sixteen and a half hours of Berlin Alexanderplatz, and enjoyed every second of it.) I love these movies. And I’m just enough of a snob that I don’t want to see them dubbed. I like subtitles, mostly because I want to hear the actors’ original interpretations of the lines, even if I can’t understand what they’re saying. Often the dubbed foreign films I’ve seen have been translated oddly, so the dialogue almost doesn’t make sense.

But none have been as ludicrously dubbed as a straight Scandinavian porn flick I purchased recently titled What Women Need from Phoenix Releasing. Directed by and starring the blonde bombshell Ingrid Swede, the film dwells too long on exposition dialogue and with setting up scenes, but the sex is hot and nasty, the women slutty in the best possible way, and the sex scenes plentiful (running time is a remarkable 145 minutes.) Other than Ms. Swede the cast is entirely mono-monikered: Pirkoo, Lucika, Angelica, Melica, Ray, Samson, Martin. And did I mention the men are very hot? In fact, I bought the film because of a hot stud wearing a white uniform on the back cover. And, even better for me, I’ve never seen any of these guys before, and with one exception, they’re muscular, handsome and hung. The only problem is there is no way of telling which guy is which, and so it's impossible to figure out which of the hot men is Samson and which is Martin.

I didn’t know Ms. Swede’s work as a director before I got this video, but I’ll be looking for more of her films next time I head to the porn store. A group of four women at a dinner party are discussing what turns them on sexually. That’s the whole plot. Of course we see each of the things that get these ladies going, and some of the sequences are amazingly hot. We see a dildo salesman pitching his wares to a young girl, a woman seducing a boxer in the locker room, a male masseuse who uses more than just his hands, and a women’s private performance by a male stripper is interrupted by her husband who then joins the fun. The finest scene is the finale, and it’s the only time Ms. Swede performs sexually. She is banged by three stunning men, hungrily sucking their large cocks while they’re fucking her in every conceivable position. They end the sequence by dumping load after load of hot jizz all over her. She looks at the camera, the rivulets of cum dripping off her face onto her ample tits, smiles, and then the topper: The work “Slut” is superimposed over her image. Just terrific.

The problem? The English translation used to dub the lines was not written by someone for whom English is a first language. It’s not just that the over lengthy dialogue scenes are boring, that could be true if the film were viewed in Swedish. It’s that grammar and scansion are no where in evidence. We are subjected to such lines as “Let me show to you my many sex toys, which we can then play with and taste.” Or “Sex is many times much fun.”

The actors reading the English translation are heavily accented, mostly with Swedish accents. The exception is for a hot Asian girl who fucks and sucks in the massage scene; for some reason, she has an Italian accent.

I certainly recommend What Women Need. I’m just telling you to watch it with the sound turned off. Imagine what they’re saying to each other. Whatever you make-up will be better than what's actully coming out of their mouths.

More Brothers & A Lot More Hair

2006-08-10T21:43:00.000-07:00

A reader named Kevin emailed me yesterday with a comment about the Brother’s Fucking clip I wrote about a few days ago.

I just found your blog, read the article about the Brothers Fucking video clip, and tried - but was unable to leave a response... so I hope you don't mind me replying to you directly.
The clip ISN'T from Sean Cody, but it's listed as such on Limewire, which is a free file sharing service, and where I downloaded the clip.
Coincidentally, I happened to stumble on the true origin of the clip recently: Treasure Island Media (although I haven't been able to find the actual page again at the moment). There, it confirms that the two guys ARE real brothers: it goes into more detail about how it all began, which seems to prove it's genuine. Also, Nick (the older brother) tells some stories of his sexual exploits as a cycle courier: the one with the straight college guy is sizzling!
I hope this has been of help to you.
By the way, I'm a pube fan too! And just in case you're interested you can check out some pics of mine here...
http://www.juicygoo.com/imagecontributions/gallery.php?galleryid=130
...pubes intact!
Have fun!

The pictures of Kevin’s hairy body and huge cock are stunning, so check them out. And, as a preview, here’s another picture of him he took just last night, howling at the full moon.

Thanks, Kevin! For everything!

Even More Watching

2006-08-09T20:46:00.000-07:00

The Universe is funny sometimes. The other night I wrote about the extraordinary straight classic, I Like To Watch, and all of a sudden today a friend emails me a picture from it without knowing it was from one of my favorite films.

As I said, porn icon Bridgitte Monet (who, we’ve since learned, may or may not have been psycho in real life) would only fuck boyfriend David Cannon on screen. That is, except on two occasions; Once with John Leslie in Talk Dirty To Me 2, and a second time with Mike Horner in I Like To Watch. And that brings us to the picture my buddy sent.

It’s a shot from the final scene in the movie, where Horner and Monet go for it in a television studio. Sure they think no one is watching, but … Here is the picture of Bridgitte blowing Mike. Very hot. And frankly, I’ve never seen this still before, but I‘m thrilled to have it now. If you have any other stills you're willing to share from I Like To Watch I'd love to have them. Throw me an email at axelg58@hotmail.com.

So if you needed any additional motivation to see this fine film, here it is.

The Mile High Club

2006-08-07T00:23:00.000-07:00

I went to the local porn store to go a renting this weekend. I found a terrific gay film from the wonderful folks at Falcon Productions called Taking Flight, Part One. If the sequel is anything like what I saw last night, I’ll be needing two more nights to get all the way through it. Taking Flight has some major structural problems, but in the end it is a cum-buster!

The adorably muscled Jason Adonis plays an airline pilot, and the film follows his sexual escapades as he flies around the world picking up hot men. From London to San Francisco he frequents sleazy night spots and even sleazier bathhouses. While the horny guys he meets at these places are always ready to suck, rim and fuck at the drop of a hat (or at the drop of Adonis' pants), there is just as much cock pumping going on midair during the flight, 30,000 feet up as there is on the ground.

The sexual scenes are uniformly hot and sweaty, but unfortunately also somewhat uniformly formulaic. What happens in the first scene is what happens in the final scene just with different men, every sexual activity occurs in the exact same order in every scene. Yes, the guys are stunningly hot, and what they’re doing is nasty and very enjoyable, but knowing what’s about to happen before it does takes some of the entertainment value out of the experience.

The film predominantly focuses on cock-sucking, heavy rimming (one of my favorite things in a porn flick) and fucking. Those three things happen in each scene, and in that exact order every time. It’s always hot when they begin to go for it, but each time a new activity is shown, it goes on far too long, and I fast-forwarded to the next position change almost every time.

Taking Flight, Part One features four couplings and one extremely nasty group sex sequence with six filthy sex-pigs. What I most liked about this video was the men. There are few twinks in evidence here. These are real men: muscular, unshaven, experienced, nasty and enthusiastic. They know how to enjoy agressive man sex and expect their partner to know how to enjoy it as well. The boner inducing international all-star cast includes Matthew Rush (listed as the star, but only appearing in one scene), Arpad Miklos, Ashley Long, Brad Patton, Corbin Michaels, Dean Monroe, Gus Mattox, Josh Weston (the only member of the cast to be featured in more than one scene), Kent Larson, Maxx Diesel, Nate Alexander, Troy Rebel and many others.

The biggest discovery for me was Collin O’Neal, who fucks Weston in the final scene. Massive muscles, handsome face, hairy chest with large, lickable nipples, everything about this guy is hot. I can’t wait to find more of his videos and see him do much, much more.

Both parts of Taking Flight were directed in 2004 by Chris Steele. Steele, always stunning in his own past sexual appearances, is becoming an adult gay video director to be reckoned with (Watch out Chi Chi LaRue and Jerry Douglass.) He likes men with chest hair and, occasionally, even a full patch of pubes. (Now, Chris, could we please have hairy, unshaved balls and everyone with furry, untrimmed pubes?) All these men obviously love having sex. And even though the sex becomes predictable, this movie is hot. Let’s just hope Taking Flight, Part Two can live up to its predecessor. If it isn’t as hot as this flick, well … that’ll give my cock a nose dive.

Here's a few stills from Taking Flight.

I Really Like To Watch

2006-08-06T19:09:00.000-07:00

One of my most nostalgic memories of buying a ticket and walking into a theatre and watching a porn movie (and, clandestinely pulling out my cock and jacking-off) was attending a film titled I Like To Watch. First of all, it’s a nearly perfect porn title, and the film perfectly follows suit.

I pulled out my old VHS copy of this fine film two nights ago, and re-enjoyed every second of the provocative dialogue scenes, got off to the hot, nasty sex sequences, and reveled in the memories of seeing these very images on the big screen in my youth.

The plot of this 1982 pot-boiler is somewhat forgettable (the screenplay credit goes to director Paul G. Vatelli.) It involves a young woman, played with complete lack of acting subtly by the beautiful and shapely Bridgitte Monet (who’s real name was Dana Kunath) working for her aunt (Patricia Manning), a negligee designer. That’s the set-up and after that … who cares? What makes this film so strokable is that every sex scene, whether an intimate couple fucking or a three-way orgy, features not just the sex, but someone else watching the hedonists enjoying each other, usually without their knowledge. This starts to make the very concepts of porn watching complicated. We, the audience, are watching someone on the screen watching unaware sexual participants during their most private moments. It is what pornography primarily is all about.

Monet & Cannon

Ms. Monet participates in only three sex sequences, and that’s just fine. No matter which of her films you watch, she was always extremely icy in her fucking. You never got any inkling she was in any way enjoying herself. But she was lovely to look at, had a great body, and wasn’t afraid to show it off. She was something of an anomaly in the porn industry because she limited her onscreen sexual activities to other women or to her boy friend David Cannon (here billed as David Smith.) I Like To Watch is one of only two films in which she breaks her rule (the other is Talk Dirty To Me 2 in which she fucks John Leslie.) Ms. Monet does hump Cannon here, and does a girl-girl scene with the delightful Lisa DeLeeuw, but in the final scene also sucks and fucks the indispensable Mike Horner (often billed, as he is in this movie, as Don Hart.)

Cannon Cums on Monet in I Like To Watch

Kevin James and Little Oral Annie have an unbelievably hot scene; Horner gives us a stunning three-way with Elevna Desantis and Linda Shaw; and even the usually uncompelling Manning is jackable as she gets a face full of cum from Herschel Savage.

This is outstanding classic straight porn. If I were forced to rate I Like To Watch in the list of the finest adult films ever made, I would cheerfully rank it in the top ten.

And, as I said before, watching I Like To Watch brings back terrific memories. I vividly recall sitting in that porn theatre on a weekday afternoon (I was in college at the time) loving every scene in this hot picture, and looking over and seeing a friend sitting two rows behind me, jacking-off. I didn’t freak out seeing him there as I would have had I seen almost anyone else I knew. This friend often hosted group-sex parties at his home that I regularily attended with four or five other people, so seeing him playing with his cock was no great shock. But it confirmed to me I wasn’t the only person in the world who loved this art form known as pornography.

So, I guess if nothing else, this movie taught me that I Like To Watch. That’s certainly something to be grateful for.

Eye To Eye with the Obvious

2006-07-29T23:29:00.000-07:00

I’ve needed new contact lenses for a while and so recently went to an Optometrist I hadn‘t visited before. (And, no, my eyes weren’t failing because I’d been jacking-off watching too much porn. It had been three or four years since my last check up, that‘s all.) My room mate accompanied me to the exam, and as we waited in the receptionist area I filled out the New Patient forms. There was an odd category; "List your hobbies."

I had to stop and think about this question. The usual answers seemed so trite: reading, music, theatre, baseball, cooking, wine. Sure I enjoy all that, but are they my hobbies? I turned to my room mate and asked him what he thought my hobbies are. He pondered for quite a while, then got an odd look on his face, looked at me and earnestly asked, “Porn?”

I guess he nailed it. You just can’t get away from the truth, can you?

So I dutifully wrote down “Reading, music, theatre, baseball, cooking, wine.”

Philadelphia Freedom

2006-07-28T22:01:00.000-07:00

Incest is not a porn topic that automatically turns me on. Sure, I love the Taboo series of films and, yes, they deal exclusively with familys having sex with each other. But blood relations swapping bodily fluids through close contact isn’t something I obsess on or even think about much. Let’s put it this way, I don’t jack-off thinking about any of my relations, and I never have.

However, a web-surfing friend recently copied a brief video from Rapidshare (or a site like that) of two brothers enthusiastically doing each other like pigs. My buddy put it on a DVD for me with a few other short porn videos he downloaded. The brothers’ names are not supplied, and I have no idea which web site originated the film. My copy is jerky, as web videos often are (and as I did while I watched it.)

It is fascinating when the older (dominant) brother is interviewed (the younger passive brother remains remarkable silent), explaining that they started sucking each other off in high school. Then the older bro left for college and when he returned home for holiday visits was when he actully started fucking his eighteen year old brother. Today they live together in a monogamous, committed relationship. They’re a couple … and they’re brothers. And now, internet porn stars.

I have to admit I found the film very hot. They start with fervent kissing, and it is real, passionate, heavy kissing. Then a stunning, sloppy blow-job, the kind of blow-job where the cock is worshiped and adored. A quick 69 session is followed by the intense bare-back fucking, during which they enjoy several positions. They kiss a few times while pumping away, and the older brother gently, delicately nuzzles and kisses his brother’s back or shoulder or ear. They lock eyes deeply a couple of times, and if I’m any judge of the look on their faces, they’re in love; real profound love.

When the older brother pulls his cock out of his bro’s ass-hole, the younger man pushes his hips into the air, spurting cum onto his own face and waiting mouth. Then he wipes his own juice off his face and licks it off his fingers, all the while moaning. The older brother crawls up and, jerking-off, shoots an amazingly huge load of spurting white foam onto his sibling’s face and open, hungry mouth. The younger man mops up as much of his brother’s cum off his face with his fingers and feeds it to himself, loving every drop and every moment of it. He engulfs the large cock with his mouth once again, sending shudders through his older sibling.

The cameraman, who interviewed them earlier, films a close-up of the now soaked sheets, covered by the excess spunk that didn’t land of the young stud’s face. The cameraman comments on the massive amount of semen, and wonders if the older guy always shoots so much jizz. Finally speaking, the younger man says, “Oh, yes. Always.”

This is hot porn. It only lasts about ten minutes, but it brought me to a shuttering climax. I wish I knew what web site it was from. I wish I knew who these boys are. I wish I knew where they lived. I wish I could watch them fuck in person. Simply amazing.

You Want To Put That Where?

2006-07-23T01:22:00.000-07:00

One of my room mates subscribes to Instinct, a very fine gay magazine. Instinct features terrific lifestyle articles, fascinating fashion layouts, and essays written from slightly dirty gay points of view. In the recent July issue, columnist Dave White recounted his short foray into the porn industry as a production assistant. The article was very funny, as White’s writing always proves to be.

Hidden in the article was a little trivia tid-bit about porn production that was news to me, and something I became fascinated and even a little obsessed with. White discussed Viagra and its use on the adult film set. Yes, the boys take it to get them up and keep them up. But sometimes even the little blue helper doesn’t work. Luckily, pharmaceutical companies have rushed into the forefront of keeping our fuck stars working hard.

There is a drug called Caverject. It supplies wood quickly and reliably, and it keeps the patient hard for about three hours. The fact this drug exists makes sense and isn’t terribly surprising. But what did make me stop dead in my tracks was the fact that Caverject must be administered by a doctor, and -- hold on to something -- isn’t a pill. You might notice the drug is called Caverject. Really have a look at that final syllable. Caverject. Yes, you receive Caverject through an injection! And it doesn’t go in your arm. Or your butt. No, the hypodermic needle is inserted directly where you really don’t want anything sharp inserted.

Sure, Caverject may get porn studs harder than a rock, but stop for a minute and think about how your arm feels when you’ve been to the doctor and gotten an everyday inoculation. Or when you're visiting the dentist and get numbed. The spot you receive the injection becomes irritatingly sore. So it can’t be much fun to fuck with a sore stiffy, even if it won‘t go soft. How do they do it?

I’d be very interested to know how often porn stars get the shaft shot. Is it extremely common? Or is it just a contingency plan, used very occasionally? But what I’m really interested in is, what happened to the days when the sex stars at least looked like they were fucking because they enjoyed it? Makes you miss Jack Wrangler and Jon King reveling in gay sex, and Randy West and Paul Thomas celebrating straight sex, doesn’t it? I bet they never got their cocks shot full of stiffy juice.

A Don't Miss -- Oral Exams

2006-07-22T22:30:00.000-07:00

I’m home from Seattle and extremely excited to report on a gay porn film I saw while I was in Washington State’s Emerald City. Oral Exams is one of the most amazing “all oral” videos I’ve ever seen. It got me off intensely and memorably. It is stunningly hot, and if you read no further, please go out and rent or buy it. It is simply terrific.

Sometimes specialty porn can become tiresome. I usually don’t care for foot fetish films or bondage movies or videos focusing on a single sex act. That is, I felt that way until I started watching specialty porn directed by the great Chi Chi LaRue, like this one produced for her Rascal Video/Channel 1 Releasing company. I’ve had a movie for a couple years helmed by Ms. LaRue called Ass Lick Alley (I‘ll write about it some day, I promise.) As you might guess, it’s a rimming movie, and it’s hotter than hell. Oral Exams is even hotter. As you can guess from the title, Oral Exams completely about blow-jobs, although there are a few rim jobs thrown in just for fun. Fucking, it seems, was saved for the sequel Detention, which I have yet to see. Oral Exams swept the 2003 GayVN Awards and with very good reason.

Handsome and hung Matt Summers is the true star of this film which features 11 very handsome and hung guys. Summers insures his stardom with his extraordinary deep throating talents. He plays a student who, in the first scene, discovers the school janitor jacking-off in a utility closet. I don’t know the name of the actor playing Summers’ floor-mopping playmate, but he has a massively huge cock, possibly equiling the infamous John Holmes.. Unfortunately, he’s about as good looking as Holmes. But with a cock that size, it’s forgivable. Summers, surprisingly, can take every inch of it down his throat and he looks like he’s having a great time doing it. The janitor, delightfully, has one of the filthiest mouths since Jeff Stryker, and as Summers gulps and gags on the huge dick time after time the guy with the big cock issues dirtier and dirtier orders. The effect the stunning. Although the culminating cum shots are a little disappointing, this is still a magnificent, dirty, sexy scene.

The second sequence is relatively disappointing. Two jocks in a locker room overhear two other guys talking about a cock-sucking class they’re attending the next day. When the two students leave, the jocks are so turned on they trade blow-jobs and rim each other. It all seems perfunctory, and passionless. Again the appearance of the jizz isn’t very exciting.

Then we get to the third and final scene. Summers and nine other young, muscled students gather in a class room waiting for the aforementioned cock-sucking class. Their older (but buff and hot with a shaved head) teacher tells them he’s leaving them alone for a few minutes and to behave themselves. Well, you know what happens, the boys all start fooling around, then start jerking-off, then start blowing each other. Soon they’re all naked and going at it in varied and imaginative combinations (a hall-mark of a Chi Chi LaRue film.) The teacher returns, strips naked and joins in. Unsurprisingly, the janitor also shows up. Following an extended sequence of expert knob-polishing from all the guys, Summers is thrown on his back onto a desk, and one by one each of the other ten hunks aggressively face fuck him. They roughly force their large, straining cocks down his willing and hungry throat, their hefty, low-hanging balls violently slapping against his nose. He deep throats each and every stud, taking each cock deeply several times. If you can watch this scene and not develop hard-on, then frankly you may be dead.

Here’s the part of the video where the cum flows freely and prodigiously. Each and every drop of the spunk produced shoots onto Summers’ smiling face. By film’s end he is happy, contented, and barely recognizable through the sticky cock-snot. Amazing!

The remarkable cast includes Chris Bolt, Danny Chance, Brett Collins, Hans Ebson, Rob Kirk, Antonio Majors, Marco Paris, Victor Rios, Ray Stone, Damon West and, of course Matt Summers.

This is a film that is destined to become classic porn. Don’t miss it. I can’t wait to see it again and again. And to shoot my own cum to it again and again. Oral Exams is, quite simply, one of the best ever made.

Lollipop Perfection

2006-07-15T12:59:00.000-07:00

I’m currently visiting beautiful Seattle on business, but now that I have actually gone out and bought a laptop, I’m able to keep up with the blog wherever I am. The evening before I left for the Emerald City, I took my pants off and enjoyed most of one of the great straight classics of all time, Lollipop Palace.

Directed in 1976 by the amazing Kirdy Stevens (who also directed the first three films in the brilliant Taboo series), this homage to San Francisco’s great cat-houses is set in the depression inflicted 1930s. Bunny Savage plays naïve Bonnie, a young woman out of work and starving, who decides to become a “workin’ girl.” She visits the best and bawdiest bordello in town, run by the local madam, played with relish by Frenchie Dior. Ms. Dior performs the entire role as a really bad Mae West impersonation -- and I mean so bad it would make a drag queen wince. But, that being said, it’s still very funny, and Ms. Dior’s delivery of some of Ms. West’s best lines (“A good man is hard to find and a hard man is good to find.”) become hilarious in their ineptitude.

That being said, this is marvelous classic porn. The movie starts with one whore having her face blasted with sticky cum from a hot, unidentified young man. Then a sailor is taken (and I do mean taken) by another of the madam’s girls to a dungeon where she makes him rape her, then ties him up and beats him with a whip until he shoots into her mouth.

There’s a terrific three-way with a hooker, an Italian customer, and his male translator. A brash Texan, played by Rick Lutz shows up with his wife. The wife wants to try being a whore and so she goes off with John Holmes while “Tex” heads off with two of the madam‘s employees. He makes the girls put on a show for him before joining them, ordering them around while they suck him, and then he fucks them extremely hard. This is an enormously hot scene, as hot as anything Kirdy Stevens ever directed. In fact, I feel safe to say it may be Stevens’ finest, most boner inducing scene of all. As I mentioned earlier, I didn’t watch this entire movie. This cum bubbling scene is the reason.

I have to say one thing about John Holmes. I know he is a porn icon. I know he may be the most famous (and notorious) adult film star that ever was or maybe ever will be. I know he is that rarest of things, a male star who sells tickets and DVDs in straight porn. I know all that. But I don’t like the guy. This film is a perfect example. Although filled with hot scenes, Holmes here presents another of his perfunctory, passionless fucks. Sure he has a huge cock, and yes, I’m a little bit of a size queen, but his disinterest coupled with his at best unattractive face and undefined muscle tone make him an instant turn-off. It probably doesn’t help to know he died of AIDS while I’m watching him have unprotected sex. Sorry to say it, but when he appears on my television screen, I usually reach for the fast-forward button, and it was no different with Lollipop Palace.

Don’t be fooled by the packaging, the girls on the DVD cover currently being marketed appear nowhere in the film. But the movie is hot, the sex varied, the performers attractive (except for Holmes), and the plot contains that rarest of concepts in porn, humor. If you’re into great classic straight adult cinema buy or rent Lollipop Palace. You won’t be disappointed.

Public Plumpys

2006-07-09T23:31:00.000-07:00

When I was a teenager I would get unintended hard-ons instantly and it could happen in almost any given situation; the class-room, walking down the street, watching an episode of Happy Days. There didn’t have to be anything erotic happening around me, or being discussed, or even lurking in my own mind. Sometimes, for no discernable reason -- Be-Wang-Agagagag -- Major wood! And usually major visible wood

I’m not saying I have trouble getting erect now, I don’t. But it doesn’t just happen by itself when I least expect it. I have some control over my cock’s activities, and I’ve learned how to hide a plumpy when it becomes necessary. The only way I can imagine getting caught tenting is if someone were to walk in on me jacking-off and no one has walked in on me practicing my favorite hobby lately (not since I was 12 and my mother caught me, but that’s another story. I have a close friend who claims there is only one thing to say when someone surprises you whacking. You don’t try to hide what you’re doing, you just look up at them and say, “Oh. I was just thinking about you.”)

I mention Stone Basket because the other evening I was at my local porn emporium browsing through the racks of new DVD releases. I’m always looking for hot new strokers, as well as films I haven't seen my favorite stars are in. Also searching the other night was a nice looking guy, dirty blonde hair, about 30. Not a child by any means, an adult, and someone who’d been an adult for quite a while.

I wasn’t cruising him, I just noticed him, noticed he was fairly good looking, and noticed he was looking through the straight movies. (I know, I know, that doesn’t mean anything. God knows, I’m often in the straight section myself, but sometimes you can just look at a person, particularly in a porno store, and know if they’re gay or straight.) The point is, I noticed this guy, but the main thing I noticed about him was the extremely large protrusion bulging up and to the right through his jeans. The guy had a Major Rager happening in his pants. It was impossible not to notice he was hard, he was hung, and he either didn’t know he was showing or didn’t know how to mask it.

He looked at the movies for five minutes or so, without noticeable softening, and then, not buying or renting anything, departed. Now I have never gotten a hard-on in a porn store -- or at least not while looking through the DVD cases -- I have been known to disappear into the arcade area, and what’s happened to my cock there -- well, just use your imagination.

I guess I admire this guy in a way; Springing a stiffy so easily and publicly, and then wearing it with pride. I mean, it’s a Porn Store! We’re all there to find literature (or visuals) to get us hard and get us off. He was just way ahead of the game, and frankly, what’s wrong with that?

And, did I mention, seeing him browsing with an obviously engorged member was a real turn on? I didn’t get hard in the store myself, but I could have. But when I got home and started thinking about what I’d seen, well, then I did.

Sam Jones Isn't Playgirl Material Now

2006-07-07T17:07:00.000-07:00

There are some television networks I normally wouldn’t watch on a dare, but will always stop and check out when I’m channel surfing. I don’t want to mention any names, but one of those networks is run by, aimed at, and programmed purely by evangelical Christians. I’m not at all religious myself, and, I have to admit, often find the way rabid Christians think, speak and behave to be hilariously funny. I particularly find miraculous healings entertaining, and so I never miss checking to see what’s happening on the particular network in question.

So, last night I’m jumping from channel to channel, and of course stop to see what the Jesus Jumpers are up to. No healings, unfortunately, but something just as amusing. On a very homey set, complete with comfortable couch and fireplace, sat legendary cowboy spouse Dale Evans, the late wife of the even later Roy Rogers. Now Miss Evans has been dead for at least four years, and my assumption that the Rapture must have occurred and Miss Evans had been resurrected proved to be incorrect. I discovered at the end of the show, the current television program is a compilation of her finest past interviews with Christian stars.

Okay, you say, but what the fuck does this have to do with watching porn? Hang on, I’m getting to it.

Dale was improbably interviewing Todd Bridges. (Now if that doesn’t catch your eye, you’ve got to be dead.) I won’t go into details of the conversation, but the juxtaposition of an old school Hollywood diva and one of television’s most notorious bad boys (I mean, come on, he did shoot somebody once) couldn’t have been more sublimely bizarre or funnier.

But then, then next guest came on. I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. It was Sam Jones. He was introduced as Bo Derek’s costar in the classic sex farce 10, as well as the guy who played the extremely sexy title character in Flash Gordon. They talked about his film and television career, the numerous awards he’s received, his conversion to Christianity, and what he’s up to these days (not much). What they didn’t talk about was his famous 1975 spreads (and I do mean spread) in Playgirl Magazine. His two or three nude layouts made him one of the magazine’s most remembered and requested models. He even became a Playgirl Man of the Year, as well as appearing on the cover of their tenth anniversary issue.

I vividly remember Jones’ pictures in Playgirl. I was a teenager when I discovered them, and jacked-off to them endlessly. I thought it was so sexy to see a star I had seen on the big screen walking around naked, freely showing his large hairy cock, and just generally looking stunningly hot.

Let me tell you, he doesn’t look like that anymore. Jones has not aged well in the 30 years since he posed nude, and frankly, he looks (as Miss Evans might have said) like he’s been rode hard and put away wet. From what he said in the interview, he has had something of a tough road. But he has renounced his mistakes, he claims, and turned away from his sinful past. He never said what that past was, but to the ears of someone like me, who had jacked-off endlessly to photos of this hunk, it could only have had to do with sex.

All I can say is, I hope Jones had a lot of fun back then. I sure would have liked to have had some fun with him. Back then, I mean.

The Best -- "Kiss-Off"

2006-07-05T20:02:00.000-07:00

Since I started writing this blog, I’ve mentioned several times that my favorite gay porn film -- in fact, my favorite porn film from any genre -- is a Jerry Douglas directed feature from All World’s Video titled Kiss-Off. I’ve mentioned in past posts I believe Kiss-Off is the finest adult film ever made, and watching it again last night confirmed that opinion. The fact the film also stars my “Slut-Around-The-Internet” namesake, Axel Garret, only makes me love it more.

The video, from 1992, is the only porn movie I’ve ever watched where I didn’t once -- not once -- reach for the fast-forward button. I was fascinated and involved (not to mention hard as a rock) throughout. There’s a reason this movie won every gay film award in the universe the year it was produced. The word classic was coined for films like Kiss-Off.

The credit for the success of this amazing feature must be laid at the feet of writer-director Jerry Douglas. Considered the finest director in gay porn today -- side by side with Chi Chi LaRue -- he started his career in legitimate theatre, directing plays in regional theatre and Off-Broadway. But it’s his work in gay adult cinema that made his name. Some of his greatest films include The Back Row, Flesh and Blood, More of a Man, Dream Team, and many other tightly plotted movies. One of his earlier films, Trade-Off, also starred Axel Garret and the legendary Ryan Idol. Although neither of those two did anything other than jack-off in that film, it remains very, very hot. But not as hot as its un-official sequel, Kiss-Off.

(DISCLAIMER: The review below has been cannibalized from several reviews I found on line. I knew I wanted to give this special film more than the usual space I would devote to a review, and so the opinions of others were important to me. If you wrote a review of Kiss-Off, and recognize some of your statements below, please don’t be pissed off. I stole snatches from you because I admire your turn of phrase.)

Axel Garret is a hunky, muscular, ex-marine with a sheaf of blond hair flopping over his tranquil, hypnotic blue eyes, and wispy golden curls glisten on his legs, his bubble-butt ass, and around a cock that’s classic perfection. He plays a beat cop who busts a crime ring and makes detective, but when he gets to his new partner's office, he's completely confused. Michael Brawn, strapping and masculine, informs Axel they will be working vice, attempting to arrest gay men in the act of public sex. He gives Axel a wife-beater and old, torn jeans to wear. "No underwear!" he barks at Axel. "Hope you got a big dick. It helps." Off they go to a notorious cruising men’s room in a park, sending the novice in to make a bust. "Get yourself in there ... and bag yourself a queer."

Nervous Axel loiters in the bathroom until the hot Danny Sommers makes his entrance. Standing at the urinal with a hard-on, he makes eyes at Axel who knows his duty. He's uncomfortable with it, and after a long section of will-he-or-won't-he, he finally allows Danny to stroke his limp dick while Michael secretly watches from a vent above. One thing leads to another, and Danny convinces Axel he deserves some head. Danny starts out with the softest, gentlest blow-job possible, then he deep-throats, but his lips barely touch the cock, and as Axel begins to relax, he goes full-throttle and adds a hand. It's masterful cocksucking and is filmed so close you can almost feel Danny's pleasure. Axel blasts a fountain of cum all over his own wife-beater and onto Danny's face, and then Danny beats-off. After it's over, Danny invites him to come back for more sometime. He also tells Axel to bring cash because "the vice squad, they can be bought, you know." Axel is now even more confused than when he started.

SCREEN CAPTURES FROM THE MEN'S ROOM SCENE

At home, we find Axel even more addled. He puts on a construction helmet, then plants Ryan Idol’s running shorts (which Axel scored in Trade-Off) around his neck, and walks back to his chair, naked and hard. Axel’s gorgeous cock is shown in close up, swaying in the breeze, and it is stunningly hot. After watching a little home-made porn on his video camera, he falls asleep and is later awakened by Michael's blaring car horn. He decides to take the video camera to work with him. In the park, the two of them are in Michael's car where Michael tells Axel he's trying to bust a rich kid. The suspected perp arrives in the form of usually luscious but way over primped Chad Knight. The cops separate and Michael chases after Chad supposedly to arrest him. Michael, sporting a gigantic dick, comes over to Chad, who dive-bombs the cop-cock, sucking with amazing intensity and delivering a whiz-bang deep-throat without moving a hair on his manicured pompadour. It's here that Axel makes an appearance, shooting the entire episode on his video camera. The lovers don't know it, but they certainly perform as if they do. The fuck lasts a short time, then Michael begins to arrest Chad, who gets out of it by paying him off. And Axel gets it all on video.

The next day, Axel and Michael go to a "porn pit" where Axel is sent into a movie theater. He finds slab-of-beef Steve Gibson, wearing a leather jacket, leather chaps and nothing else. B.J. Slater blows Steve before moving in front of the screen, standing naked for the movie patrons to see everything (including Axel with his trusty camera). What follows is even more sucking, as well as face-fucking, butt-plug play, domination, rimming, and a nasty, creamy facial. Someone yells out they're being busted by a vice cop, and everyone panics, but Axel doesn't pursue the escaping leather men.

Axel has now made two video tapes of home made stroke material, but he's interrupted from a whack session when he notices that the apartment across the alley has been rented. A dick pops out of the blind slats, followed by a phone number. When Axel calls, he discovers his new next door neighbor is none other than Danny, who invites him over. Axel panics and hangs up.

Back at the police station, the lieutenant sends Michael and Axel on a very special assignment to infiltrate a ring of "high-class callboys." Axel and Michael, very hot in tuxedos, are sent to a party filled with equally hot guys. Mitch Taylor is the “madam” of the ring, but his chauffeur, Johnny Rahm, is suspicious of the two newcomers. So Mitch decides to test them. Sitting in the back of Mitch’s limo, with Johnny filming, Mitch makes our two heroes strip. At this point, director Douglass delivers what is, in my humble opinion, one of the hottest single shots in all of porn; the two guys, sitting side by side, wearing nothing but black bow ties, slowly rubbing their large, hairy, hardening cocks. It’s amazing. To not make Mitch suspicious, Michael blows Axel, working up and down the huge cock with aplomb. It’s easy to tell Michael enjoys sucking Mr. Garret‘s huge blonde cock, because there are several close-ups of Michael‘s dripping pre-cum that pools all over his own leg.

The quartet returns to Mitch's bordello where they all get in the act. Johnny watches, continues filming, and jacks-off. Mitch blows Axel, then slithers underneath Axel to lick his balls, telling Michael to blow Axel at the same time. Mitch then parts Axel's cheeks and sticks his tongue in the blonde ass-hole, and it’s all shot beautifully up close. It’s a stunningly erotic rim-job, and Axel’s blonde, fuzzy ass has never looked so fine. Axel is sent to a dresser drawer for a condom and discovers a stash of drugs, but keeps it to himself. Axel is made to fuck Mitch but Mr. Garret slams so hard and fast into Mitch that he has to tell him to take it slower. With Axel still fucking, Johnny cums on Michael's chest, followed by an explosive spooge from Michael. The chain of cum continues with Axel delivering his blast, one that coats Mitch, Michael and all the linens in sight. Tragically, Mitch Taylor’s performance is the only disappointment in this otherwise unforgettable film. He never gets it up and he certainly never cums. Oh, well.

Finally Mitch believes the hot duo are really callboys and leaves them alone, telling Axel he can't wait for a piece of his ass. Axel reveals the huge stash of drugs, but Michael wants to sell on the street and retire. A smarter Axel escapes with all the drugs, the videotape Johnny made, and a laptop with a list of clients. However, Axel is unsure what to do, so in desperation calls Danny and they go jogging together to discuss options. Danny tells him to toss the drugs and the computer, take the tape of Michael and Chad to the boss, and use the other tapes for his own self-pleasure.

In a secluded, wooded area, the guys stop running to rest, and share a romantic, tension filled look deep into each others’ eyes. Although hesitant, Axel finally releases his huge hard-on from his red running shorts, inviting Danny to suck it. Danny turns in a wonderful, memorable suck. Before long, Axel agrees to fuck Danny even though it seems he's bursting with confusion. The guys fuck quickly before beating-off together. Danny has a creamy load, and then Axel shoots one of his famous, voluminous cum squirts. Danny wants desperately to kiss Axel (there hasn't been one kiss so far in the video) telling him "a man's tongue can be a wonderful thing." They kiss and it's an absolutely beautiful moment and a spectacular end to the film.

AXEL & DANNY IN THE PARK

With a wonderfully complex, layered story, director Douglas packs a hell of a lot of subtext and intriguing ideas into one film. The sex is truly hot and occasionally very nasty. Between Douglas’ masterful writing and direction, scene stealing moments from Danny Sommers and Chad Knight, not to mention Axel Garret and Michael Brawn’s acting and sexual performances, Kiss-Off is one very special adult video.

This is Must See Porn. Don’t miss it

The Rockets' Red Glare

2006-07-04T18:46:00.000-07:00

I love costume dramas, and I don’t mean common ones like Pride and Prejudice or Tom Jones. I like hard-core porn costume dramas. Private’s Gladiator and Goya, Rocco Sifreddi’s Immortal, and gay classics like Centurions of Rome get me off in no time at all. I think it’s very hot to see lavish, well designed and build period costumes lifted, ripped and shed allowing us to view historical characters sucking and fucking. It always kind of throws me when, in gay porn, condoms suddenly appear on hard cocks. I understand there are safety issues, but I would be truly surprised if Nero or Billy the Kid really used rubbers.

Today being Independence Day here in the US, I got thinking about the porn films I’ve seen dealing the birth of our great country. I thought about it a lot. A lot. And I didn’t come up with anything. Not anything, not one video. I can not recall seeing George Washington or Thomas Jefferson or Aaron Burr or even King George III getting a blow job from a private in the Continental Army, or, wig askew, fucking Betsy Ross up the ass-hole with their fully erect and pre-cum dripping flag-pole.

There is one scene, kind of. In the 1981 straight classic Pandora’s Mirror, the great Veronica Hart finds an amazing mirror in an antique store and decides she must have it. The owner won't sell, claiming it's possessed. Finally, he allows her to "borrow" it for a few days. When she gets it home, she stares into the mirror and witnesses a variety of costumed sex scenes throughout many different periods. The very hot cast includes Kandi Barbour, Merle Michaels, a very young, very muscular Jerry Butler, George Payne, Tiffany Clark, Jamie Gillis, Annie Sprinkle, Carter Stevens, Hillary Summers and Marlene Willoughby.

One of the scenes Ms Hart watches in the mirror takes place during the war for Independence. A busty young slave is in the barn feeding the chickens when three very sexy, very handsome Red Coats (played by actors I don’t recognize) arrive, grabbing the beautiful young woman and fucking her, forcing their cocks into her waiting mouth, culminating in a terrific cum splattered gang-bang. The scene takes place in the correct decade, but it really doesn’t have anything to do with The Declaration of Independence or The Bill of Rights. Close, but no cigar.

Do the absence of Revolutionary War porn films indicate there is no audience for stroking material set in this period? Or have these figures, our fore-fathers from history, become so idealized, so worshiped, so God-like that adult producers are afraid to make them sexual beings? I don’t know, but I think a porn movie about the birth of America could be quite entertaining, not to mention really hot and sexy. I’ll keep waiting, but I have a feeling I’ll still be waiting quite a few Fourth of Julys from now.

An Old Yahoo

2006-07-01T13:58:00.000-07:00

Now that I’m back home with my computer, I’ve been slowly wading through hundreds of emails from the over 600 Yahoo Porn Groups I belong to. Now, I don’t get emails from all those groups, just the 50 or so that cover the subjects I really love, subjects like hot male stars from straight porn, vintage pictures of guys that are either naked or wearing only posing straps, and hairy guys with lots of chest and pubic hair. I love these things and a lot of others, and the Yahoo Groups deliver in spades.

As for the other 550 or so clubs I belong to, I’ve set the controls to “Read On Web Only.” That means I can still check out hot pictures and video clips, I just don’t get the daily email porn, gathered and delivered by faithful club members who are as equally devoted to the topic -- and in some cases, much more devoted to the topic -- than I am. I enjoy visiting these clubs from time to time, checking in to see which porn whore one hot man-slut has been fucking up the ass, or if that certian sex stud is still (sadly) shaving his chest and cock hair. Sure, I belong to some really odd clubs, clubs I joined just to see “what the fuck is that?” I admit, for example, I belong to Crucified Males (Guys into being crucified naked -- Really.) And I've even started a couple clubs, like the fanb site for my porn namesake Axel Garret (the link is to your left.) But it’s what appears in my mail box, from the clubs I’ve chosen to deliver daily emails, that get’s my dick up and seeping.

Be warned, you can’t have a wimpy email server. Some days I receive two or three messages from a group. But the next day I might get 150. And you put 20 or 30 really active groups together and suddenly you can have 400 emails all arriving on one day. You have to have a little free time to get through all the porn being thrown at you. Not that I’m complaining, I’m not. It’s all free, and where else can you find that much free porn all coming at you day after day after day?

There are other companies that have their own groups as well, MSN and Google chief among them, but Yahoo, I think, is the best. I don’t know if it was the first to come up with this concept, it was the first I found, but they seem to lead the way.

Other than huge amounts of emails landing in your inbox, there are a couple of other down sides to the Yahoo Groups. Members of the clubs love to argue with each other in the rudest possible ways, and it always seems someone has their feelings hurt or are off licking their wounds from some thoughtless comment. And occasionally a virus works its way into the group and can spread amazingly quickly. You have to careful, but where in the web don’t you have to be careful?

The last couple of nights I’ve been up late, visiting clubs and sorting through my emails. I’ve stayed up way too late, and had way too much fun. My cock is a little sore, if you know what I mean. But it’s easy to enjoy, and easier to get off with the help of these nasty, fetish inducing sites. I think they’re just great.

A few of my favorites clubs -- and a few of the pictures they’ve slipped into my inbox -- are below. If you aren’t already a fan of Yahoo Groups, check them out. You won’t be sorry.

Vintage photos from the 40s, 50s and 60s
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/v-m-p/

Hairy guys at Hairy Males
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/hairymales/

Your favorite male porn stars from the classic days of hardcore
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/classicmalepornstars/

Straight Male Porn Star Exchange
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/smpXchange/

Not bad, huh? Get over to Yahoo, get your pants open, and start getting off to all those free pictures. What more could you ask for?

Getting My Grip Back In Shape

2006-06-29T12:51:00.000-07:00

I’m back from my very long business trip and have really missed doing what I enjoy most; whacking to hot porn and reporting what I’ve seen to you, my loyal readers. I’ve been back home for a couple days and so far have mostly been surfing the web, looking for hot men and women fucking and sucking. It’s been fun, although I haven’t focused on any one thing really. I'm sort of reacquainting myself with what's out there in the cyber-porn world. I’ve also spent a lot of time going through my emails, most originating from Yahoo Groups (I belong to over 600 porn groups at Yahoo … Yeah, I know … It’s a little obsessive.)

As soon as I can I’ll be more fully exploring a few web sites, as well as sitting down, opening my pants, and having a good look at some new, hot videos. Fear not, Axel is back and ready to return to our favorite spectator sport -- porning!

I'll Be Back ... Soon!

2006-06-14T15:45:00.000-07:00

I'm so sorry I haven't written in a couple months. I've been away from home on business, and away from my computer. But I'll finally be back in a couple weeks with lots of new porning adventures to talk about. I haven't forgotten you, and I haven't been idol.

See you then!

Possible Porn Star Sighting

2006-03-30T19:47:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I went to lunch at a trendy bistro with a couple of my coworkers. We were in a booth chatting when three people arrived and were seated next to us. I was facing the door when they made their entrance and immediately found one of them strangely familiar. I couldn’t place him, but somehow I knew I knew him. A feature film is currently being filmed in town, so at first I thought it might be a familiar supporting player or even a movie star I couldn’t quite place. He was tall, very muscular and, I would guess, around 45. He had naturally blonde hair that had been frosted even blonder on the top. His face was slightly more aged than I was used to, but he was someone I had seen before, I felt certain.

The man and woman accompanying him were much younger than he. I suppose they were in their early twenties and both quite attractive. The three of them sat in the booth behind my coworkers with the blonde guy facing me, so I was looking at his face full on. It occurred to me in a flash that this might in fact be straight porn star Brick Majors.

Brick Majors

That startled me quite a bit. I kept sneaking glances at the guy, trying not to catch his eye or to make him think I was cruising him. Every time we was involved in chatting with the younger couple, I studied his face as best I could. Majors, never one of my favorite porn stars, was a standard fixture in adult films ten years ago, but I would often fast-forward through his scenes. Sure, he was a beefed up muscle stud, but I always found him uncompelling and often kind of a dull fucker.

Mr. Majors in Action

But, he was a nineties porn icon, and so his face (if not his cock) is burned into my memory. Looking at this guy, I became convinced I was looking directly at the famed Brick. His face had weathered a little, but it was still the same, the bizarrely tinted hair was the same, and the fake tan was exactly the same.

To answer your obvious question, no, I did not approach him to discover if my identification facilities were on target or not. I mean, what if it wasn’t him? What would I have said? How can I ask a complete stranger, "Are you a washed-up porn stud from ten years ago?" I’ll never know if Brick Majors was sitting across from me yesterday afternoon or not, but my fantasy life sure got kick-started.

The city I live in is not exactly a hub of activity, so I had to ask myself what the fuck would Brick Majors (if it was, in fact, him) be doing here? We all know there are literally limitless possible answers, but here’s the one I came up with: Warning! This explanation has no basis in fact or reality! But it does turn me on.

What if, since retiring from porn, Brick has become an escort specializing in servicing couples? What if the young people he was with at the restaurant wanted to spruce up their sex life and so, after scouring the online swingers ads, had rented an experienced and famous porn star to help them out with their first jealousy and guilt free three-way? They flew Brick here, picked him up at the airport, and now were having a get-to-know-each-other lunch before heading back to their apartment to get naked, jump in bed together, and give the sexy young woman the first (and best) gang fucking of her life. I have to wonder if they would have been disappointed by Brick’s somewhat "older than the pictures in the advertisement" face? I don’t know. But I wish I could have been there, sitting in an armchair in their bedroom, masturbating and watching as the three of them became hot and sweaty sex pigs.

I wouldn’t have fast-forwarded through that, I swear.

Reading Between The Lays

2006-03-26T00:53:00.000-08:00

It must be apparent to anyone who reads this blog with any regularity that I’m the kind of guy who likes my porn visual. I want to see images, pictures. They can be moving or still. They can be color or black and white. They can be straight or gay. But I want my details visually. I want to see every hair and every drop of pre-cum.

So you might be surprised to learn that lately I’m starting to read sex stories online. I’m finding it incredibly erotic, and it allows my imagination to run rampant. I imagine the characters to be the hot guys I know or have run into on the street or at the gym. Even when the description doesn’t quite match up to my fantasy guy, I still use him as the star of the movie in my mind.

I should say, I suppose, that one of my first exposures to porn was literary. A school buddy let me borrow a cheap sex novel he had gotten I don’t know where. It was called Randy Young Run Away, and it was just as good as the title implies. It was a straight porn novel, but very kinky. It dealt a lot with bestiality, which when you’re young and impressionable can make quite an impact. Do all adults have sex with animals? I wondered. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get into that. I vividly remember the most disturbing description was of a woman who spread her legs, allowing a snake to crawl inside her, where (and I quote) "… it was never seen again." Well, that right there was enough to put me off women for the rest of my life!

When I was eleven or twelve I found a book called The Happy Hustler. I don’t recall the author’s name (and if you know it, please tell me. I’d love to get another copy and reread it.) It was the male version of Xaviera Hollander’s best seller The Happy Hooker. Like Ms Hollander’s tome it was autobiographical, telling the life-story of a young, attractive bisexual man (the author) who worked his way up from hungry street hustler to owning and running his own all-male whorehouse with a clientele of the rich and famous of both genders. He made his sex-filled lifestyle sound glamorous and desirable. I loved it and read the sex passages over and over, repeatedly beating-off to them. That book was so hot, inspiring my young libido. One evening I found out the author was to be the featured guest on The Tomorrow Show, Tom Snyder’s late night gab-fest. I have no memory of the kind of excuse I came up with that allowed me to stay up until two AM on a school night to watch that, but my mother permitted it. She had to have known what I was into even then. Needless to say the television show’s discussion was much tamer than what I had been reading in the book, but once I saw the cute guy who had penned it, I jacked-off to my fantasy of him for months to come.

A few years later I started going to porn theatres and found my bliss. I stopped reading porn.

So even I was surprised when a couple months ago I stumbled on two text-based websites with no pictures, and I was getting off to them. Solo Touch (http://www.solotouch.com/home.php) is all about choking the chicken. It encourages readers to write in with their masturbation techniques, ideas, and most importantly to me, their stories. The anecdotal section is divided into three parts; Women and their adventures (yeah … who cares?); Men alone (often fairly hot); and men with other men (very, very hot!) It’s kind of surprising how many guys who identify as straight have and do jack-off with their buddies. So much happens around us that we don’t realize. I find Solo Touch very hot reading.

The other site is much kinkier. Calling itself Sex Stories Text Repository (http://www.asstr.org/main.html), this is a porn reader’s Nirvana. There are hundreds of stories here, some spread over many chapters. Anything you’re looking for, you’re going to find here, and probably a whole lot you weren’t looking for. One of the features I love is each entry has its own coded reference key. There is an area explaining what goes on in the piece you’re about to read. MM (gay male fun), MF (straight sex), FF (lesbian), Orgy, Rape, Incest, Pedophilia, you name it. You can find dozens of entries by dozens of authors describing in detail the thing that most turns you on. And most stories contain several topics. Mix and match, allow your fetishes to combine all in the same piece. My only complaint about this site, and it’s a small one, is a lot of the writings are quite long, longer than I have time for when I want a quick whack before heading off to bed. But you might really like that aspect of them, if you’re into the idea of a nasty and hot sex story roughly the length of Moby Dick.

Now don’t worry. Sure, I like reading these hot narratives, but I’m not giving up movies and pictures, you know me better than that. However these two stroke-sites have expanded my voyeuristic horizons somewhat. And I’m enjoying finding a new variant of what turns me on and gets me off.

(Kid) Rock My World

2006-03-25T23:23:00.001-08:00

I recently wrote a blog entry about celebrity sex tapes, questioning why anyone would make one, or why they would be surprised when the tapes would be unscrupulously released to the general public. Newsweek Magazine wondered the same things. They spoke to ex-Creed lead singer Scott Stapp, whose 1999 romp with four girls and Kid Rock recently hit the net. He and Rock went to court and won a temporary order preventing World Wide Red Light District from distributing or promoting the video. Red Light, infamous for their sale of Paris Hilton’s sex tape in 2004, had leaked a 40-second preview clip of the video to the web. The company has acknowledged that the tape came from a third party, but has denied that it was stolen as Stapp has claimed.

Stapp believes the release of the sex video is intended to sabotage him. "Obviously someone wants to hurt me and doesn’t want me to be successful in my solo career," he said. "You think it’s part of your rock ’n’ roll memories," he continued. "I should have burned that tape." Uh, yeah.

Kid Rock was a little more philosophical about the whole thing when Newsweek asked him about the video. I quote at length:

Reporter: I take it that this sex tape scandal is not a positive thing in your life?
Rock: I don't know what to do with it. It's something I'm definitely not proud of, but I'm not embarrassed by it either. It's rock and roll, and it goes on. If I've gotta a carry that flag ..."
Reporter: This does look like the ultimate publicity stunt—the tape drops just as your new album drops.
Rock: I know. But really, I'm not that calculated. It's very lame that it got out. And it’s very lame that Scott is blaming it on someone "sabotaging" his career. It's like, it's your tape, idiot! I'm holding him responsible for it ... Well, it's my responsibility, too. But I was a little caught up at the time. My mind was in other places.
Reporter: How have your fans reacted?
Rock: They've said, "I'm not really shocked you were in a video having sex with four girls. I'm not surprised that someone got it on tape. But, man—what the hell were you doing hanging out with Scott Stapp?"
Reporter: It is pretty hard to tarnish your image.
Rock: I'm a nice person. I am. I'm not rude. I think you’ll see in that 40-second clip: he walks in like, "Scott Stapp. King!" I walk in like, "Hi, I'm Bob."
Reporter: I'm only surprised, given your reputation, that something like this didn't happen sooner.
Rock: No, it's not my thing. I'm not into videos. But it was my own fault for getting involved. I can guarantee I wasn't sober at the time.
Reporter: You had to know that someday this tape was going to surface.
Rock: I hadn't thought about it until the day it leaked on the Web. Then I thought of the company I was gonna be in, and I was like, "Oh God!" The whole Paris Hilton thing. I'm not saying I'm better than them, it's just not where I wanna be.

I guess naiveté knows all types of people, and not fame nor celebrity nor wealth can escape its grasp. Too bad for them. But it makes it fun for us. Now if I could just lay my hands on a montage or capture or two from that tape. I know I’d like to see just what exactly they were up to.

Guys' Size Sighs

2006-03-22T23:01:00.000-08:00

A friend wrote and asked if, by looking at the pictures I posted three days ago, I could guess how big Colin Farrell’s cock was. I examined the montage again (even closer this time) and I'm guessing about 7 inches long. Thickness, of course, is very difficult to judge. I’m guessing that length because of the shot with his hand holding his upright cock from the base. To be frank, I'm about 7 inches myself and let's just say the picture looks fairly familiar.

I mean, look at the picture of Erik Everhard fucking the chick in the US vs Europe post from two days ago. Yes, he looks stunningly well hung, and I truly believe he is. But it's always difficult to tell. He could have six inches, but if he is only 5 foot one, a six inch cock is going to look huge. I've read that porn producers like casting shortish guys just so their dicks look bigger. So who knows. May I say in his defense, however, even if Mr. Everhard is a midget, it appears to me he still possesses a massive member.

What do you think? Do you believe Erik is overwhelmingly well-hung? What size would you guess Colin’s cock is? Write in, post your comments. Let us know what you think. There will be a prize for the winner. And that prize will be … having the opportunity to discover in person if they are right or not. But I at least have to be able to watch!

Arcade (The Movie)

2006-03-21T00:05:00.000-08:00

It’s no secret to anyone who knows me or who reads this blog that I’m drawn to classic gay porn (and classic straight porn too, but last night the classic porn was gay.) And so just before bed last night I pulled out a VHS tape I haven’t watched in a couple years – something I love doing. Sure, I can always kinda remember the next scene that's coming up (and cumming up), but not distinctly. It’s almost like watching fresh new porn, or at least reminiscing about some favorite flick from the dim memory of my youth.

Last night’s classic is titled Arcade. Produced by West American Films in 1984 (now distributed by HIS Video) and directed by Jim West, this movie has less of a plot and more of a premise. A hot young guy (played by astounding blonde hottie Eric Stryker) takes a sensuous shower, popping out only to answer the telephone. A friend is calling asking about a drink, but naked Eric explains he is going out alone for a night on the town. He finishes his preparations for the evening by smearing his body with baby oil.

In reality, he is visiting the local Porn Arcade where the filthy films are always playing and the man-on-man action is always nasty. As hot as the fantasy is (and it’s very hot) director West offers a few dashes of reality. A security guard, played by Nick Rodgers (looking not unlike Freddie Mercury) tries to interrupt and intercept as many inter-booth liaisons as he possibly can. We’ve all had experiences with these guys, haven’t we? But as Eric travels from booth to booth, he discovers hot movies by plugging a quarter at a time, and juicy glory holes whenever he looks down.

Stryker plays a rousing game of glory hole hide and seek with married businessman Kevin Hunt, finally getting a big mouthful of cock. Then Latino jock Jose Castoire plows Eric’s ass as they watch a "Quarter Quickie" of masculine Zed Michaels beating-off and shooting cock-snot all over his Harley. Eric really has fun as he takes an aggressive fucking from a Marine in camouflage, played by Phillip Todd. In the end, Stryker and the other fun-loving habitués of the arcade get pissed off at Rodgers for his constant interruptions. They hold him down, tie him up and gang bang him on the floor in the middle of the arcade’s hallway. After his initial protestations, Rodgers proves to have an expert ass, moaning with the kind of pleasure only known to power bottoms being gang fucked. It is very, very hot.

The Stunning Mr. Stryker

The indisputable star of this flick is Eric Stryker. Blue-eyed, blonde, muscular, and hung he is extraordinary here. Sadly he died in 1988 at the far too early age of 33, but he still made a huge impact on the gay adult film industry. He appeared in over 55 classic strokers, including A Matter Of Size, Asian Knights, Lovers & Friends, Bathhouse Fantasies, Student Bodies, Good Hot Stuff, and Rawhide. He never failed to be hot, to produce memorable sex, or to look less than fuckable.

Arcade is a pre-condom classic, so all fucking is bareback. It clocks in at a brisk 72 minutes. Most importantly, it heavily features oral sex, so if you’re a fan of blow-jobs, glory holes, group sucking, and big jizz loads, you’ll want to get your hands on a copy as soon as possible. And, I promise, once you’ve gotten your hands on it, you’ll be getting them on something you are far more intimate with.

US Vs Europe

2006-03-20T00:13:00.000-08:00

No, this isn’t about President Bush and the French. It’s about a recent blog entry I posted that sparked an interesting conversation centering on the difference between American and European straight male porn stars. I said I felt the Euro-Studs are less inhibited, less homophobic, and much hotter than their American brethren. Several readers disagreed, saying they thought both groups were roughly the same when it came to sexual attitudes. One reader brought up the wonderful Anabolic gang-bang flicks to illustrate the point that US guys aren’t uncomfortable around each other while naked and fucking. All excellent, well reasoned, intelligent points.

Today, however, I was reading a fascinating interview with one of the Good Ol’ U.S. of A.’s biggest (and I mean that in every sense of the word) straight boy porn studs, Erik Everhard. It was an engaging description of his entrance into adult entertainment, what he loves about fucking for a living, and his current activities. He’s a hot stud, and the interview really supports the rumors I’d read elsewhere that he is a decent, warm, down-to-earth kind of guy. If you’re not sure who Everhard is … well, here’s a few reminders.

Erik Everhard (Too Cute)

An Everhard Ad (Equally Too Cute)

Erik Doing What He Does Best (Too Hot)

Near the end of his interview, Everhard is asked to comment on the very topic I brought up on this blog last month. Here are his thoughts.

Question: How do you think the American performers stack up against the Europeans?
Erik: I would say that there are more consistent performers in Europe right now. There are just more guys willing to step up to the plate. That might be the North American, Bible Belt attitude towards this business. Guys think about the long term stigma here, where in Europe they just jump right in.
Question: Do you think there is a great performance fear here?
Erik: I don’t know. I really can’t relate to that. I don’t know about you, but I’ve never struggled in private so failure has never been a concern for me. I can think of maybe three bad scenes I’ve done, but I have never failed to complete a scene.
Question: How many scenes have you done?
Erik: Around six or seven hundred so far.

(If you would like to read Erik Everhard’s interview in its entirety, check it out at http://www.rogreviews.com/interviews/Erik_Everhard.asp )

I’m not quoting this to try to prove I’m right, or to give a "Nee-der, Nee-der, Nee-der" to those intelligent and insightful readers who wrote in defending American fuck-studs. I just thought it was an interesting side-note to an entertaining discussion we’d been having here.

And, please, click on comments and let us know your opinion! I’d love to hear you weigh in on what has become the Porn Watcher Sexual Olympics: America Vs. All of Europe!

Colin & The Cameraman

2006-03-19T12:57:00.000-08:00

What’s the deal? What makes a major Hollywood star decide it’s a good idea to film themselves having sex? Do they honestly think these tapes are going to stay private, that they aren’t going to somehow make it out to the general public? The Paparazzi is too pervasive and too powerful. We all know they can find anything they want. Let’s face it, if you’re a star, there is no way of hiding, so why make it even easier for the scum-bag reporters by committing your cock to film?

This isn’t a new phenomenon. For years there have been rumors of 8mm films floating around featuring stars like Rock Hudson, Tab Hunter, Marlene Detrick, Joan Crawford, and even Rudolph Valintino getting it on with their loved ones (or whomever.) But it wasn’t until the "Rob Lowe Fucks Underage Girls" video that seeing star’s sex lives live became big news and bigger money.

The internet has had a lot to do with the proliferation of these videos, of course. Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson "produced" perhaps the most famous example, but we’ve also seen Tonya Harding and Jeff Gillooly's so-called "Wedding Night Tape," and, need I mention Paris Hilton and … well, most everybody. And now we hear Kid Rock and Scott Stapp have filmed themselves in the middle of an orgy with four girls.

I’m not complaining about stars getting laid, mind you. If I had the fame and the money to indulge in these kinds of activities, you can bet your ass I’d be doing it. I might even film it. But come on, I’m not dependent on public opinion for my living. I just have to wonder why these stars think they can get away with it.

Another new tape on the web right now is of super hunky Colin Farrell fucking his girlfriend, a former Playboy Playmate. He looks hot in the home-made tape. His head is shaved (I suppose for some movie) and he is buffed up. His cock is huge (as we’ve all always hoped) and he eats and fucks pussy with the same gusto as the best porn stars alive. Some inventive web browser created a montage of screen captures from the Farrell tape and sent it to me. So, here it is, my gift to you.

Mr. Farrell and Friend

I have to believe Colin must have known when he filmed this that people like me would be posting it. Didn’t he?

If you'd like to see a sharper version of the Farrell montage, email me at axelg58@hotmail.com and I'll be glad to shoot one off to you. It's very clear ... if you know what I mean.

Go-Go No-No

2006-03-15T21:53:00.000-08:00

You know, sometimes fantasy is better than the real thing.

During my recent New York business excursion, a friend took me to XL, a gay bar in Chelsea. It’s a trendy, fairly classy establishment. Now in fairness, the eight stalls in the men’s room are all slightly larger than most handicap accessible bathrooms. And they have complete doors – that is to say, once the door is closed no one can see anything inside the stall. I mentioned to my friend that a men’s room built for sex was kind of sleazy in a very fun way. He told me that later that night he would take me to the East Village so I could experience what he called, "A truly sleazy gay club." When I asked just how sleazy we’re talking here, he told me the last time he had patronized the place in question there were hot go-go boys dancing naked on the bar sporting hard-ons, two separate circle-jerks in darkened corners, and several people engaged in an orgy in coat-check room in the basement. Needless to say, I was thrilled with the idea.

The bar is called The Cock just above Houston Street in Alphabet City. There was a ten dollar cover charge, and with that you got one drink. Upon entering we were told to put our wallets in our front pockets, not to leave our drinks unattended and to have a good time. I was planning on it.

Now you have to understand, I’m not a naive hick here. I’ve been to some sleazy, dark bars in my life, including a wonderful joint called the Water Works I used to love in New York’s upper West Side. One of my favorite Seattle gay bars is The Eagle, with its hard-core porn projected on the big screen (of course I like that), its hanging leather sling and, best of all, the barber chair, in which, any occupant is ensured a quick blow-job.

Still The Cock may be the darkest bar I’ve ever been in. There was a rotating mirror ball hanging from the ceiling, with two red gelled spot lights carelessly aimed towards it. This is the sole light source for the entire place. There is one medium-sized room, and this night it was packed with men of all ages and sizes and types.

Sadly no one was having sex with anyone while we were there. There was that quiet, forlorn, frustrated desperation that comes from guys longing to do something dirty, but not having the guts to go for it. In the basement coat-check pit (I can’t really call it a room) all that was being checked out were the coats. I was sorely disappointed, and not paying much attention when my buddy suddenly said, "Okay, here we go." I looked up to see two young men dancing on bar. Both wore cowboy boots and bikini underwear and nothing else.

That reinstated my interest. The boys danced acceptably but without imagination. One had been practicing his high kicks. I know because that’s almost all he did. I worked my way through the sweaty throng to get a better look at the go-go boys, since in the gloomy light any discernable features were dim at best. What a disappointment! They were way too skinny, had not seen a gym since junior high, were very unattractive, and resembled the worst sixth-rate strung-out street hustler you’ve ever seen (which they very easily could have been.) They danced for almost an hour, pulling their shorts down to expose their asses and pubes, but never their cocks. I kept waiting and hoping, but to no avail.

Guys were tipping them and when they did I noticed most would squeeze the dancer's baskets. Well, since nothing interesting was going on, I thought I’d give that a try. I took a bill out of my front pocketed wallet, got the attention of one of the boys and pushed the money under the waistband of his Hanes. The familiar sensation of trimmed pubes traveled across my fingers, and so I went for it. I squeezed the package. More disappointment! I know of a lot of hung guys who, when flaccid, have fairly small dicks, but this guy had almost nothing. I might as well have been feeling up a nine year old. No wonder he wouldn’t drop his undies. And worst of all, it cost me a dollar to discover this.

My friend apologized for the disastrous evening, claiming The Cock had been so much more fun when he'd visited before. It was late and so we returned to his apartment where I was staying. If it had been earlier in the evening we would have tried a couple other bars. I’ve since been told the clubs with the truly hot boy dancers are places like The Urge (right next door to The Cock), The Slide, The Boy’s Room, The Tool Box, Siberia Saturdays and, yes, XL, the bar where we had started our drinking adventure that afternoon. Oh, well. I’ll hit them next time I’m in The Big Apple.

And until then, I’m back to my go-go boy fantasy. And that’s just fine. After all, it never fails to be hot or to get me off. And the boys are so much better looking.

The Good, The Bad & The Nasty

2006-03-14T21:43:00.000-08:00

I’ve watched two more of my Manhattan purchased movies. One was pretty good, the other did absolutely nothing for me. It’s always a roll of the dice when you buy porn you haven’t seen, isn’t it? With these two I won one and lost the other.

1987’s Little Miss Innocence is a complete wash out. It’s a well known fact (at least by readers of this blog) that I like group sex scenes, particularily with multiple men involved. I had a bad feeling about this one, directed by David McCabe, from the opening credits. The film has a cast of three – not three stars – three people. And only one is a man. Now that man is Eric Edwards, who, when he was first working (and I was first going to adult theatres) was one of my favorite straight male porn stars. I made a point to find out which films he appeared in, and I went to see them. But times – and my tastes – seem to have changed, and Eric comes across now as slightly vanilla and uninteresting. His cock is good sized but not huge, his body is fine but not spectacular, and his fucking reliable but not memorable.

In Little Miss Innocence, Sheri St. Claire and Summer Rose arrive at Eric’s Hollywood mansion uninvited and move in. They decide they both like him and start fucking him, separately and together. They wake him up in the middle of the night to fuck. They grab him on his way to work to fuck. They fuck him so much in fact, he becomes dissipated and unable to function. Finally they leave him naked on the kitchen floor, begging for mercy.

Straight boy fantasy? Two girls who want to have sex more than you do? You bet your ass that’s what it is. There’s nothing wrong with porn movies that facilitate the fantasies of their audience, but at least throw a couple other guys into the mix. Couldn’t Eric have had some buddies who wanted to come over and get some? Anyway, the performances are fine, the cinematography very good, the performers attractive, but my cock didn’t stay hard. Axel loses that dice roll.

However, Axel won the next throw. Private’s 1995 epic The Kissing Fields is very hot, even though, atypical for Private, there is no orgy sequence. There’s a four-way, but no proper orgy. But that’s okay, the sex is hot, the boys hotter, and the facial and oral cum shots plentiful.

Sexy and hung African-American Sean Michaels stars as a secret agent undercover (and under the covers) in the Caribbean fucking his way through an investigation. The plot is a little more detailed than that, but really, that’s all you need to know. The ladies, including Brigite Aime, Kasandra and Zana Sun, are all sexy. Sean and Joey Verducci are the male stars, and together and separately they appear in every scene, including two additional cut three-way sequences that show up in Special Features. Verducci has never done much for me, but he is well photographed here (direction is credited to Max Steiner), and his cock is large, as is his splattering loads of man cream.

One scene features the legendary John Dough, a nasty, hairy sex machine who can’t get enough pussy and has one of the filthiest mouths in the adult industry. I love him. He performs in the four-way spectacularly. In my opinion, he is under appreciated and (was) under used. When I catch him in a video, I always wish I could see more. I’ve read he is still active in the porn biz, but now mostly directs. Someone should reissue all of his movies in a single set. I know I’d be in line to buy them.

The Amazing John Dough

So, all in all, The Kissing Fields is one hot fucking straight porn flick. See it if you can. And Little Miss Innocence? Well, see it if you dare – dare to fall asleep that is.

One Sweet Swede

2006-03-11T13:58:00.000-08:00

Sex Around the World: Sweden 2 is the first movie I’ve watched of the five I bought during my New York trip. If you read this blog with any regularity, you know I love European porn, and this video is a pretty good example of their style of adult cinema.

The DVD contains five sequences, some hotter than others, one stunningly sexy. Scene one is a masturbation sequence featuring a girl on a sports car with a jelly dildo. You know how I feel about scenes like these. Yawn. I know the straight boys love them, but, like lesbian scenes, it’s Fast Forward time for me. This is followed, however, by the hottest sequence in the movie, and one of the hottest sequences I’ve seen anywhere in quite some time. A woman in her bathtub is playing with her pussy when the single sexiest man I've seen in straight porn in a while appears naked and they go at it. His name is Jiri Kache and he is a big, muscular, hung Swede, who, in my humble opinion, really, really needs to come to my house for a dose of good old fashioned man love. This guy is amazing, remember his name – Jiri Kache – and look for his movies. Here are a few stills from Sweden 2 featuring him.

Stunning, huh? I think he’s unbelievable, and I can’t wait to see more of him, his big cock, and his massive cum loads.

The other scenes in the film are fine, but pale following the appearance of Kache. A woman fucks a faceless guy in a suit. We only see his face at the money shot, and it’s a truly disappointing face. Big load of jizz though. There’s another two-way with a muscular black Swede – something of an ethnic surprise – and a three-way with two ladies and a guy with a video camera, who … well, unfortunatly you can guess what they do. It isn't terribly imaginative.

Director Jon Yuma makes a common artistic mistake that has irritated me for years. He tries to turn hot porn into an artistic statement. Sweden 2 features bold, unreal, saturated colors, lots of slow motion, swaying and dizzying handheld cameras, and soft, blurred, even unrecognizable focus attempting a hip music video look for the production. But Yuma forgets this is porn, and that we want to see the cock slamming into the cunt with clarity. We don’t need to be entertained by "hip" camera work and blurred images. We want to be entertained by imaginative sex performed by hot, athletic men and women.

This DVD is released by Anarchy Films, and is PC DVD-ROM compatible, so you can have whacking fun at your desk. The bonus features are among the best I’ve ever seen, so kudos to Anarchy for that! There’s a photo gallery, website access, and best of all, the previews. They are simply edited for the best moments of the movies they promote, all with hot cum-shots (something so many previews leave out), and best of all there are 19 – count ‘um, 19! -- of them! What’s better than almost a bonus hour of pure sex. I loved it.

Overall, Sex Around the World: Sweden 2 is a nice European porn flick, certainly strokable, with one of the hottest new guys in the biz. And don’t forget to check out the previews. They’ll provide you a cum-bath all by themselves.

The Corner Of Broadway And Porn

2006-03-07T22:28:00.000-08:00

I’ve returned from my New York business trip and I had a terrific time. But now, I’m ready to get back to watching and writing about hot, sloppy, nasty porn.

Needless to say, while in The Big Apple I made it to a couple of the Eighth Avenue porno stores, and bought five new straight DVDs I’ll be reporting on soon (Although I’ll try and watch a few of my current gay adult movies, just to mix things up.)

The New York porn shops are interesting places. DVDs and tapes are very cheap, and the peep show preview booths are intensely hot. I particularly enjoyed the buddy booths. If you’re unfamiliar with the buddy booth concept, think of a regular video booth, except you can push a button, and if the guy in the booth next to you also hits the button in his booth, a window opens up between you so you can watch each other jack-off to the movies on the screen -- or to each other. And did I mention the window between you gaps slightly at the bottom? Just enough to – Yes! – slip your cock through. Now I’m not saying I sucked any cock there, or that I got my cock sucked – I’m not saying that – I just saying it’s possible to suck cock through the window. That’s all I’m saying.

Some of you wrote and asked me to tell about my non-porn NYC adventures. Okay. I saw three shows on Broadway; the Sweeney Todd revival starring Patti LuPone (Odd production, completely re-imagined, the ten actors play their own instruments, and the staging is Brechtian, symbolic, anachronistic, and thoroughly exhilarating), the Pulitzer Prize winning Doubt with the new replacement cast featuring Dame Eileen Atkins (Not as thrilling as I thought it was going to be), and the gut-wrenchingly hilarious Dirty Rotten Scoundrels starring Jonathan Pryce (Really funny), Norbert Leo Butz (He won the Tony for this role for a reason – it’s the funniest performance I’ve ever seen on any stage), and Joanna Gleason (Always luminous.) I also made it to both Metropolitans – the Museum and the Opera. At Lincoln Center I caught Saint-Saens’ Samson et Dalila. It was something of a tepid production, but Olga Borodina’s Dalila is breathtaking and stunning. Her performance alone is worth the price of admission.

Okay, enough of all this. Now I’m heading to the DVD player with a cum-rag and my pants open. I’ll be back telling you about one of my new stroke flicks very, very soon.

Manhattan or Bust

2006-02-26T22:32:00.000-08:00

I won't be posting here at Porn Watcher for the next week or so because I'm going on a business trip to New York and will be away from my computer. I have some meetings, will be seeing a couple of Broadway shows, maybe an opera at the Met, and, hopefully, I'll secure some terrific new porn.

I may even have an adventure or two, since a good friend will be taking me to some seedy gay bars in Greenwich Village.

I promise to report everything. I'll be back in a week. Until then, keep wacking and shooting.

The Very Hot "Miss Kitty"

2006-02-23T00:21:00.000-08:00

It’s been a while since I watched any movies starring my namesake Axel Garret, so the other night I pulled out Miss Kitty’s Litter, one of his two bisexual flicks. This film may boast one of the lousiest titles in the history of porn, and that’s unfortunate since the movie is one of that same history’s hottest.

Set a hundred and twenty years ago in an anonymous Old West town, Axel is married to the local Madame (played by the voluptuous and lascivious T.J. Hart), and in the first scene fucks the shit out of her. The stars, in addition to Garret and Ms. Hart, include Alex Wilcox, Javier Duran, John Hart, Winston Love, Jack Reilly, Tina Tyler, Jose Davis, Mark Steel, Lauren Montgomery, Duncan Mills, Eric Jon and Haus Weston. Every one of them is very hot, and knows exactly what they’re doing when it comes to sucking and fucking, whether they’re fucking pussy or boy-butt.

This 1999 video was a break though of sorts for Axel. It constituted a brief comeback, his first movie following a seven year retirement. He shot the equally hot How the West was Hung, a completely gay flick, at the same time this was filmed. In earlier videos, Axel was the hung, handsome, quiet type. In Miss Kitty’s Litter, he suddenly developed a filthy mouth, which is an amazing turn on. While his Madame/wife is rimming him in the first scene, for instance, he seductively murmurs, "Yeah, lick my ass-hole with that pretty mouth." I like that. A lot.

Axel Garret

The movie sports a couple of wackable, albeit Axeless, three-ways: one involving the local sheriff, his prisoner and the prisoner’s wife who arrives with bail; the other featuring two missionaries (one of each sex) who minister to an unconscious cowboy through prayer and cocksucking.

But the most interesting sequence is a huge orgy at the cat house that fills out the last third of the film. Axel, his Madame/wife, her whore co-worker and about eight guys all go at it, the gentleman just as involved with each other as the ladies are. The sequence lasts almost half an hour, and it’s worth every minute of screen time. The sex is imaginative, carnal and very hot. In the final moments of the orgy Hart is lying across a table being fucked by Alex Wilcox while Axel kneels over her jacking-off his huge, hairy, blonde cock. He issues Wilcox orders, "Oh, yeah, fuck my wife's pussy." Axel shoots one of his trade-mark prodigious loads of sticky cum all over Hart’s tits, then Wilcox pulls his dick out and shoots his jizz-wad onto her belly, while Axel grabs his buddy’s dick, manually pumping every last ounce of goo out. As he does, Axel smiles and says, "Yeah, shoot that cum all over my wife. Shoot it." Ah, my!

Director Chi Chi LaRue produces yet another astounding film (as is How the West was Hung), raising it well above your standard porn movie of any genre, and particularly above almost every other bisexual flick ever made. Even more importantly, Ms. LaRue has a singular understanding of the beauty of Axel’s blonde, fuzzy, rock-hard cock. This video best displays it to its fullest potential and sensual beauty, and I’ve seen all of Mr. Garret’s movies and can tell you, his dick is wonderfully displayed in almost every one.

Miss Kitty’s Litter is a thoroughly hot movie. If you like Axel Garret, or bisexual films, or really good porn, or you just need an exceptionally sensational stroke session, this is a DVD you’ll want to check out, and soon.

Exposing Even More of Heath

2006-02-22T01:03:00.000-08:00

I’ve posted two of these candid pictures of Heath Ledger naked before, but here is a third I discovered in a Yahoo Group.

Now that I’ve seen Brokeback Mountain, I know these stills were taken during the filming of the scene where Ledger and Jake Gyllenhaal strip off their clothes and run to the edge of a cliff, jumping into a lake thirty or forty feet below. In the movie, this scene is filmed in an extreme long shot, although you still get a quick glimpse of Heath’s flapping cock if you watch very closely. Luckily during the filming of this scene, some industrious industry perv snapped these candid shots from a nearby vantage point. Lucky for us.

Just a side note, I did see wider versions of these pictures at yet another website, tragically forgetting to save them before completely forgetting which website I saw them on. Interestingly enough, the guy who jumps naked into the water with Heath is not Jake Gyllenhaal, but is, in fact, a body double. So what these pictures teach us is, Heath is uninhibited, exhibitionistic and definitely not Jewish.

You go for it Heath! Let’s see even more. Please!

VHS vs DVD

2006-02-21T00:27:00.000-08:00

Want to know what I miss about porn on videotape?

Before I tell you, please understand when it comes to the larger picture, of course I prefer my whacking material on DVD. The picture is crisper and clearer, and the color is terrific. The sound is fuller, more vivid, and is stunningly impressive on an expensive system. The DVDs usually contain interesting bonuses, including stills, production materials, deleted sex scenes, previews, and other fun things that aren’t available on videotape. It’s always easy to jump to a scene in the middle of the movie without fast-forwarding, then rewinding, then fast-forwarding again, back and forth for twenty minutes. And, needless to say, DVDs don’t wear out as tape does. With very little care a DVD will last, literally, forever.

So, then you must be asking, "Jeez, Axel, what is it about video tape you could possibly miss?" Easy answer: You would loan an adult videotape to a friend, or your roommate would snag one and disappear with it for an hour or so, and eventually they return it. But when they returned it, they almost always forgot to rewind it. There was something voyeuristic, something naughty about shoving that tape into a VCR, rewinding it for just a moment, and then hitting play. You would suddenly be watching the last moments your buddy was enjoying just before he turned it off. In other words, you were watching the moment that brought him to orgasm, the image that made him cum. There are few moments in life that allows you that intimately into your friends’ sexual consciousness.

And I liked that. And I miss it.

More Bi Surprises Up The Butt

2006-02-16T20:38:00.000-08:00

I recently wrote a blog post about a bisexual scene that popped up in an otherwise straight porn flick I was watching. I ended the post with this question: Can anyone think of any other straight adult films featuring bi or gay male sequences?

Well, Kevin John wrote back with an answer. He said, "Sure. Gerard Damiano's The Story of Joanna. Radley Metzger's Score, and his The Opening of Misty Beethoven features a man penetrated by a strap-on dildo. Not exactly bi but... "

Thanks Kevin John. Great finds I'll be looking for in my local porno store as soon as I can.

The Opening of Misty Beethoven is an interesting example. Does a straight guy getting fucked up the ass with a strap-on worn by a woman constitute a gay sequence? Well ... maybe. I can think of some Private films where guys get their poop-shoots stretched open by dildo-wearing chicks, and, God knows, there are many films featuring Rocco Siffredi with a finger or tongue up his ass-hole. It really makes you think, doesn't it?

I was recently in the fetish section at the local adult boutique and was looking at the vast array of strap-ons they had for sale. The packaging on these items is quite interesting. The cover of each box features a very attractive young woman standing with an equally (or more) attractive young man. The man always has his back to the camera showing his ass, looking over his shoulder with a somewhat surprised look on his face. Standing there at that moment I realized, to my great shock, that strap-on dildos are not being marketed to lesbians, but in fact are being pitched to straight couples. Straight couples with a gentleman wanting to be fucked up the ass. Just how prevalent is this in middle-class middle America? I guess there's lots of things going on in this country the religious right would rather we didn't know was going on. And apparently the religious right must be doing it as well, since there must have been thirty different types and styles available for purchase.

By the way, Kevin John told me I could share his name with all of you, as well as his e-mail address. If you'd like to discuss this further with him, write him at LiLiPUT1@aol.com

And if you'd like to continue discussing this (or any of the Porn Watcher posts) with me, you can do it right here. I look forward to hearing what you think.

My Hero & "Heroes"

2006-02-14T21:40:00.000-08:00

I have an internet friend who is just about the nicest guy in the entire world. Bob is, like myself, a porn connoisseur. Bob first e-mailed me because he read this blog and wanted to talk about porn, Axel Garret, and the joys of jacking-off while watching people fuck on-screen. As we sent e-mails back and forth I mentioned a classic gay porn video I had once seen, then forgotten the title, and so had been unable to track down since. I told him about a hot locker room scene featuring Tim Kramer I had intensely beat-off to years before.

Almost immediately Bob e-mailed me a photograph. It was the exact scene from the exact movie I had been talking about. He told me it was called Heroes, directed by Robert Walters, was produced by the Nova company in 1984, and, in addition to Kramer, also starred Rick Donovan, Jim Bentley, Lee Thompson, Cole Taylor, Cliff Ryder, Brandon Wilde, Rydar Hanson, Tony Wilde, Rob Daniels, Steve Kolis, Matt Sullivan, and Danny Connors. The cast is a who’s who of the superstars from the classic days of Nova films.

Later in the week a package arrived in the mail. Bob had sent me a DVD of Heroes (I told you he is just about the nicest guy in the entire world.) I couldn’t wait to sit down, unzip my pants, and watch it again after all those years.

I recently wrote about the DVD’s ‘preview" section which featured an ad for a straight porn-site. That is odd. But the feature presentation is nothing less than spectacular.

The premise of Heroes is fairly simple. An attractive young high school teacher assigns a writing project to his English class. "My Hero" is the subject for the essay: Who is the person each student most looks up to? Of course, his all-male class is less interested in the homework assignment than they are in each other’s cocks. One boy has pulled his dick out to show his chum at the next desk when the teacher catches him in the act, then makes him stand up to show the entire class.

The boys head home after school and one of them strips to his tidy-whities, puts on a record (remember those?) of his favorite rock star, then starts composing his essay. As we hear the song on the record player (remember those?) we see, in fantasy flashback, the star performing the song onstage. Rick Donovan plays the rock star and, I believe, actually sings the song on the sound track. Allowing this in the final cut of the movie is a major artistic mistake. Donovan is dressed in tight white trousers, red suspenders with no shirt, and a fire-engine red sweatband to hold back his hair (remember those?)

Needless to say, the young student is transported into the fantasy and enjoys hard-core, athletic sex with His Hero the rock star. As is often the case with Rick Donovan's sex scenes, keeping his titanic cock hard becomes a slight issue, but the scene is still very, very erotic. And no matter how often you see it, Donovan’s massive member always makes your mouth drop open … in both surprise and lust.

Rick Donovan

Next up is a nasty incest sequence. A young boy’s Hero is his brother away serving in the Navy. As he sits at his desk in the school library writing, he imagines his sibling in dress whites, slowly opening his pants and showing his bro his long, thick cock. Soon the sucking starts, naturally followed by the sailor butt-fucking his younger brother and cumming on his face. As the young guy writes his composition he strokes his hardening dick. Another boy is watching from across the library, but soon drops to all fours and crawls over to the oblivious young author. The second boy plunges his mouth over his friend’s cock and delivers one of adult cinema’s finest blowjobs. The two scenes, brother and brother, and brother and friend, intercut back and forth. A hot, sexy, ball-boiling sequence.

Then we get to the locker room scene I remembered so vividly from years ago. A staggeringly young Jim Bentley accompanies a friend to the locker room of his favorite baseball player, portrayed by the legendary Tim Kramer. I'm sure you can figure out exactly what happens. Nipple play, rimming, cock-sucking, butt-fucking, large loads of spurting cum, everything you’d expect to see in a high energy three-way. I could describe in detail what happens here, what I find so hot and nasty about this scene, but I wouldn’t do it justice. Trust me, this is an amazing sequence, and if this is the only part of the movie you watch, I promise it’ll get you off. Probably more than once. Maybe more than twice.

The Locker Room Scene from "Heroes"

Tim Kramer remains one of the hottest stars from gay porn’s Golden Age. He was a big blonde stud with a huge cock who seemed to be willing to do almost anything in front of a camera. I have yet to be disappointed by any performance Kramer has delivered in any film.

Tim Kramer

But there's still more to come. The film’s final sequence may be its hottest. The teacher receives the compositions written by his students but is pleasently surprised by the themes his cock-hungry, boy-slut students have written. After he dismisses the class, he retains one boy who hasn’t turned anything in. It seems out the boy is embarrassed because His Hero is the teacher. Profoundly touched, the educator makes the boy suck his stiff rod (I don’t understand it either, I’m just telling you what happens.) As the two humping sex-pigs get into some passionate lovemaking, another boy returns unseen to the classroom. He clandestinely pulls out his cock, jacking-off to the spectacle before him. Yet another student shows up, and is forcibly masturbated by the initial jacker. Eventually, they join the teacher and first boy for a hot, churning four-way. After the messy, wet finish the quartette are surprised to discover yet another student has been watching their antics. The new guy moans loudly, shooting his wad of salty jizz onto the classroom floor.

This is the type of film that defines what a classic porn flick is. Hot sex, nasty men with mind-bogglingly large dicks, and subject matter that is right on the edge of social decency. If you see Heroes on a video store shelf or you have the opportunity to rent or buy it from a porn website, grab it. You won’t be sorry.

Now I wonder what else Bob has lying around that he may no longer want …

A Mainstream Movie Weekend

2006-02-13T21:40:00.000-08:00

This doesn’t have a lot to do with porn, but I rented a main-stream movie last night that is very close to obscene (albeit hilariously funny.) In addition to seeing that film, I also caught Brokeback Mountain, which I promised in an earlier post I would report on once I'd seen it.

Well, I finally got around to it this weekend. It's an amazing, disturbing, romantic, haunting and extraordinarily depressing film. The performances are terrific, the writing and direction just great, and the cinematography unforgettable. If you’re thinking it might be hot to watch two straight stars like Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger make out, you need to know the sex scene is quick (less than a minute of screen time) and you don’t get to see any of either of the stars' goods. Sure, the kissing sequences can get a little erotic, but that isn't the point of this movie, and you'll get over any horny thoughts within the first five minutes. Truly, it’s a film no one should miss, and if you haven’t seen it, get to it this weekend, before it leaves your local cinema.

Brokeback brought a lot of my personal memories back, I have to say. I once had a relationship very similar to the one presented in the film. The guy I was dating (this was almost twenty years ago) didn't want his family or friends to know he was interested in guys. I was always introduced as a buddy. He and I were secretly together for two years (on and off), and after we parted ways he married a very nice woman who ended up killing herself. Very sad.

With Brokeback Mountain I've now seen all of this year’s Best Picture Oscar nominees. I've liked them all very much, but I have to say if I were forced to vote for one over any of the others, it would have to be Capote. Philip Seymore Hoffman is amazing and frankly I felt the film hung together as a cohesive whole better than the other four. But Brokeback would be right behind it for my vote.

Much closer to porn, I rented the filthiest documentary I’ve ever seen last night. It’s also easily the funniest. I laughed harder than I have (at anything) in the last couple years – Really! Run out and rent The Aristocrats. It features 30 or so comedians (everyone from George Carlin and Phyllis Diller to Robin Williams and Jon Stewart) telling the same joke -- the world's dirtiest. And it really is really, really dirty. If you're easily offended you won't like this film, but since you’re reading this blog I have a feeling you’ll find it as gut-wrenchingly funny as I did. I highly recommend this one for anyone who loves comedy, dirty jokes or show business in general.

Okay, there is my report on my non-porn viewing from this weekend. Now I’m going to get out my cum rag, get naked, and start doing the real work the Lord intended me to do. And then, of course, write about it for you. I’m getting hard already.

Ad Off

2006-02-10T20:51:00.000-08:00

I was rubbing one off to a gay DVD last night (The great classic Heroes – but that review is another blog entry) and when I traveled from Main Menu to Previews I was surprised that there was A) no previews for any film, but instead an ad for a sex website, and B) the ad was for a straight website.

Now I’m gay and still love straight porn, we all know that. And I’ve come to be web-friends with several gay men who enjoy jacking-off to straight porn. But I bet we’re a small minority in the gay community. Besides, last night I fast-forwarded through the ad, and I get off on boy/girl fucking. Of all the advertisements they could have added to the DVD of a classic gay porn film, they chose one with tits, pussy and big hair? Does this work for them? Have they ever gotten responses from someone who, anxious to see Tim Kramer rim Jim Bentley, just happened across a pitch for hot girl-on-girl action? Does this PR strategy pay off? Maybe, but I have trouble buying it.

These old classic films don’t have a lot of extra material for DVD special features, I understand that. Deleted scenes, alternative camera angles or out-takes just don’t exist anymore for these films. But – come on -- is it so difficult to match up DVD extras with the feature presentation? Just something in the same ballpark, something the movie’s viewer might actually be interested in, interested in seeing, and maybe even interested in purchasing. It makes sense to me, but then I’m not a porn producer or marketer. Maybe I should be. Maybe a new career lies ahead of me!

My First Gay Ol' Time

2006-02-09T21:39:00.000-08:00

I recently wrote about the first time I went to see a straight porno movie. I was thinking about it again the other day, and was remembering the first time I went to a gay porno movie.

I was dating a guy named Carl at the time. He was in the navy stationed in the town in which I lived. Carl, it turns out, kept a lot of secrets from me and from a lot of people. After we'd been dating for six months, I learned he was 18 years old, not 21 (as he'd told me) even though that's what his ID said (He had to have the fake ID, I guess, since you have to be 21 to get into a bar in Washington State. And we were often in bars together.) The other big surprise was when I discovered he was married. To a woman! That was a massive surprise, especially when the wife showed up knowing nothing about Carl or me or our cock sucking. Ah, well.

But one weekday afternoon, before the wife made her way to town, Carl and I took a trip into Seattle. I had never been to a gay porno flick, although Carl had been to many, mostly when he had been stationed in San Francisco. There was only one gay adult theatre in Seattle in the early eighties, and I'm sorry to say I've forgotten what it was called. It was on First Avenue near the waterfront. If you're Seattle literate, it was somewhere near where the art museum is located now, although the theatre was on the west side of First. Now when I pass the strip joint in that neighborhood, I often wonder if that's where the gay porn was shown.

When Carl and I arrived the theatre was between shows and in complete and total darkness. This place had not been one of the great, luxurious movie houses of the thirties. It was an old warehouse or something of that ilk, installed with stadium seating and a screen. When the projector finally purred to life the first thing Carl and I saw was a public service trailer warning the audience about unscrupulous guys trying to rob you. The short was set in the back room of a gay adult theatre where one guy walks up to another, kisses him, drops to his knees and starts sucking the standing man's cock. As he does, the sucker pulls the suckee's wallet out of his lowered jeans and pockets it. Running at about four minutes, this was the first gay porn flick I ever saw in a theatre. I had seen gay videos, of course, but this was film -- Cinema!

I've never seen another "public service" porn short since. Sure there were messeges at the end of eighties videos teaching about AIDS and condoms. But I've never heard of anything that ran in theatres, and since that time I've looked around a lot for them. I wonder if any copies of this little robbery short still exsist?

Soon it was time for the feature presentation. The film playing that day was titled Performance. I've searched for years but found little information about this movie. I have no idea who the stars were, nor do I even know when it was produced. I had this Seattle adventure somewhere around 1980 or '81, and the theatre was a "first run" house, so I'm guessing it was made around then.

The plot deals with a handsome young theatre director calling actors to appear in a play he's producing. Each of the men called just happens to be in the middle of having sex when the phone rings. One guy is even in the pool with a lover being filmed for a porn film when called to the phone.

Tragically, that afternoon I had an appointment I couldn't get out of, so Carl and I could only stay for about an hour of the film. Consequently, I have no idea how it ends. Carl was later convinced that the play the Director character was casting was Boys in the Band. I felt certain a porno movie wouldn't use the name of an actual hit Broadway play. It doesn't really matter, it was porn, I was interested in the sex, not the denouement.

If only I knew then what I know now. Although the theatre was very dark, I didn't pull my dick out to jack-off, or reach over to pull Carl's dick out to jack him off. At the time I thought it was inappropriate to do something like that with my boyfriend sitting right beside me. Carl would have loved it, and in retrospect I'm kind of surprised he didn't reach over and pull out my cock. That's the kind of thing he liked to do.

The men's room must have been somewhere behind the screen, because there was a steady stream of guys walking in and out of that area. I didn't have to take a leak during this performance of Performance, so I didn't head to the head. Now I would kill to know what was going on back there. I'm sure it was very nasty and extremely illegal. And I would have loved to have seen it. Or joined in.

That was the only time I ever went to a gay porn theatre showing 35mm film. By the time I made it to The Campus Theatre in San Francisco they were showing video porn between male strippers. And that's a very different experience.

I'd love to find a DVD of Performance and see it again. I'd like to have another look at the (as I remember it) hot sex, and to find out how the fucker ends. I also wish there were someway to discover what Carl is up to these days. I wonder if he is still with his wife. He loved it up the butt, so I wonder if she ever used a strap-on on him. I wonder if she eventually found out about his secret sex life. I wonder what would have happened if I hadn't had an appointment that afternoon, had pulled Carl's cock out of his pants, had gone back to the men's room behind the screen.

I wonder a lot of things.

Double, Double, Toil and (Big) Trouble

2006-02-04T23:15:00.000-08:00

Renting two porn flicks similar to each other at the same time is a bad idea. That’s what I did last night. Sitting on the shelf at my local porn shop was two of my favorite Euro-Smut company Private’s Pirate Fetish Machine collection. I rented them both without another thought.

Sex in a Frame and Funky Fetish Horror Show (a satire of The Rocky Horror Picture Show) are both the extremely well produced, high budget, high concept porn we’ve come to expect from our friends at Private. The sets are unusual and innovative, the lighting high-tech, the stars stunningly hot, the sex intense, the cum shots copious, and both films very easy to rub one off to.

The problem I encountered though was simple. Both flicks are amazingly similar. Produced in 2002, both are directed by one of Private’s most ingenious and artistic directors, the singularly monikered Kovi, and both featured many of the same actors, like Csoky and Steve Holmes, as well as many of the same women. Most disturbingly, however, the same fetish-wear costumes popped up in both flicks, and the same sex acts were repeated over and over and over.

I have to be honest; I’m not the biggest fetish fan in the world. It’s hard to believe I’m a vanilla boy, but in many ways I am. But, like a lot of people, I find sexy folks of both sexes wearing leather or latex or rubber to be fairly stimulating once in a while. I wouldn’t want that to be the only thing I ever saw them wear, but once in a while … you know. But to see the exact same metallic blue latex shorts on Csoky, and the same leather strapped bra on the same women in two porn films in one night became repetitive, and somehow disconcerting. I know there were probably days if not weeks between filming for the two projects, but it didn’t seem that way to me. I was still sitting in the same chair, with the same (unused) cum-rag and the same seeping hard-on. I hadn’t cleaned up between films … so, what would make me think they had? That’s a silly way to think I know, but porn is all about perception, and that’s what I perceived last night.

Now let’s talk about shoe, foot and toe licking. Both films contain tons of it. Tons of it. And it does nothing for me. In fact, it’s kind of a turn off. A guy sucking the clear plastic spiked-heal of a shoe as if he’s sucking a cock should, in theory, be sexier than fuck. I don’t find it so, and I especially don’t find it so after I’ve seen the same shoe on at least four different women. Ripping open a stocking so you can suck a woman’s toes? Count me out. Want to shove your cock under the top of a fishnet and hump away? Be my guest, but, be warned, I’m going to become bored watching you do it.

If this is your kink, if this is the thing that really gets your dick hard, I think that’s terrific. Go for it! Enjoy it! I’m certainly not judging anyone for getting off on this kind of fetish, I’m just saying it isn’t my fetish.

The scenarios for both films are pretty standard. In Sex in a Frame, a couple gets locked in a museum after hours where they and two guards keep getting magically pulled into paintings where fetish group sex is the norm. Fun is had by all.

Slightly more disappointing is Funky Fetish Horror Show. A young couple (yes, named Brad and Janet) whose car has broken down, trudge through the rain back to the local castle only to be put through their sexual paces. Steve Holmes plays the Frank N. Furter character, complete with make-up, corset, cape and fishnets. Holmes has never been one of my favorite Euro-Studs. Sure he has a massive cock, but I’ve never found him very handsome and he has a scrawny body. Anyway, as the film progresses you can guess what happens. The question I ended up asking myself was, why for the final "big-sex" scene did they decide to use only four people? There were nine or so stars used throughout the film, why weren’t they all used in a huge orgy? That would have been something.

So, today’s lesson class; don’t rent two movies that are very similar on the same evening unless you’re really, really into the subject, or fetish, or sub-genre they cover. I think I would have enjoyed both these movies separately, but together they just became much too much of a good thing.

And much too much foot sucking, too.

Bareback ... Brokeback ... Which Mountain?

2006-02-02T11:57:00.000-08:00

And I was making a joke. A couple months ago I wrote an entry about Brokeback Mountain in which I jokingly referred to it as "Bareback Mountain." "Ha, ha, ha," thought I.

Well, it’s out already. And look at the cover of the DVD, the producers found a couple gay porn stars that look amazingly like Heath and Jake.

The plot, however, seems to have nothing in common with Brokeback Mountain. Here is a story summation from MovieMountain.com: "Jason and Hunter start this rodeo with a hot suck fuck fest. No rodeo‘s complete without some riding right? Hunter yanks down his jeans and eagerly awaits Jason's cock. Jason climbs on board shoving a huge cock into Hunter's tight asshole. Fucking continues; Hunter slowly sits down on Jason's cock, riding it until he can't take it and blows a huge load. Jason blows his load all over Hunter's back, hitting Hunter in the face. Romance starts off around the pool table. Turk and Winter shoot a game of strip poker pool. Tyler Anthony watches the game. Soon they’re both naked; Winter ups the stakes, "…every time I sink something I get to do something to you." After some hot cock sucking, Winter turns Turk around, takes down his pants and says, "here, you'll want to bite down on this". Some hot ass fucking ensues; Anthony blows his load watching the action. Winter blows his hot load all over Turk’s ass and back. Turk spins around and blows his load onto his stomach and chest." You can get more information or order the film at www.moviemountain.com or http://www.pornteam.com/catalog/customer/product.php?productid=16905

One of my complaints with adult film satires of mainstream motion pictures is they make a pun on the title, copy the look of the film, and sometimes use porn actors who resemble the original stars, but they rarely follow the original plot. Of course, I realize it would be copyright infringement to follow the story exactly, but it’s a send-up, isn’t it? Why doesn’t the new plot have something in common with the source material or at least make fun of it?

All that being said, I would like to see Bareback Mountain. But at $49.95 I’ll just wait until it hits the shelf at my local porn store where I can rent it. But if you’ve seen it, I’d love to hear about it.

Taken Bi Surprise

2006-02-01T17:22:00.000-08:00

I pulled out an old tape I haven’t watched for several years last night, and it contained a sex scene I had completely forgotten, and that truly surprised me. 1987’s straight stroker, Cabaret Sin is one of the early "shot on video-tape" films, early enough that the production values are still quite high. Produced by the great Kirdy Stevens (producer of the famed Taboo series, and other classic whackers) and directed by Phillip O'Toole, Cabaret Sin takes place in the not so distant future. There has been a nuclear explosion (or something) and because no one wants the mutants to multiply, sex has been outlawed. Cabaret Sin is the government sanctioned night-club where mutants go and watch beautiful, undeformed people have sex. A private-eye (played by blonde hottie Greg Derek, even though many websites and the box cover says it is Randy West – who is nowhere to be seen in the video) goes there to investigate police corruption, and finds plenty of it.

Overall it’s a pretty good film. Trying for a Fosse-like Cabaret effect, every scene is soaked in smoke. Unfortunately, whoever was running the fog-machine let it get out of control every time anyone starts to fuck. You can still see everything, but it is sometimes hard to clearly make out what’s going on. The great Kevin James plays a half robot, half mutant cop who illegally fucks one of the performers, and although I usually find James stunningly sexy, here he is not. Because he is made-up to look like someone who’s been exposed to radiation poisoning, he isn’t anyone you’d necessarily want to jack-off to. The scene is a disappointment.

The "acts" presented at the cabaret make up most of the film’s sex scenes. It was one of these scenes that completely caught me off guard. A woman on stage is playing the trombone, and behind her are two guys playing trumpets. The three of them are swinging back and forth in unison, not unlike ZZ Top. That is, if ZZ Top didn’t have beards, wore white dinner jackets, and had no sense of rhythm. The women begins to masturbate with the trombone (to the delight of the mutant audience), and then drops to her knees, crawls over to the guys, unzips their pants, and proceeds to blow them. Presently we see the three of them naked and the sex starts in earnest.

But then something happens you just don’t see very often. In the middle of a fairly hot, if relatively ordinary, three-way, one of the men starts to suck the other guy’s cock. The scene turns into a full blown bisexual sequence in an otherwise completely straight porn flick (if you don’t count the solitary girl-on-girl scene.) One of the guys sits on the other’s face, they sixty nine while the girl watches, and then they shoot cum all over each other and her. The mutant audience is confused by what they’re witnessing, and some even boo. The movie moves on to another dialogue sequence, and the bisexuality is never referred to again.

This got me thinking (it also got me off, by the way.) We know there are damn few straight porn films that don’t contain at least one lesbian section, ‘cause you breeder boys just love that. But how many main-stream straight porn flicks have male bisexual scenes? I can think of only two others I’ve seen, albeit containing very brief moments of bi fun. A classic film I saw years ago in a porno store "preview room" titled (as I recall) Sodom and Gomorrah contained a quick moment in an orgy where one guy grabs another guy’s dick and leans down to start sucking it. I believe the guy even came in his buddy’s mouth, but it’s been a while since I’ve seen the movie, and so I couldn’t swear in court the oral money-shot moment is even in the film.

Another movie was one I rented a couple years ago. A Russian production called something like Bear Run or Bear Club or something of that nature (I remember it was from a company called Sunshine Films that produced only one other film I’ve found, a movie called Lustful Witches of the Russian Village.) The Bear film featured another orgy sequence, and again one of the guys fell to his knees and started sucking one of his male friends. There is instantly a quick edit, and suddenly we’re back to purely straight sex. (I wonder if in the European release this blow-job played out to some sort of conclusion. Europeans are a lot more open minded than we are.) These two examples are very brief moments, as opposed to the Cabaret Sin scene in which the guys are active with each other for a full six or seven minute scene.

Along the same lines, there was a Private flick I rented once (and, sorry, I’ve forgotten the title) where, in a behind-the-scenes moment, three of the well-known straight Euro-Stars are sitting on a couch together getting ready to film a scene while their female co-star is being made-up. They are wearing running shorts and feeling themselves up through the shorts, keeping hard and ready for the up-coming shoot. One of these Euro-Studs jokingly grabs and shakes another star’s hard cock through his shorts. Everyone laughs, he drops it and that’s the entire episode.

So, my questions are, how many of these "bi guy" sequences are there in straight films? And I have to wonder, how do straight boys watching a "vanilla porn flick" react when a "bi guy" scene unexpectantly springs up?

Now that’s something I’d like to hear about.

Last Night's Work Out

2006-01-28T23:58:00.000-08:00

I’ve written a lot about my passion for straight European porn, so I’m not going to drone on about it again now. But last night I jacked-off to two terrific Private Productions, Sweet Lady (Part One) and Bitches (Two titles that seem to contradict each other, now that I think about it.)

It was fun to see two Euro-porn flicks back to back. I won’t go into plot details, but they’re both cop thrillers loaded with scene after scene of nasty sex. Both of these films feature the hottest Euro-Studs, muscular sex-machines boasting huge cocks and massive loads of cum. There’s also lots of group sex, some amazing blow-jobs, and guys that aren’t afraid to be near each other or even occasionally touch. Very erotic.

Sweet Lady has one scene in particular that got me stroking harder than any other. In a smoky cabaret two women are dancing on the stage. A blonde enters the bar and starts blowing a guy at the front table. Four other guys head up to the stage and start banging the two dancers. Meanwhile a woman and two guys are fucking on the bar. So, putting it all together, we get to witness a public orgy with four women and seven guys. Fantastic! And at the end of the scene, the screen is flooded with cum, as are all the woman’s faces.

I love movies from Private, and I’m always happy to beat-off to them. And who knows, maybe tonight I’ll return for a repeat performance.

My First Porno

2006-01-23T19:27:00.000-08:00

Although it was in the later part of 1976, I remember the first time I went to a porn theatre with extreme clarity. However, my trip to Seattle's Midtown Theatre was not my first adult film experience.

I grew up in a smallish town near Seattle, and the day I turned eighteen the local family movie theatre was coincidentally showing the "adult version" of Alice in Wonderland. If you've figured out anything about me from this blog, you can easily guess how I spent the evening of my eighteenth birthday. Now you may never have seen the cinematic masterpiece that is Alice in Wonderland. It was made by porn pioneer Bill Osco, who also created the soft-core hit Flesh Gordon. Alice tells the Lewis Carroll story almost exactly, but with a lot of nudity and several sex scenes. Two versions of this film were apparently released. I rented it on videotape a couple years ago, and although it was clearly the same movie, the version I rented was much more explicit than I remember seeing all those years ago. What's shocking, of course, is the soft version (or any version) was actually playing main stream neighborhood theatres, like the one I attended. Osco knew what he was doing however. Amazingly enough, Flesh Gordon and Alice in Wonderland grossed a combined $165 million worldwide.

Alice in Wonderland (1976)

I remember sitting at the back of the theatre where in the past I had gone to see Disney films, The Planet of the Apes, The Poseidon Adventure ... all the films I grew up with. There were very few other patrons in attendance, and I sat in a row by myself. Two rows behind me were two young couples, who had arrived together, and they were having a great time. I was smitten enough with sex, and thrilled enough to be seeing it on the big screen (no matter how tame it was) that whacking to it was a natural response. I just wasn't very subtle about it, unfortunately. I had my coat on the seat next to me, and whenever screen sex seemed eminent, I looked around to see who was looking, acted as if I was very cold, and put the coat over my lap. As the movie progressed I did this seven or eight times, and the four people behind me became increasingly amused. At one point they actually laughed as the coat went back on my lap. Ah well, live and learn.

While this taught me to be discrete jerking-off in public, it also taught me I had the desire to see more adult movies, but I wanted those films to be hard-core from then on. At my first opportunity I made a trip to Seattle by myself. Sure I was eighteen, but I was still living at home and had to come up with an excuse to give my mother for the trip. I don't remember what I told her, it may have been I wanted to see a matinee of the new Monty Python film, or maybe it was that I just wanted to hang out in downtown Seattle for an afternoon. It doesn't matter, I told her some lie, and off I went.

I had already checked out the porn theatre ads in the Seattle Times and decided on the movie that was going to burst my hard-core cherry. Sadly, I've tried to recall but I just don't remember the title or any of the actors. It was called something like The Joy of Making Love, or at least something like that. I've done Google searches for years trying to locate a copy of it, but I've never had any luck.

However finding the theatre that day was easy; the Midtown Theatre was somewhere in the Fourth and Pike area (the Midtown as long since closed and been torn down.) Once I found it I didn't immediately go in. I had to make several passes back and forth before I worked up my courage. When I finally did go up to the box-office the ancient woman selling tickets almost wouldn't let me in. I looked younger than I was, and I didn't have a driver's license or ID. Finally she accepted my voter registration card as proof of age. In the seventies that's all you needed, I guess.

Outside was a sunny afternoon, but inside the theatre was pitch dark. Of course, it had once been a glorious movie palace, but those days were long over. It was very dark, very dirty, and more than a little scary. I saw many porn films at the Midtown in the subsequent years, but it always seemed kinda spooky. I passed through the lobby and then through the ratty, once red curtains into the auditorium. I couldn't see a thing except the screen. The movie was already running and was in the middle of a lengthy dialogue scene. I groped my way to an empty seat. There weren't very many people in the audience that afternoon, and they were spread out almost evenly among the many rows.

I watched the movie carefully; it was, after all, my first hard-core porn film. Following the talky dialogue sequence there was a scene with a guy who had been kidnapped by two women. The ladies tied him to a chair and had their way with him. I remember thinking, "Wow, there's a hard cock on the screen, and it's fucking someone's pussy. Cool!" The next thing that passed through my head was, "I bet they don't show any cum, that's probably too much." As you can guess, my next thought was, "Oh, fuck, there's the jizz! That's really cool!"

The only other scenes I remember is a woman hiding in a closet watching a couple fuck, and a scene with a man shackled to a wall while his wife and another woman do it on the bed, using a dildo with a little spinning fan on the end. The guy is so turned on that he blows his wad even though his hands are tied above his head. After he shoots, his wife walks over to him and looks on the floor. There is a mat with measurements printed on it. He has squirted his load over two feet away from his cock, and his wife is very impressed. That's really all I remember about the movie, except I thought it was stunningly hot and knew I wanted to see much, much more.

I had learned my lesson at Alice in Wonderland and so I jacked-off very clandestinely that day. It took a few more trips to the Midtown to discover that that really wasn't necessary at all.

I was hooked.

Heath Starkers Part II

2006-01-21T00:10:00.000-08:00

A few days ago I posted a naked picture purported to be Heath Ledger running naked through a field during the filming of Brokeback Mountain in Canada. Since then I've found another in the series. I wonder if there are many more? If I find them, I promise I'll post them.

This photo makes Heath look a lot hunkier than the first, but he's still kind of disappointing in the sexy department. Some movie stars just look better with their clothes on, as opposed to a majority of porn stars. They almost always look hotter naked. But I still like getting to see major stars in the buff. So, here is The Bare Ledge Part Two. Let me know what you think.

Random Snatches

2006-01-19T23:28:00.000-08:00

I’ve been horny this week. What is it that makes us horny? And why this week, but not so much last week? What is it that consumes us and makes us want to have sex with someone right now? It’s been almost overwhelming, frankly, even almost pervasive. I’m thinking about sex, I’m fantasizing about sex, I’m looking for sex.

Of course I’m not getting any sex. And so I’ve turned to my ever faithful porn collection nearly every night this week. I haven’t watched any one tape all the way through, so I’m not going to give you a full review of the videos I’ve been stroking to. I’ll watch them all again sometime, and when I’ve gotten through them in their entirety I’ll write about each one.

Some have been gay, some straight, some new, some classic. The only commonality they share is each and every one of them is a video that can usually get me off very quickly. I’ve watched snatches (meaning small bits, of course) of Inside Jennifer Welles from 1977, Goya starring the stunning Toni Ribas, 1001 Erotic Nights Part II The Forbidden Tales (Fabulous), Cadets featuring Chris Williams, and an early John Summers directed jack-off video called My Own Private Kentucky Studs. It’s been a week with a lot of whacking, and the muscles in the right side of my neck are getting sore and tired. Really.

We’re headed into the weekend now, so I’ll try and focus on watching a single video all the way through. But I have to admit I’ve had a good time sampling some of my old stand-by favorites.

Now I just have to find someone to have sex with for real. I wouldn’t mind sampling some of that as well. I just hope they like porn.

Speeding Down "Pacific Coast Highway"

2006-01-16T15:05:00.001-08:00

Last night I rubbed one off to the William Higgins directed 1981 gay classic Pacific Coast Highway. This film is a cherished, even venerated high point in the history of gay porn. When mentioned in books, magazines and on-line, it is reverently placed on par with milestone flicks like Kansas City Trucking Company, Gold Rush Boys, Lance and Leo and Class of ’84.

With respect, I have to disagree. I was kind of bored by the film, until the final stunningly sexy scene. Sure it’s hot to see young, muscular twinks bare-backing, and shooting large gobs of cock snot. And, in fairness, the cinematography is the highest quality. Details are very clear here, every hair in sharp focus (and there’s a lot of hair, the film being made in the early eighties and all. And we all know how much I like hair!) The cum shots are shown three times, from three different angles, once at normal speed, and twice in slow motion, graphically displaying every spurt and splash. Bizarrely, one of the cum shots is shown backwards first, the sperm flying up and inserting itself into a hard, straining cock.

The film suffers from several problems however. The primary problem is the scenes become visually repetitive, and the actors tend to look a lot alike, making it difficult to figure out who is doing what to whom.

The first two sex sequences, although featuring different actors, look exactly alike, both taking place beside the same waterfall. First off are Buddy Preston and Dan Rockford. They’re fairly hot, but, like all but the last scene, I fast-forwarded through a lot of it. The remote was in my hand again for the second scene. By the same waterfall Kip Noll sucks and fucks Jeremy Scott.

Kip Noll is hot in this film, but again there are so many cute blonde boys in the movie Kip doesn’t have much of a chance to stand out. Sure he has a gorgeous cock and obviously knows what he’s doing in the sack (or in this case, on the moss), but at no point during Pacific Coast Highway do you say to yourself, "Wow! There’s a star! That’s the guy to watch!"

Kip Noll Then

In the next sequence Kip and Jeremy Scott are back for a three-way with Steve Richards in a jeep. Here the problem is that the positions they contort themselves into just look stunningly uncomfortable. There were sore muscles and odd crease marks in their skin the day after this scene was filmed. However, your cock will get stiff when the jizz starts flying, they each shoot a massive load on the windshield of the jeep. By the completion of the segment, cum has covered the glass, dripping down in obscene rivulets. In a surprisingly hot moment, cleaning fluid and the window wipers are employed to make the windshield usable again.

Then J.W. King and Troy Richards do it by a stream. Oddly enough, this is completely forgettable, although the loads of cum are huge, and Troy’s hairy ass is prominently displayed and mercilessly fingered and fucked. Next up Steve Richards, Scott Anderson and Jeff Hunter enjoy a menage on the beach. Here the actors look like they’re having a good time at least, and fuck and suck with gusto.

The final scene, however, is the best of the movie, and makes wading through the first segments well worth the slog. Troy Richards and Steve Savage are brothers, camping in a tent on the beach. After drinking a lot of beer, Troy complains he has a crick in his neck, and his brother agrees to give him a rub down. The orange track shorts come off and again Troy’s hairy ass is delivered to the viewer in amazingly detailed close-ups. The sex the brothers engage in is hot, sweaty, nasty and messy. It’s terrific, one of the best sex scenes I’ve ever had the joy to see, and it’s a scene I’ll be revisiting a lot in the future.

Watching the film it becomes apparent why William Higgins is considered on of the greatest porn directors in the history of Adult Cinema. He began his career in the late seventies, and, somewhat surprisingly, is still working today. He currently hosts his own website, as well as continuing to make videos, working with very hot Eastern European boys and getting them to do some of the hottest and most twisted things ever. I love his current DVDs, as well as much of his older porn. I just have trouble with this particular film.

William Higgins Today

Pacific Coast Highway is proof a film’s classic status lies in the eyes of the beholder. Certainly a lot of guys love this flick, and I won’t attempt to take that away from them. I’m sure there are many films I think of as essential porn that others couldn’t get a hard-on to if they tried. That’s art, that’s subjective thought. But even if ninety minutes of this film kept me fast-forwarding, the final scene in the tent on the beach will keep me coming back. And keep me cumming.

An Evening at the Theatre

2006-01-15T21:43:00.000-08:00

Last November I wrote a post here about the old Apple Theatre in Seattle that, until it was torn down a few years ago, would show old 35mm prints of classic porn movies. Since then, I've had several people write describing the porn theatres in their town. Here are a couple of the emails I've received.

John told me about "the Tom Katt on Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood, California, across the street from the Pleasure Chest."

Ken wrote in to say, "In my hometown of Toledo, Ohio there is the Westwood Art Theatre, a full size movie house with a seating capacity of 240, standard fold down movie seating, and a 75 foot screen. They use to show 35mm film and had tons of projector difficulties. Now they have a DVD video projection screen with excellent quality. They run two features continuously every day. I was there last night. They show all sorts of films, and have one weekend a month set aside as Classic Sunday where they present golden age films re-released on DVD."

Thanks for the emails, John and Ken! Both these places sound like a lot of fun. The Tom Katt, of course, is the new name of the famous Pussycat Theatre, the venue Deep Throat played for a couple of years back in the seventies. Has anyone been to, or gotten any action at either the Tom Katt or the Westwood Art Theatre? Does anyone know of any other porn theatres in the USA they'd like to tell us about? I'd love to hear from you!

Deep Inside "Inside Deep Throat"

2006-01-12T01:34:00.000-08:00

Inside Deep Throat is a documentary released to theatres in 2005 detailing the production, distribution, prosecution and near mythic status of the world’s most famous porn film. We learn, rather surprisingly, that Deep Throat is the most profitable film in motion picture history. Filmed in 6 days for 25 thousand dollars, it has grossed over 600 million dollars to date. Not bad for a movie the government didn’t want anyone to see.

Written and directed by the film-making team Fenton Bailey and Randy Barbato, and narrated by Dennis Hopper, Inside Deep Throat is a fascinating exploration of a cultural phenomenon that took both the upper and middle classes by storm, delivering to the 1970s an outrageously radical new trend, "Porno Chic." The documentary also exposes the bigotry and hypocrisy of the Government and the Religious Right in their attempts to censor and repress the film.

Like the book The Other Hollywood I reported on back in November, Inside Deep Throat spends almost half its running time detailing the legal struggles endured by the film, its director and even its stars following its release and spectacular success. Unlike my complaints about The Other Hollywood, here we expect judicial maneuverings to be an intregal part of the narrative. After all, because of the conviction of star Harry Reems (the only artist in the history of the US prosecuted for their work), and the ultimate over-turning of that conviction, current obscenity laws are enforced as they are.

It was illegal to make porn in 1972, but hundreds of adult films were still produced. The artists who worked on Deep Throat (and other porn movies) didn’t do it for the money, or even the sexual thrill, but because they wanted to create social change, to wake audiences up to other moral principles, other attitudes toward sex. The anti-establishment movement was powerful, and sex films broke taboos in a manner no published material could. Deep Throat’s director Gerald Damiano, and stars Linda Lovelace and Harry Reems wanted to provoke the audience into thinking about sex (not to mention preconceived moral and ethical assumptions) in a critical way most run-of-the-mill Americans never had before. Needless to say, they succeeded beyond anyone’s wildest expectations.

It became a mainstream, Main Street hit, selling out theatres in nearly every town in America. Because it was so successful and made so much money, the FBI decided to make a moral example of it. Although the movie was banned in 23 states, it was the hot topic of conversation on television, at cocktail parties and around the water cooler. Subsequently, its success made porn acceptable and accessable to the average middle-class person.

Damiano is interviewed at length (cheerfully admitting the movie isn't very good), as is Reems, several distributors, a production assistant who worked on the filming, prosecutors, and the principle defense lawyers. A number of 1970s porn stars like Annie Sprinkle, Andrea True and, of course (in archival footage) the late Linda Lovelace also make appearances. But the most interesting commentary comes from the cultural leaders of the time, folks like Dick Cavett, Helen Gurley Brown, Carl Bernstein, Gore Vidal, Hugh Hefner, and Xaviera Hollander. Opinions are also offered by John Waters, Camille Paglia, Bill Maher, Dr. Ruth Westheimer, and Wes Craven (who admits he worked on porn films early in his career. He clams up, however, when asked which ones.)

All those interviewed for the documentary agree that Porn once looked like an exciting new art form, but tragically became a cheaply made, sloppily thrown-together commodity. I don’t completely agree, it’s not quite that bad today, but they have a point. Inexpensive video production turned what could have been a Brave New World of Art combining acting with fucking into the manufacture of thousands of videos that require little thought or pre-production from the maker, and the fast forward button close by for the consumer.

Inside Deep Throat is a fascinating and entertaining documentary about the creation of a cultural icon. The version that hit theatres was rated NC-17, but the DVD contains more nudity, and even briefly – Yes! -- Linda going down on Harry’s cock (and after all these years, it’s still fuckin’ impressive, let me tell you.) If this film didn’t come to your neighborhood cinema during its initial release, head out to Hastings and rent it – as I did last night. You’ll spend an hour and a half in front of the television without jacking-off, and you’ll still have a great time.

Heath Starkers

2006-01-11T01:57:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago, after writing the entry detailing my surprise and dismay regarding the marketing for the feature film Brokeback Mountain, a reader sent me this picture. He claims it's a shot of Heath Ledger, clandestinely snapped during the filming. I don't know if it's really The Ledge or not, but -- hey -- who am I to argue? I would hope Heath was a little hunkier, but, like most people, I take what I can get.

I still haven't made it to see Brokeback Mountain yet. But when I do, I'll be here to tell you all about it. Too bad this scene isn't in the film. But just wait, who knows what may lurk in the Director's Cut!

A Randy Barnes Fan

2006-01-08T22:05:00.000-08:00

A Porn Watcher reader recently wrote me about his favorite hairy web stud.

Hi Axel,

I saw your post about Hair Trigger. Based on what I saw on the site, I thought I'd take a chance and ask if you know anything about Randy Barnes? I can't find anything out -- he has been in a soft porn film, 2 Magazine, Playgirl and Men Magazine, but that's about it. Please let me know if you know anything more. Unlike other porn stars, he's pretty low key.

All the best, and Happy New Year.

J

Thanks J, and I totally agree with you the guy is extremely hot. I've seen several photo layouts that featured Randy, and he has always grabbed my attention, and I've always grabbed my cock. I literally don't know anything about the guy, unfortunately, and only found out the title of the soft core flick he performs in (By the Pool) by writing back and asking J.

So, since I have absolutely nothing constructive to contribute to his history, here is a picture of the stunning Mr. Barnes from the terrific website Hair Trigger, as well as the link J sent me. Enjoy!

And thanks for writing J!

http://www.pridesites.com/malemodelsplus/randy/

"I Do." I Did. Twice!

2006-01-07T15:06:00.000-08:00

I watched the classic gay porno flick I Do over the last couple of evenings. What a terrific film. I mean, it's hot enough it took me a couple of evenings to complete it, if you know what I mean. Originally shot on 35mm stock and released to adult theatres in 1984, I Do was sizzlingly directed by the prolific Steve Scott. The loose plot details the preparations for the wedding of sexy Andy Fuller. Although we never see the Bride's face we do get an extended sequence of Andy fucking her (in the ass!) while his Best Man (Dean London) watches unseen, masturbating. What makes this scene truly interesting, needless to say, is that there's a straight sex sequence in what otherwise is an all male porn film. Those just don't happen all that often. And they certainly never happen anymore; you just wouldn't see that in a gay video today.

The real star of the picture is hedonistic blonde twink Jeff Carson as the brother of the Bride. He manipulates the guys in the movie into having sex, both with him and with each other. Joe Marconi is a barber who blows the Groom; A tailor, played by the great Steve Collins, sucks off the Best Man, devouring his huge load of cum; Two chauffeurs from competing limousine services do each other in the back of one of the cars. These are all terrificlly hot erotic sequences.

But Carson saves the best sex for himself. He "assists" the wedding photographer in a double suck-off of a model (billed as Rick Faulkner, although his face is never seen) being photographed in various jock-straps and cock-rings; he gets fucked by the caterer, a nasty scene with legendary huge-cocked Tim Kramer using Crisco as lube; and in the final (and best) scene is cornered and sandwiched by the Groom and Best Man as revenge once they've figured out what's going on. Very, very hot! Very, very wackable!

I love these older movies. The situations are more realistic (many of the scenes contain only blowjobs, with fucking saved for just the right moment), the guys are often hotter, and sex scenes unfold at a more leisurely pace, without ever becoming tedious. I Do is definitely one of the best of these classic eighties films. From this Porn Watcher, it is very highly recommended!

Str8 Guy Fantasies For Real

2006-01-01T23:56:00.000-08:00

I was taking my shower this morning and started thinking about something a friend mentioned to me last night. Well, actually, she didn't exactly mention it to me as much as shout it towards me. We were, after all, in an over crowded gay bar and it was New Year's Eve. Now that I think about it, it may have been New Year's Day by then. Last night marched drunkenly on to the wee hours, and much of it is a little foggy.

My shouting friend has lately become fascinated with porn queen Jenna Jameson. Before you ask, no, my friend is not a lesbian, but she does have a healthy interest in porn. She recently read Ms Jameson's autobiography, How to Make Love Like a Porn Star, and was so taken with it, she started watching porn flicks starring the great Jenna. And, before you raise your hand again to ask, yes, she enjoyed them very much.

But the thing I was dwelling on, soaped up in the shower but really wanting to go back to bed this morning, was that, according to my friend, Jenna is now in a committed relationship with (or possibly even married to) a very nice guy. Good for her, I say, and if she were to retire from porn because of this relationship, I certainly would understand. Or, possibly she would want to keep on working with her husband's blessings. That's fine too. But apparently she's made a professional decision that I find a little bizarre.

The Queen of All Straight Porn is still making sex movies, but now that she's got that special guy waiting at home, she only appears in videos with women: She no longer performs sex acts with men. This seems more than slightly hypocritical to me. I believe sex is sex. If you're in a committed relationship, and choose only to have sex with each other, great! If, on the other hand, you have an open relationship and elect to fuck everyone you come in contact with, that's great too (and you should call me)! But if you marry someone who is a major porn superstar, you have to have a pretty clear view of what they do for a living before you go into the relationship. It isn't a big secret, after all. If, somehow you're confused about what they do for a vocation, rent a movie for God's sake, and find out before getting down on bended knee. To propose, I mean, not to ... well, you know what I mean.

So, I think for her to agree only to have sex with women can only be construed as playing into her new husband's "straight guy fantasies." I suppose Jenna having sex with men would make him jealous, but with another woman ... well ... Dude, that's just hot. Come on buddy, grow up! Does it honestly make any difference?

And what if the husband wanted to have sex with someone other than Jenna? Would he only be allowed to do it with another guy? That seems fair to me.

I know I love seeing straight boys having sex with other guys! I hope Mr. Jameson goes for it. I think it would be a huge turn on for Jenna!

Rocco, Mark & Yves

2005-12-29T19:04:00.000-08:00

Calvin, A blog reader, recently asked, "What do you think of these three straight porn men: Rocco Siffredi (this man was made to fuck. He's Italian with a huge cock), Mark Davis (handsome Englishman with a big dick) and Yves (I can't remember the rest of his name, but he's a Frenchman with a huge cock as well)? I seldom watch straight porn, but when I do the above names are my favorite right now. The latter two can be seen a lot in the Anabolic World Sex Tour DVD's and are totally hot because all the men have huge, uncut cocks (which I LOVE) and fuck and cum without any apologies about not wearing condoms and cumming everywhere and on anything."

Great question, Calvin. Rocco is one of my straight favorites as well. He's a nasty fuck, and he loves the fantasy of being abusive to women who obviously love him doing it. He isn't afraid to be aggressive and has a filthy mouth. He often makes these lovely young porn cuties suck his toes or (most often) lick his ass-hole. It's very hot. He's also got a tight muscular body, and a massive, hairy pubed cock. Just terrific.

After reading your post last night I jacked-off to one of my favorite Rocco Siffredi flicks Immortal from In-X-Cess Films. It's about a young woman who visits a chateau in France where she keeps either hallucinating or time-traveling to the 17th century. Rocco is there, needless to say, and the young woman watches him fuck and suck, never in a couple, but always in smallish groups. But the film also contains one of the best orgy sequences I've ever seen in a straight porn film. It's amazingly hot.

Although Rocco has done a number of plot driven adult films, he also has appeared in a ton of Euro-Gonzo porn flicks, often featuring his name in the title (he's one of the few straight male porn stars who's name can sell DVDs), where he and (usually) a couple other guys fuck several hot young women.

Mark Davis is a very different and frustrating case. When I first saw one of his videos, I thought he was the hottest thing I'd ever seen. I couldn't believe his nasty mouth, spewing abuse with a sexy British accent, his muscularly defined body, a handsome face, and (since I usually prefer my guys cut) even his massive uncut man-hood. I thought he was one of the sexist cum-machines I'd ever come across. Lately however, he's returned to production in a number of gonzo fuck flicks, and he is a perfect example of one of the stars who just needs to retire. Now shaved bald, a gut developing, and his interest obviously fading, he just is no turn-on to me any longer.

I'm aware of a number of Yves' performing in European porn these days, and so I'm not sure which one you're referring to. Please email me a picture, because I'd love to know who you find such a turn-on.

So, that's my thoughts on these guys. What do you all think? I'd love to hear your opinions.

Hidden Hard-Core Holiday Hotties

2005-12-25T19:24:00.000-08:00

It's really kind of mind boggling how many porn flicks exist that either take place at Halloween or satirize main stream horror movies. Thrillers seem to be a genre easily adapted into adult entertainment. If you've seen any of these Hollywood scream-fests in the last few years, the reason porn producers plagiarize them becomes fairly obvious: Most horror movies are pretty sexy, or focus on sex, or even, on occasion, feature sex, usually between two (never more than two) hot early-twenty-somethings looking to get nasty.

So I suppose that explains why porn with a Christmas theme is so difficult to find. Sure, there is the European produced Horny Holidaze (that I mentioned in an earlier post), and I have a Dirk Yates jack-off flick, Men for All Seasons, where a guy strokes to a cum splattered chest beside a decorated tree on Christmas morning. But other than those two, I really can't think of another porn film that takes place during the Holidays.

Certainly it's tough to imagine a more romantic moment in life than making love under twinkling tree lights on Christmas Eve, but that activity just doesn't show up in whack flicks. First of all, porn doesn't deal with romance very often or very well. And traditional holiday films rarely have subplots dealing with sex, even in a sly or subtle way. Let's face it, when we're watching porn, the one thing we're really not looking for is warm, fuzzy (except in that sexy hairy way), and heart-warming family stories. With the success in the last few years of big budget Hollywood films like Bad Santa and Christmas with the Kranks maybe a year or so from now we'll be seeing adult DVDs based on that not-intended-for-the-kiddies kind of Christmas comedy. But I wouldn't hold my breath waiting for that to happen.

There are several other types of porn than just video of course, but even that is devoid of hard-core holiday celebration. Occasionally you can find some photo sets with a Christmas theme (usually involving Santa -- or, rather, someone dressed -- or, rather undressed -- as Santa.) I run across these occasionally on adult websites, and they're usually fun and fairly jackable, but they aren't very easy to find. And there are only three or four of these series', and I keep running into the same sets over and over with nothing new, it seems, being produced.

So in the meantime, I hope you have a peaceful, restful, and porn filled holiday season. And if you know of any good Christmas porn, please let me know. I'd love to see it!

Hair Today, Gone Tomorrow (Or Rather Hair Yesterday, Gone Today)

2005-12-17T17:54:00.000-08:00

It's a pain in the ass after you've give a hot guy head, and for the next couple of hours you have that annoying little pubic hair stuck at the back of your throat. It doesn't gag you, it doesn't even make you cough, it just sits there and you can't quite get at it, either by swallowing, working it with your tongue, or jabbing it with a finger.

That being said, I love hairy guys, and that hair at the back of my throat is more than worth it. I'm not necessarily into bears, or guys that are completely covered with hair, but a well sculpted chest, covered with dark (or blonde or red) hair is a massive turn-on for me. Add hair to legs, stomach, pits, pubes, balls and (this is a big one for me) a bubble butt and I'm over the moon in love (or at least lust) with that guy.

This is also how I like my porn stars. To see a video of a guy fucking (doesn't matter to me if he's gay or straight) and to notice fuzz on his balls or covering his ass will very often get me off at that moment. It's that simple. If you think about my favorite stars (and I've talked about them often on this blog) they usually have hairy chests or more. And that could well be why I'm drawn to older porn. Porn stars didn't shave anything twenty years ago. That isn't the case today.

Unfortunately someone in the last ten or fifteen years decided that muscle definition is better observed if there is no hint of fluff, fuzz or hair of any kind. This may be true, I don't know, I'm not a gym boi, but I do know men devoid of body hair are (to my way of thinking) not as masculine looking as guys with it. I like masculine men, so why would I want them to look like little hairless boys?

And far worse than the chest being shaved are the guys who shave their pubic hair. Now what's the point of that? Okay, you say it makes your cock look bigger, and, again, maybe it does. But it also makes it look ... well ... alien. I like a cock to look like an adult man's cock. That means with hair, the more the better.

James Brossman and Friends

There are few men working in porn today sporting chest hair or even untrimmed pubes. I'm sure some must be hirsute, but producers seem to want them as smooth as possible. Occasionally European stars will appear with their hair in place. A good example is the stunningly hot James Brossman. But then, once I started to expect him to be hairy, he starred in a video shaved and smooth. What a disappointment! There is no one I can think of working in porn today, gay or straight, who is reliably and consistently hairy.

During the Golden Age of Porn things were very different, of course. Body hair was simply accepted and expected, both for men and women. Sex Stars were projected onto the big screen as they were, au natural. We saw moles, birth marks, bad teeth, and most notably hair everywhere! Woman sported hairy snatches, and men were furry in all the places you'd expect a man to be furry. Even stars with relatively smooth chests (like Mike Ranger or Kevin James) had naturally hairy legs and pubes and balls. I've always loved that look and always will. Porn from twenty and thirty years ago may have been better produced, but the stars were not produced at all. And if you ask me, that's the way it should be.

Here are a few of the hairy guys, gay and straight, past and present, I find really hot. Sorry if I left your favorite out.

Some Hot Hairy Gay Porn Stars

Chad Douglas with an Anxious Guy

Tom Katt & Lover

The Amazing Zak Spears

Some Straight, Hairy Favorites

Rick Savage & Greg Derek with a Happy Girl

The Legendary Harry Reems & Sucker

John Seamen and a Cum Licker

Steve Drake and a Lucky Babe

Youngish Ron Jeremy and Buddy.

This is from a straight film. So, just what do you think is going on here, hum? But notice the pubes on Ron's friend. Fuzzy. And I like it.

Get Strung Out, Then Repeat

2005-12-17T15:48:00.000-08:00

Do you have porn tapes or DVDs you haven't watched in a couple years -- or even longer? I certainly do, and last night I pulled one out from the very bottom of the porn trunk. I haven't seen this film in at least three years, and even though it boasts a stellar cast of top rate straight porn stars, there's plenty of reasons I haven't wacked to it for a long time.

Titled Satin Dolls, the 1985 shot-on-video, almost plotless release is set in the fashion industry. Jerry Butler plays a promoter who fucks both older fashion icon mother (Cyndee Summers) and her younger daughter to make his way up the corporate ladder. Meanwhile, sexy photographer Steve Drake (one of my very favorite straight stars) is shooting a girl posing in a bubble-bath, and he ends up fucking her (as if you didn't see that one coming.) Billy Dee plays a blind musician who has a three-way with two women, turning out not to be blind at all. And Francois Papillon (another of my all time favorites) is a male stripper who gives the high hard one of a hot young woman. What these last two episodes have to do with the fashion world is anybody's guess. There is also an extended girl-on-girl scene (and frankly, I couldn't care less about those. I'm here for the hot guys, know what I mean?) Besides Summers, the film features Bunny Bleu, Gina Carrera, Debra Lynn and Andrea Brittain.

Now, the year this video was made (1985) is important. This is the period when porn was moving from being filmed on 35mm theatrical stock to shot on video production. It is also the period when production quality was deteriorating at a rapid pace. It was tough renting videos in those days because you never quite knew what you were taking home (just like at the bar); an excellent, highly jerkable, cinematic experience, or something thrown together over the course of a day and a half. True, the latter might have some hot scenes, but it wouldn't necessarily hold together as fine, memorable porn.

The stars appearing in the films didn't inform the quality either. It seems your A-list porn crowd would work for any producer who could write a pay-check, and popped back and forth from well made, high-budget work to sleazy, film-as-you-can videos. And although Satin Dolls has an outstanding cast, and a couple of really hot sequences (I mean, face it, I did buy the fucker at some point years ago), it looks and feels cheap. There are no out-doors establishing shots, everything is filmed in bedrooms, livingrooms, and a bathroom, and I'd say from the look of the place, all in the same house. Director Jack Remy, who's resume is long and prolific, tried to give us the feeling of group sex by intercutting two couples fucking separately, but it's obvious they are in entirely different locations. All the intercutting provides is distraction as we become more interested in one couple or the other.

The 1980s low-budget videos made during this transition from film almost universally contain an annoying cost-saving element that frankly drove me over the edge at the time, and, I discovered last night, still makes me crabby. They would edit a sex scene together, and then show the identical sequence over and over, sometimes three or four times. How stupid did they think we were? We notice that he grabs her tit just as she says, "Oh, yeah, that's how I like it." We notice that just as his cock slips out of her pussy the camera cuts to her face in ecstasy. We notice we've seen the identically edited sequence four times in a row. Why not just shoot a little more film, a few more angles, or even longer sections of the same angle? Cheap, that's all it is, and it somehow makes the viewer feel that way as well.

The other inescapable problem with this video is usually reliable Jerry Butler. When I first saw him years ago, I remember thinking he was so sexy. There aren't many better sex-performances than Butler's in Taboo III, Sex Spa USA, or Pandora's Mirror. In Satin Dolls he is young, ripped, hairy-chested and very handsome (although you'll want to avoid staring at the blonde streaked hair.) In this stud's autobiography Raw Talent he admits he beat a drug addiction during his porn career. I'm guessing this movie was filmed before he hit rehab, because in his two sex scenes, Jerry not only has trouble obtaining a hard-on, but he fucks harder and faster than a hummingbird. He never lets up, never slows down, never has a moment of tenderness, just pounds away, faster than I knew anyone could fuck. You're just waiting for the nose-bleed and giggling to start.

Let's just say Satin Dolls didn't get me off last night. After watching it, I had to switch to a different video to finish pulling one off. And I'll be honest, these days I don't avoid videos from the mid-eighties, but I am very careful before buying one. I check them out online, preview them and see how wackable they are before throwing down my hard-earned cash. I'm careful of being duped, it doesn't matter if all my favorite stars are in it (as many are in this one), and remember packaging means nothing. As mother always told us, "Let the buyer beware." Damn it, mother was always right.

Sidebar: Brokeback Mountain PR

2005-12-11T15:30:00.000-08:00

This doesn't have anything to do with porn, exactly, but have you noticed how the newly released main-stream gay romance Bareback ... er ... Brokeback Mountain is being publicized? They're pushing it as a film for everyone, not just gay men, a romantic tragedy that's sure to be an Oscar contender. Okay, they aren't specifically trying to sell tickets to those of us who would prefer to sit home and jack-off to DVDs of hot, but fake "cowboys" having sex with each other. But the producers have to know we are their main audience, I mean just look at the casting. They couldn't have found two hunkier leads than Heath Ledger and the unbelievably handsome Jake Gyllenhaal. They could have cast guys, even stars, who look like the average cowboy, and no matter what your fantasies are whispering to you, we all know what most real cowboys look like, and it isn't Jake and Heath.

But also look at the photos the PR machine has released. And I mean, look closely. I've attached one below.

What caught your eye first? Heath or Jake's stunning faces? The cool old truck? The train whizzing by? Or was it Heath Ledger's basket! I mean, come on, have you ever seen the outline of a major star's cock that plainly in any publicity photo you've seen in the past? You can practically see every hair! Now, I like cut guys, so I suddenly have a new found interest in Heath, but come on.

It seems like a blatant subconscious (is that an oxymoron?) grasp at the gay porn loving audience. For all I know, his cock is air-brushed into the picture, but somehow I doubt it. I think the picture was set up that way specifically to market to a certain market, you and me.

So, yeah, I can't wait to see this movie.

Get Real

2005-12-07T23:44:00.000-08:00

I loath the Reality Show phenomenon. I have studiously avoided Real World, The Bachelor, The Biggest Loser, Fear Factor, The Apprentice, and even all of the Survivors. I'm just not very interested, and become confused and annoyed when at a cocktail party or hanging around the water-cooler people start discussing the events featured on these programs. I have no clue what they're talking about, and I'm mystified that intelligent, schooled folks are so involved in the politics and machinations of contestants that are obviously so desperate for attention they'll do almost anything.

So, you can imagine my astonishment when discovering this bizarre television debacle has encroached into the sacred world of porn. Jenna Jameson will be hosting a Reality Series on the Playboy Channel titled Jenna's American Sex Star. For more information look at http://www.playboy.com/playboytv/original_series/americansexstar/

Ms Jameson will serve as host, prompting in-studio judges Ron Jeremy, the world's most famous porn star, adult film queen Christy Canyon, and prolific adult director Jim Powers to winnow out the lesser girls so the home audience can vote on their favorites. The ultimate winner will receive a contract with one of the major porn studios.

All I can say is; Sweet Jesus! This is surely one of the signs of the apocalypse! What next, potential porn stars coming to my home and blowing me so I'll buy their DVDs? Well, now that I think about it, that's not such a bad idea. Does anyone know who I call to pitch a new Reality Show?

Chi Chi Chic

2005-12-03T13:53:00.000-08:00

There are few truly outstanding video directors in the porn business today. It's hard to think of more capable directors than Jerry Douglass, Michael Ninn or Trevor Zinn. But one of the most consistently strokable of all the directors is Chi Chi LaRue. She has been doing terrific films for the past 15 years or so, and remains at the top of her field. She directs gay, bi, straight, lesbian and kink flicks, all with equal flair and obsession for detail. Some have complex plots, others are gonzo wall-to-wall fucking flicks. All of them make me hard and horny.

Yes, Chi Chi is a drag queen, and probably one of the most visible and recognizable working today in any industry. When she started directing porn, she worked under the monikor Taylor Hudson (Liz and Rock's last names combined.) Of course in those days, no studio wanted to be identified as the company who was producing films made by a drag queen. Somewhere along the way, fortunately, that changed. In fact, it probably changed because of Chi Chi. When videos are this good, and sell this well (because they're so good), any company would be thrilled to distribute them, no matter who was behind the product. And these days, having Chi Chi direct one of your films is considered quite a coupe. The studios now fall over each other to have her under contract.

Recently she has branched out somewhat, making personal appearances, hosting an amazingly hot porn website, as well as writing her autobiography, Making It Big, Sex Stars, Porn Films & Me. I read this book some years ago and loved it. It's packed with the kind of on-the-set gossip you really crave, as well as the details of what it's like to be on the shoot of a porn video. Just terrific, funny and informative.

But, no matter how successful she becomes in these other areas, it's the movies that will put her into the history books (that is, if porn had history books.) Some of her finest flicks include My Sister's Husband, Ass Lick Alley, the recent Kollide, and the unbelievably hot How The West Was Hung the come-back film of the unbeatably beatable Axel Garret (I've added a montage of pictures from that movie below.

I wish there were more directors with Chi Chi's passion and dedication. She is a pornographer who pushes the envelope, turning jack-off movies into an art form, films you want to watch to be entertained as well as aroused. Let's hope she keeps working for many years to come.

Soft Core is Hard Core Dull

2005-11-24T16:58:00.000-08:00

Do you remember twenty years ago when "cable television" was the hot new thing? In those days you didn't sign-up to cable for better reception (did you really get better reception?), nor for the all-news networks (there was only CNN, and we all thought that was a pretty dumb idea, who's going to watch news at three o'clock in the morning?), nor for the shopping channels (they were boring then -- and still are.) You might have gotten cable installed to watch MTV (I'll always remember talking to a friend on the phone late one night. She was also watching MTV at the same time while we chatted, and suddenly the video of Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go came on. Neither of us had seen it before, and the conversation went completely silent as both of us, fifty miles apart, stared in stark horror at our respective television screens. When the video ended, we both exhaled, and at exactly the same moment said, "What the fuck was that?" Talk about pornography!)

The primary reason folks signed up for cable was to subscribe to Cinamax and HBO. Now in those days, HBO didn't produce their own cool series' like Sex in the City and The Sopranos. Like Cinamax, HBO just showed movies and only movies, and you came to realize fairly quickly that you really didn't need to see Norma Rae or Police Academy six to nine times over a week. Sure it was fun to have these movies piped into your home, but we quickly discovered how much more convenient renting films and using the VCR is.

But we didn't unsubscribe from the Premium Movie Channels for one very good reason. Late at night they would show soft core sex flicks. Some were pretty tame, today they might even be rated PG-13. Others were produced for the sole purpose of being shown on cable in the middle of the night. And a few were hard core porn, but with any shots of dicks or penetration edited out. Sanitized for your protection, I guess.

I was twenty or twenty-one at the time, and at first I thought I'd died and gone to heaven. Here, it seemed, was porn in an endless amount (at least until about 5 AM), and I could sit there in my own livingroom and jack-off to my heart's content. I didn't have to rent porn tapes from the corner mini-mart, enduring the clerk giving me the fish-eye because he (or more likely, she) knew exactly what I was going to do while watching it. No, the sex was right there, nightly on my TV, with no middle-man.

Needless to say, even for a horny twenty-year-old it didn't take long to realize something essential was missing. There was no cock, no cunt, no fucking -- I started to wonder if the performers were really having sex or just acting. I mean, part of the reason I found (and find) porn so hot is the knowledge they're really doing it. And maybe they were, but there was no proof, no evidence (certainly no cum-shot.) Humphrey Bogart once said acting is like sex ... If you're talking about it, you're not doing it. It seemed to me these movies were packed with performers neither acting nor fucking.

I've been thinking about soft core films again because of my recent ruminations about the Boys Gone Wild series. I know it seems as if I should love soft core films, for the simple reason I'm enthralled with plots and the events leading up to the sex. But don't get me wrong -- I still like watching the sex! The problem I have with soft core movies is they don't function as anything you expect from a movie. They aren't cinema (The production, plots, acting, and direction aren't strong enough to maintain artistic intention), and they aren't porn (You don't see anything more than you would in an R rated film). So, the viewer becomes frustrated with the film both artistically and carnally.

I have to wonder what the soft core producer's intention is. We can't jack-off to them, and they certainly don't illuminate the human condition. I guess the intention is to introduce sex to kids that can't get porn any other way, and to frustrate those of us who really enjoy watching people fuck. I'll take a pass on soft core in the future.

Guys Gone Wild Redux

2005-11-19T17:25:00.000-08:00

After my diatribe a few days ago about how dull I found the Guys Gone Wild DVDs, I was surprised to read an article detailing this very subject in the newest addition of Unzipped Magazine. Apparently I wasn't alone in finding the series boring, or alone in complaining, since the producers have made some changes.

In three new titles -- Dude, Where's My Pants?, Heat Stroke, and The Big Easy -- the hunky guys finally go further, that is, some of them actually get hard-ons and jack-off. Now I haven't seen these films myself, so I don't know if they jack-off to orgasm, but at least they get turned on and play with it. That's a big improvement.

Have any of you seen the new, harder DVDs? I'd love to hear your opinion, and if you think its actually possible to stroke to them. I'm more than willing to give Guys Gone Wild a second chance.

Seattle's Big Apple (Theatre)

2005-11-16T19:05:00.000-08:00

Do any honest-to-God, sit-down Theatres still exist that show old 35mm prints of classic porn movies? I don't know of any, but I hope there are still some around. The last one I've heard of closed about six years ago. The Apple Theatre was in Seattle on lower Capital Hill's Boran street, just east of Interstate 5. The building was certainly never one of the great Hollywood Show Palaces, but was constructed (I'm guessing in the 40s) as a small square cement building. The auditorium had maybe 12 rows with an aisle running down the center, and if there were 150 seats I'd be shocked.

By the time I began to patronize The Apple in the late 1980s it was somewhat run-down. Run-down isn't even the right word -- I think "a very cluttered septic-tank" might be closer to the real description. Because the theatre was open 24/7, there was never any time to perform maintenance on the seats or screen, paint the interior, or even clean the place. Sure, when you walked in you always caught a faint whiff of PineSol, but I could never quite figure out where they'd been using it. And let's be honest, we all know what went on in this large, darkened room, with people enjoying sex on the big screen (not to mention in the audience), and so it's easy to guess what was splattered all over The Apple auditorium's seats and floor.

Now, The Apple showed the straight classics from the Golden Age of Porn. Not poorly projected video that is somewhat blurry and slightly out of focus, but theatrical 35mm film. Of course, by the time I saw the movies, the prints were fairly old, full of splices, scared by scratches and often featured unfortunate sound. But the large screen made the picture clear and distinct, and every hair and mole somehow became glamorous. The still pictures I've included here are all from films I enjoyed at The Apple Theatre.

You may be wondering if I ever witnessed guys having sex in the worn seats around me during the movie. Frankly, the answer is "usually." It was one of those places. Even between features, the lights were never turned on (I'm not even sure there were lights to turn on). You just sat in complete darkness waiting for the next Vanessa Del Rio and Paul Thomas (or whoever) movie. And so, gay guys like me who love straight porn attended, as well as young frat guys who discovered all too quickly they had wandered into the wrong theatre, joined by what seemed like a lot of married men looking for a blow-job from a guy, but who were too nervous to hit a bath house. Needless to say, things happened.

Taking a leak was also kind of an adventure; A large cold, cement prison-like room behind the screen, there was always someone waiting to hook-up. But the lights were on back there, and you could at least see whoever was putting the moves on you (as well as a clear view of their cock.) Unfortunately it was also where the dilapidated theatre seats, broken marquee letters, and general garbage was stored, and the piles were frightening merely because of sheer volume.

I know I've made The Apple sound awful, but I loved the place, because it was there I was able to see some great old porn flicks the way they were intended to be seen: on the big screen. Sure, I sat through a lot of instantly forgettable films with instantly forgettable titles, starring instantly forgettable "actors." But I also got to see the amazing Taboo, the classic Jack and Jill with Jack Wrangler and Samantha Fox, and the stunningly hot 1001 Erotic Nights Part Two starring Francois Papillon and Jamie Gillis. It was where I watched Mike Ranger, Young Tom Byron, Hershel Savage, Jerry Butler and Harry Reems fuck Sharon Mitchell, Veronica Hart, Nina Hartley, Marilyn Chambers and Seka. It was a communal experience you simply don't get alone at home with a remote in your left hand. Like the legitimate theatre, the cinema and, yes, even the church, sitting in an audience with a group of people, no matter what they're actually doing, makes the experience somehow more important. And certainly more memorable.

Besides, I like jacking-off in public.

Renting My Breast

2005-11-13T03:50:00.000-08:00

So, I'm just wondering, where do you rent adult DVDs and video tapes? I patronize a small locally owned porn shop, as well as a Castle Superstore in the city where I live. There are other porn shops here of course, but these two places offer the best selection and the lowest rental prices. Unfortunately, both establishments are quite a drive from down town, where I reside. But I guess I shouldn't complain, I'm lucky. There are small towns in America where you simply cannot find wackers to rent at all.

It's becoming more and more difficult to find those few businesses that allow you to check out an adult film for the weekend. Just a few years ago, as the Religious Right Wackos began taking over and disrupting the American way of life, standard video rental outlets like Blockbuster, Premiere and Hollywood Video stopped offering porn. Remember not so long ago when you would head to the video store, pick up a thriller, a comedy, maybe something for the kids, and then select a couple jack-off flicks for later on Saturday night? Those days are over. The corporations have bowed to the conservative Culture Nazis, those righteous few who feel the need to control what you and I can and cannot watch in the privacy of our own homes.

Pornography is a multi-million dollar industry just in the US alone, so why were these companies so easily persuaded to give up this income? Frankly, I have no idea. Did they really feel that any adverse publicity supplied by The Picketing Hypocrites would hurt the entire video rental business? Apparently they did, the warning signs announcing the adult section (no one under 18 permitted) disappeared relatively quickly over the course of two or three years.

Even small "mom and pop" grocery stores and 7-11 type convenience stores that feature video rentals have discontinued offering stroke flicks. Is there any corporation in America today (other than cable networks and major hotel chains) that condone and allow adult films in their rental racks? None that I know of.

The city where I live decided to take this affront to the First Amendment a step further. Five or six years ago, the City Council passed a law declaring adult boutiques could not be within 5,000 yards (or some absurdly lengthy distance like that) of any school or place of worship. Within the city limits, that leaves three small approximately two or three block areas for these businesses to survive. Why do the City Council and the Religious Fundamental Extremists want to prevent legal commerce, stopping tax revenue from coming into the government coffers?

It seems to me America was built on capitalism, and if these businesses thrive, then that's an indication there's an audience for this kind of product. Needless to say, I don't condone child porn; of course I believe it should be illegal. But is it really so important to The Right that we don't watch consenting adults doing whatever they want to do with each other? Well, yes, I suppose it is. I guess we've always known that. It's just as important to them to know what we're viewing as it is that they know what we're doing. I mean, after all, according to them remember, homosexuals shouldn't marry. And, they believe, no one should worship in any way other than how they worship their "Christian God."

I'm grateful for the internet, that's all I have to say. You can download, rent and buy anything you want at any hour of the day or night. You can even purchase things from other parts of the world, things you'd never be able to find in any video outlet anywhere in the US. Boy, that must send our Bigoted Big Brothers (in the 1984 sense) right over the edge.

Okay, Okay, I'll end the political diatribe now. Let's get back to jacking-off to hot, open-minded people doing really nasty things to each other. If we can find some place to rent it.

Guys Gone Wild

2005-11-12T12:45:00.000-08:00

Oh, dear, here's another disappointing one.

My room mate celebrated a birthday recently and received two of the Guys Gone Wild DVDs. The male off-shoot of the wildly popular "As Seen On TV" Girls Gone Wild series, this is not the best stroking material you'll ever have the opportunity to rent. These are basically soft-core versions of Sean Cody or Dirk Yates videos, and not nearly as successful.

A couple of scantily clad young female film-makers hit the Spring Break hot spots finding muscular and usually drunk young studs who agree to take their shirts off, expose and shake their asses, and maybe, maybe, allow us to see their cocks. A couple even go so far as to take a shower for the camera. All the boys are really, really hot, but none of them ever develop a hard-on, nor do they touch either the women or each other. I mean, come on, let's face it, maybe straight men find shirtless women showing their tits hot, but guys with their shirts off, and rarely going much further gets a little tedious after thirty or forty minutes.

Now admittedly, in Spring Break, the DVD I watched last night, the first guy is stupendously hung, sporting a larger dick than I've seen for a long time, either on video, the internet, or most tragically, in real life. But after you've seen this gigantic (albeit relentlessly soft) cock, that's it. No one hotter or larger ever shows up during the rest of the DVD. No special features are included, and the running time is not quite ninety minutes.

God bless the ambitious young women who decided to put these films together, it's a terrific idea, but I wish they had gone to film school first. The picture often distractingly shakes, guys take off their pants or whip out their cocks while the camera stays firmly focused on the their faces, and the image is often shockingly over-exposed.

To sum up, I started watching Guys Gone Wild "Spring Break" with a hard-on and was flaccid fifteen minutes into it. And I fast-forwarded through more than ninety percent of the video. Good concept, poor execution. Oh, well.

The Other Hollywood

2005-11-11T23:28:00.000-08:00

Remember when you were in High School and had to sit through boring history classes? It's certainly vivid in my memory. Odd then, isn't it, that today history fascinates me? I guess it was the way my worn-out teachers presented the historical material.

I thought about those classes as I finished reading The Other Hollywood; An Uncensored Oral History of the Porn Film Industry this past weekend. Written, or rather compiled, by Legs McNeil and Jennifer Osbourne, the book covers 1950 to the present. Only the straight porn industry is examined, although the authors state in the introduction that they're considering writing a sequel dealing with gay porn. The book contains no narrative, but is composed entirely of quotes by the major players of the history of porn. Don't be confused, those major players are not just sex stars, directors and producers (although you do hear a fair amount from Ron Jeremy, Sharon Mitchell, Tom Bryon, Henri Pachard and Linda Lovelace), but also includes vice cops, prosecutors, and a whole lot of newspaper articles.

Covering the birth of the stag film through the explosion of AIDS and gonzo video, the book is an examination of porn as a social phenomenon. From 8mm loops clandestinely purchased wrapped in brown paper through mail order, to Deep Throat's ground-breaking critical and financial success, to the proliferation of peep booths and adult theatres, to the emergence of video and the outbreak of HIV, the book studies how pornography affected politics, law, and even romantic love in America.

I expected the book to detail casting, production, and distribution, and was hoping for a little gossip, but it doesn't deliver much in these areas. Instead we get the same old take we've heard before, the same old re-tread material that pops up on Nightline and Newsweek every couple of years; Lovelace forced to film Deep Throat (Come on, do any of us really believe that?), John Holmes and the Wonderland Murders, the FBI's MIPORN sting and subsequent trials, Marc Wallace spreading HIV to several co-stars, not to mention a whole slew of overdoses, rapes, suicides and a lot of disgruntled and complaining co-workers. You've heard or read all this before, and at 590 pages The Other Hollywood is kind of a long slog.

This book shouldn't even be used in a High School History of Porn class. It would put students to sleep as quickly as a thick tome about the lesser aborted battles of the War of 1812. Take a pass on this one.

The Rubber Game of the Match

2005-11-08T23:28:00.000-08:00

I've been thinking lately about the use of the "raincoat" in modern porn.

When the AIDS epidemic hit some time around 1980, condoms suddenly started to be widely used in adult videos and films. In gay porn they were standard, but they also appeared regularly in straight dirty movies. This was, of course, the wise route to take. No one should have gambled with their lives, not for a largely disposable entertainment form, no matter how much we all love it.

Since then, we've learned a lot about HIV and AIDS, and this knowledge allows some control over its spread. We also have (Thank God) new drugs that extend and improve the lives of people living with the disease. Because of all this, most straight videos produced today don't use condoms. And there are even a few gay production companies that have done away with them entirely. Bare-backing, cum-eating and cream-pies films are a profitable sub-genre fetish cottage industry.

As much as I believe in safe sex, a practice I always use in my own sex life, I have to admit, with shame (kinda), rubbers in stroke-films are a huge turn-off to me. Sex flicks are all about fantasy, and, frankly, condoms aren't involved in any of my fantasies. In addition, I love videos with strong plots, and particularity ones with period settings. But it annoys me when the sets and costumes are period perfect, and out of nowhere a cowboy or a gladiator or a Revolutionary War hero, about to fuck, suddenly has a rubber covering his cock. I'm popped right out of the moment. And by the moment, I mean the fantasy.

Do I believe porn stars should risk their lives just so I can more fully enjoy pleasuring myself? No, of course not. But I also know that the workers in the sex industry are tested quite regularly and openly share the results with each other. The number of HIV cases in straight porn (where condoms are now rarely used) are historically quite limited. Sure, it occurs occasionally, but it's extraordinarily rare.

So, there it is. I want nasty porn. I like to see the cock sticking in -- whatever it's sticking in -- bare and natural. And the cum in the mouth, I like that too. Okay, maybe it's a kink, but it's my kink, something I'm really into. And as long as no one is getting hurt, I'm going to keep jacking-off to it.

Last Night's Pro Am

2005-11-04T20:47:00.000-08:00

I found one I liked!!!!! In an earlier posting I mentioned I wanted to find amateur straight porn featuring amateur guys instead of the standard porn stars. I watched a video last night that fullfilled all my expectations. It's called Military Sex Maneuvers from The Body Shoppe Productions. It features hot straight marines, navy boys and army grunts having sex with (not very attractive) young ladies.

A couple of the guys seemed a little uncomfortable being filmed having sex, but most of them go for it with unbridled passion. A majority of the scenes include more than one guy (some scenes feature up to four or five guys on one woman.) For some reason military guys are comfortable being naked with hard-ons, fucking in front of each other. They even happily watch each other shoot big loads of hot, salty cum, and then high-five.

Obviously, this is all produced with a gay male audience in mind, and that's just fine with me. I'm just thrilled to have found it. I'll be looking for more of these videos, I promise you.

A Scary Wack

2005-10-31T21:51:00.000-08:00

Last night, to celebrate Halloween, I watched a flick I hardly ever pull out of my vast collection. It's a Dirk Yates directed All Worlds gay video called Men For All Seasons, and no, it isn't about Sir Thomas Beckett. It's a seasonally themed J/O film with five scenes. The first is a marine stroking beside a Christmas tree, then a hot blonde boy wacking on top of a collection of Valentines. We see a hot brunette doing some gardening and then pulling one off, next move to a hairy surfer catching a few waves and ultimately getting off in an out-door shower.

The final scene features my personal favorite porn stud Axel Garret in the strangest of all the scenes. This is the segment I watched last night to celebrate the holiday. In a secluded area, Axel drives up in his truck, the bed of which is loaded with pumpkins. He begins to unload the pumpkins and as he does, takes his shirt off. He soon becomes bored and jumps up on the tailgate and leans back against the pumpkins.

Well, one thing leads to another and soon he's opening his tight jeans and starting to jack-off. He pulls his pants down around his knees and climbs up further up on the pumpkins.

He works his large blonde dick, really polishing his prick, at one point licking his fingers and smearing the saliva all over his mushroom cock head. Soon the pants come off and he really strokes hard. But then, suddenly, he gets an idea and pulls his jack-knife (appropriately) out of his shirt pocket.

Axel cuts a round hole in one of the pumpkins and then -- I swear to God -- he fucks the gourd. We see him humping away, his cock plunging in and out of the pumpkin, his blonde pubes getting sticky. And we see his cock stabbing in and out of the orange jack-o-lantern from the inside. Finally, Axel throws down the pumpkin and cums all over himself.

It's a nice scene, but I think it must be one of Axel's first movies. The blonde hunk looks very young, he hasn't figured out yet that he has to look "into it" when the camera is on his face, and when he cums, the director holds the frame in a close-up of that huge cock. Well, Axel is a prodigious shooter, and so we miss where most of the jizz flies and falls.

But even so, it's a pretty good film. I try and watch it every Halloween. And because Axel is my favorite, while watching it he becomes both a Trick and a Treat.

Str8 Pro Am

2005-10-30T13:22:00.000-08:00

Ok, we all know I'm gay, so when I watch straight porn I'm looking at the guys, not the ladies. That's no surprise to anyone. I like straight porn-studs, and I like them because they're hot, handsome, sexual, masculine, and -- well -- straight. And we all know I like gay amateur porn, because of the guys are often straight, sexy, masculine and -- most importantly -- new. I haven't seen them before, I haven't stroked off to them before, and I really like that. And, yes, I jacked-off to another hot Sean Cody boy last night.

I recently rented a couple of DVDs of straight amateur porn, and -- Boy Howdy! -- is it disappointing. The reason? The woman in this sub-genre are amateurs, brand new, never before seen. The men however are the same old faces and cocks we've seen for years. Nothing wrong with these guys, just not what I expected. When I rent amateur porn, I really don't want to see Eric Everhard or Julian Rivers or Billy Glide or Tom Byron. And I especially don't want to see Ron Jeremy (Remember when Ron first appeared on the porn scene? He was young and hot and hairy and hung. Now, he's just disgusting.)

So the question; where can you find hot straight amateur porn, where both the men and the women are new-comers? Because that's what I want to jack-off to.

The Natural Habitat of the Northwest Porn Pig

2005-10-28T11:40:00.000-07:00

I had dinner the other night with a couple friends, and a guy I had never met before (but he's hotter than hell and so I hope to see a lot more of him.) I've known the two guys for several years, but we are not close friends, we hang out when we can, about twice a year. As you might expect, considering it was a table of four gay men, the topic of conversation got around to stroke movies. By way of introduction to the new guy, I was presented as -- and I quote -- "a porn connoisseur."

I thought, Jesus, its not just my best friends any more, the even larger circle of acquaintances know about my "fixation." Is that good or bad? Okay, so I have like 300 video tapes and am now working on my DVD collection. Sure, I porn-surf the web for a couple hours a night. I know it's not common to masturbate almost every day of your life. But I'm still a productive member of society. I stay at the top of my profession in my city, and in a competitive, stressful industry. I volunteer my time to a number of worthy charities. I spend quality time with quite a few people, tending and nurturing many friendships. I have three God-Children I'm devoted to. And I'm politically active and involved.

Okay, maybe I'm being a little defensive. I don't mean to be, I don't feel that way. I was terribly amused by the conversation at the restaurant, and it somehow garnered me instant respect from the new guy. And, of course, I'm not alone, everyone at the table started talking about their favorite porn stars, and the newest DVDs each had rented or bought. I guess I'm just more vocal about my love of porn than most. And that's why I'm the one they all come to when they want to borrow some wacking material. We all have to be identified by something. I'm just known as the guy with the weak eyes and hairy palms.

Last Night: Taboo II

2005-10-27T12:20:00.000-07:00

For my evening pull last night I watched the second half of the 1982 straight classic Taboo II, produced by Kirdy Stevens. The sequel to the wildly popular and original Taboo, part two continues the story of a family caught up in incest. As I mentioned in earlier posts, I like my porn to have a naughty feeling, and the Taboo series explores incest in a very naughty way (which, needless to say, it already is.)

The film stars Kay Parker, Eric Edwards, Dorothy LeMay, Honey Wilder, Ron Jeremy (in a cameo at the orgy), and in the leading role, one of my favorites, Kevin James.

The sex is hot and there's an orgy near the end that is just fantastic. I love orgy sequences if they're well filmed (I have to know who's doing what to whom, it can't just be anonymous body parts flailing around), and the orgies in all the Taboo flicks are very well filmed.

The series continues to be produced today, I believe, but it's gotten cheap, thrown-together and stupid. If you're interested in straight hot incest stories, go with the original starring Parker and the amazing Mike Ranger, part two (as I did last night), or the third part featuring Jerry Butler and Blake Palmer, again with Parker and Wilder. If you go as far as part four, it's alright, but just alright. There is no orgy sequence (which the first three all offer) and it's beginning to get a little tepid. Kevin James makes a return, joined by Wilder and Ginger Lynn. Jamie Gillis, John Leslie and Francois Papillon also pop up. But any installment of the series after four, forget it. They become almost unwatchable.

Those first three though, and a good deal of part four, is classic, nasty straight 80s adult cinema. If you love great wack flicks, this is must see porn.

Sean & Wes

2005-10-26T16:30:00.000-07:00

Lets talk about Sean Cody.

As I wrote earlier, I don't subscribe to pay porn sites, but if I were going to, the first one would be straight boy amateur site SeanCody.com. I think it's the hottest of all the "let's film some hot straight amateur guys" websites. A friend joined and downloaded some movies, which he shared with me. I love them, they're hotter than shit, and I watch them often. That's what I polished my prick to last night before bed.

Sean finds hot straight guys and gets them to do the most amazing things. And they don't even appear to be drunk. They tell about their sex lives, they jack-off, they let Sean's gay friends blow-them, they participate in circle-jerks, sometimes they'll even let a guy fuck them.

They do this, needless to say, for money. But, come on, there has to be some desire more prevalent then just the need for a little extra spending money. And besides, most of these guys don't look like they're starving. They're intelligent and articulate, they wear trendy, expensive clothes, and obviously have memberships to gyms. They're mostly young muscle studs who seem to know what they're doing when it come to posing and showing off the work they've been doing on their bodies.

Take Wes, the guy in the picture above. He did a solo for Sean, and then came back for his first blow-job from a man. That's the sequence I watched last night. Wes has a tight, tattooed torso (and tattoos usually do nothing for me), short cropped blonde hair, a huge cock and really nasty (in a very good way) low-hangers. The guy that blows him, boy-next-door type Grady, never takes his clothes off or even opens his fly, though in one shot you can see quite a stiff lump in his basket. They start with Grady massaging Wes. They're both dressed, Wes wearing jeans and a tight muscle shirt. The straight stud is obviously watching porn, though you never see what his eyes are glued to. After a couple minutes of this casual shoulder rub, Grady helps Wes out of his shirt, lightly feeling the amazing chest and nipples.

Grady even tastes one of those hot nips, before opening Wes' pants and pulling them off. You can plainly see through Wes' boxers the outline of the engorged mushroom head of his already hard cock, and when Grady pulls the shorts off, Wes is more than ready to go. And so for the next fifteen or twenty minutes every part of Wes between his stomach and his knees becomes spit slathered by Grady's hungry mouth and tongue. The cock is sucked in numerous positions, and the low hangers are treated with stunning attention and precision.

One of the most exciting parts of any Sean Cody film where man-on-man action happens, of course, is when these straight guys get rimmed for the first time. Women just aren't very interested in that activity, but we gay men love receiving it and love doing it (I know I do). Wes is surprised when Grady's tongue first finds its way up his ass-hole, but he sure as hell doesn't complain. Grady is a Grade-A (get it?) salad-tosser, and comes up with several innovative positions, allowing Wes the ultimate rimming experience while allowing us the ultimate view. Outstanding!

The scene ends with Grady lying on the bed, Wes sitting on his chest, jerking-off and blowing an amazingly large load onto the still clothed stud's face. The jizz drips down his cheeks, covers his chin, pools in his eyes, and, yes, some shoots into his open mouth. And, yes, Grady swallows it and then puts Wes' cock back in his mouth to clean it off.

And that's just one of Sean Cody's many movies. He must have nearly two hundred at his site. If, like me, you're cheap and don't want to pay the money, SeanCody.com is terrific because there is a ton of free pictures for each model (like the ones above.) Check it out at http://www.seancody.com/page.php?frame=home

And let me know what you think of the site. I'd love to hear from you.

The Plot Thickens

2005-10-25T17:12:00.000-07:00

I've been thinking about my Titles post and exploring why I like older stroke-flicks better than newer ones. I watch a lot of amateur porn, both straight and gay, and I like it a lot. I have to admit though, I really love porn movies with strong plots, and as films have come to be more and more shot on video, plots generally seem to have disappeared.

Yes, there are occasional wackers today with plots, but they're getting harder and harder to find, especially in straight porn. It's so easy to throw two or three people in a room or by a pool or under a tree or in the back seat of a moderately sized car and have them go at it. Even the scant situational set-up is becoming extinct, like the Hot Young Pizza Boy knocking on the Nearly Naked Older Lady's door and inquiring, "Did you order the sausage?" Scenes begin now with everybody naked, hard, wet, and fucking.

Now, the level of acting in porn is a topic for an entirely different post, and maybe producers decided to do away with story lines because, let's face it, these actors aren't exactly Kevin Spacey or Dame Judi Dench. Sure, they all know who Ron Jeremy is, but few of them have ever even heard of Stanislavski.

And there certainly were plotless porn flicks shot on 35mm, but they were very rare. Movies today are meant to be purchased, taken home and watched over three or four sessions, so there are three or four points in those films intended to get you off. Pre-VCR movies wanted to keep you sitting (and stroking) in your theatre seat for the duration of the running time, and so the sexual situations were doled out in a slower progression.

Aye, there's the rub! I find that slower untangling of the story sexier. I like the fact that in pre-1985 movies the two featured protagonists would meet and there would be sexual tension, but, at that first meeting, that's all it was, a first meeting. Later they would get together, and after some necking and feeling each other up, maybe undress slowly; we see her seductively playing with her still bra covered nipples, we see him with a hard-on in his underwear. That hard-on is then slowly exposed, flipping up out of his shorts, a droplet of pre-cum flying onto her face. Then a blow-job, a pussy licking and ... he cums! They didn't necessarily fuck in that scene, that was saved for another upcoming segment.

That's hot to me. That's hotter to me than the couple instantly naked and fucking in the first scene, and, an even greater crime in my opinion, doing the same routine of sex acts in exactly the same order as everyone else in every other scene of the film. Like comedy, eroticism depends on surprise, and if I know what's going to happen before it happens, well, that's not sexy (or funny).

So I often go back to the classic porn films of my youth, both straight and gay, many of which, thankfully, have been preserved on DVD. The performers are hotter, it's easier to project myself into the situation, and the sex somehow just seems naughtier. Come to think of it, maybe I'm really projecting myself back to when I just turned 18 and started going to "Dirty Movies" in Seattle. There were three or four adult theatres in the downtown area then, and I hit them all. It did seem naughty; I was afraid of running into someone I knew, there was a thrill to it, and I would literally tremble. Paying your money at a box-office, walking in and your eyes slowly adjusting to that large dark space, lighted only by projected people fucking -- really fucking -- on the screen. And you never knew who was sitting near you in the dark, watching, masturbating. You just knew you were one of them, and you felt like you were getting away with something. And you were.

Hairy Guys & You

2005-10-23T21:15:00.001-07:00

I mentioned in an earlier post that I'm the Moderator of a MSN group called HairyMales. Okay, so you're probably guessing by now I like hairy guys. Well, it's true.

And this afternoon I Net-Stroked to one of my favorite free sites Hair Trigger http://group.freegayspace.com/hairtrigger/contents/ht1.html There's a picture below from the series that got me off today.

If you're into hairy and muscular guys, this site can't be beat (although you won't be able to stop yourself from beating!) There are hundreds of large format photos, far too many, I promise, to view on one visit. Check it out, you'll go back often, I promise. I do.

Pay Sites & Previews

2005-10-22T20:44:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed a marathon Web-Porning session last night, surfing for several hours, going to old stand-by sites as well discovering a few new ones. They were all either free sites, or the preview pages of pay sites. I don't subscribe to any pay sites because A) I'm cheap, and B) What they offer just isn't worth the money when there is so much free porn on the web. Why should I pay fifteen or twenty five or even thirty five bucks a month to see a very specific type of porn I may tire of very quickly?

Besides, once you join the Yahoo and MSN and Google adult groups, you have tons of pictures and video clips delivered daily right into your email inbox. So, why pay for porn that may end up boring you when there are more free sites than you could ever jack-off to?

That Which We Call "Porn" By Any Other Name

2005-10-21T12:10:00.000-07:00

I don't mean this post to sound bitter at all, but if you follow this blog you know I prefer older porn movies to the newer videos. There are a lot of reasons why, but one of the lesser of those reasons is the titles these newer films carry. This is a much lesser reason why the newer ones aren't as entertaining for me, but still irksome.

Twenty years ago the title of a porn movie was going to be displayed on a marquee in the middle of downtown, and so that title had to be suggestive without being dirty. Both gay and straight porn had provocative titles, sure, but not just filthy for the sake of being filthy. They had titles you could read something nasty into if you wanted, but they didn't hit you over the head. Think of those movies you loved like Taboo, I Do, Deep Throat, I Like to Watch, Screen Play, Dirty Angels, Frat House Memories, Wet Afternoon, Playing With Fire, Deep Inside Jennifer Welles, Lollipop Palace, Pacific Coast Highway, Little French Maid. The list goes on and on.

But now what kind of titles do we get, now that films go straight to video stores where children and the prudish aren't allowed? Look at today's titles; Fuck Sluts, Cunt Hunt, Cock Whores, Cum Splatter, Hairy Men Who Take It In The Ass, Spunk Guzzlers. And then there are the Oscar worthy film take-off titles: Shaving Ryan's Privates, Sticky Business, Romancing The Bone, Jer's Ass-Kick Park, Mad Matt's Beyond Thunder-Cock.

I'm not offended by these titles, I feel they lack class, grace and subtlety. The earlier titles were slightly more intellectual, giving you an idea of what the film was about, and that said film was nasty, without the title being nasty itself. They were often clever and well thought out, not an idea someone had dead drunk at a party and pasted onto the next video that was finished.

And maybe that's my real complaint; when porn was shot on film, care was taken with the productions. They had to worry about lighting and the script and camera angles and continuity. A lot of today's shot-on-video porn feels thrown together and careless.

I wish we could get back to the good old titles. Leave vulgarities and puns to those of us who write these blogs.

Gay & Str8 Wank

2005-10-20T12:58:00.000-07:00

Last night I jacked off to two vids, one gay and one straight, one new and one old favorite.

My roommate got the DVD of a Jocks Video called Good as Gold, starring the adorably sexy, and very muscular Matthew Rush. It's okay, the guys are buff, hot and hung, but the sex is tragically predictable. Every scene, whether its a two way or a three way, contains exactly the same combination over and over; A sucks B, B sucks A, one rims the other, one tops the other in A) the missionary position, B) doggy, C) spooning, then they jerk-off until they shoot on their own belly. The only exception is a terrific bathhouse orgy scene with about 10 guys, but even that doesn't have the variety one would hope for. It does conclude with one guy having every one of the others shoot load after load all over him before he pulls one off himself.

The straight flick was an old tape of mine called Horny Holidaze (bad title, great film.) It's a European production with no stars I can name. It does feature one guy I find irresistible, and this is the only vid I've ever found him in. He has long blonde hair, a stunning, huge cock, and an ass you just want to bury your face in. He has a three-way scene in a bathroom with two women after he catches them doing each other and then falls into the bathtub. They have to get him out of those wet clothes! After his big cock is double sucked and he has eaten their pussys, he fucks both of them. One soon leaves to take care of another guy waiting in the livingroom. Our blonde hero fucks the other chick shooting all over her, then they join their friends in the front room. Then a third couple shows up, the man of which is dressed (I kid you not) as Father Christmas. They fuck in every possible (straight) combination, finishing with lots of hot cum dripping everywhere. As they are decompressing, a very unfortunate drag queen shows up (A Fellini moment if ever there was one) and chases the naked guys around the room, everyone laughing wildly, long, flacid cocks bouncing and swaying.

I love it, and it got me off explosively last night.

Amateur Fascination

2005-10-20T11:30:00.000-07:00

Why do I find the new(ish) wave of amateur "straight guy" porn so hot? I don't know, maybe its because the guys are real, and most are presented as completely straight. As I mentioned in an earlier post, I discovered my favorite porn star, Axel Garret, in an amateur film. When Dirk Yates started producing his The Few, The Proud, The Naked series of hot, straight marines for All Worlds (of which I own several additions), he was pretty much the only one doing it. Maybe what's most surprising is he's still doing it. Along the way he morphed these exibitionist marines into a whole generation of new porn stars, turning out not just Axel, but Rod Barry, among many others.

Dirk started his series 15, maybe 20 years ago, before the internet was omnipresent. Now the amateur straight men are everywhere; Sean Cody, Hung Male Amateurs, Sharpshooters Video, Corbin Fisher, Amateur Straight Guys, Circle Jerk Boys, Straight Guys for Queer Eyes. And that's just a few of the websites and video studios (Sorry if I left out your favorite).

These amateur films can be kind of a mixed bag. You never know if the next guy is going to be jaw-droppingly handsome or your worst nightmare -- you know the type, the guy that looked, well, alright when you were drunk in the dim bar, but then you get him home and into the light and -- Yikes!

A friend gave me one of the many videos produced by Auntie Bob. http://auntiebob.com/ The title is Auntie Bob #17, and I rubbed one off to it yesterday afternoon. Of the four sequences, I find two stunningly hot and two duller than shit (there's that mixed bag).

The dull episodes feature obviously gay, un-buff (anti-buff?), uninteresting guys, which usually is at least fine. But in these kinds of videos I want to see muscular straight boys doing naughty things they know they shouldn't be doing. Tayler is an uninteresting twink jerking-off, the kind of thing you can see in any gay bar backroom or truckstop men's room. The other sequence features two flabby twinks, Mike and Jason, who do each other, something you can see in any bathhouse. Whatever. This may be your thing, and if it is go for it, but frankly it does nothing for me.

But the first and fourth episodes are so erotic they make up for any deficiencies in the rest of the film. In Part One we get to know a horny paratrooper named Mitch. He has a very hairy chest, as well as hairy pubes, cock, balls and ass. He wears an open baseball jersey and black jock strap pulled to the side so his cock stands out as he jacks-off. He is very vocal, moaning and talking dirty. Cameraman Auntie Bob helps him out, pinching his nipples, squeezing his balls, rubbing his pubes. Mitch shoots a load, then he and Bob chat for a while, Mitch's cock returns to full salute and he starts stroking again. Bob jumps in to help once more, this time sticking his fingers into Mitch's hairy asshole until he cums again. So fuckin' hot!

But the hottest sequence is the final one. TJ is a young guy who has come over to Auntie Bob's apartment to make a little extra spending money while his girl friend is away. Bob feels him up, opens his pants and produces an amazingly large, thick, hairy cock. After Bob strokes him a little, TJ jacks himself, then takes the camera and we see Bob suck TJ from the young man's point of view. Bob puts the camera on a tripod and bestows on TJ the blow-job of his life. This hot stud writhes, moans, screams, and then cums in Bob's mouth and all over his face and beard. It's an instant power climax for me.

So, I guess that explains what I find so hot about amateur porn. I like straight guys who give it up for easy cash. Now, some videos and websites just have the guys jacking-off and no one ever touches them, as opposed to what Auntie Bob gets away with. Some web sites talk the guys into having sex with each other (Sean Cody is big on this), and I find that really hot as well. I think its because these straight boys look so damn uncomfortable jacking, sucking, fucking, and frankly, just being naked and hard around each other. That's fun, somehow.

Some sites have the guys fuck women, usually in a gang bang situation, but are filmed for a gay audience focusing on the guy, and I like that a lot as well. But that's for another post.

I hope the amateur movement continues. I like it. It's hot, because the guys are always brand new, not the same old faces over and over, and they seem somehow obtainable even though they're straight. Amateur porn is one of my first choices when it comes time to pick porn for the night, or when I'm surfing on the pornagraph. Now all I wonder is, where are the guys in my neighborhood who will do this?

Money Shots

2005-10-18T12:34:00.000-07:00

Not only do I watch porn, I share porn. I'm the moderator of a club at MSN called HairyMales http://groups.msn.com/HairyMales. I got a question from Matt, a club member, I thought might be interesting to discuss here as well.

Matt asked, What do you think of the "money shot"? For me watching, I want to see him cum inside his/her body. You can always tell when a guy is climaxing because of the actions. But when he pulls out for the "money shot," the viewer misses the reactions and facial expressions of the partner.

Well, honestly, Matt and everyone, I love the money shot. I love seeing the cum covering someone, particularity on the face or in the mouth. I suppose I like it because you know the sex is real. I always feel kind of cheated when a guy shoots his wad of goo inside, invisible to the viewer, even if you are shown a cream-pie afterwards so you know it really happened. I just think that final squirt is one of the sexiest things there is, whether it's on film or right in front of my face.

I know this kind of activity isn't "Safe Sex," which is something I always practice in my sex life. But, one must ask, are these films intended as realistic depictions of life or are they sexual fantasies? Aren't they intended to play into our secret desires; those things we'd all like to do but don't dare because we're afraid, or because society would ostracize us, or because our lover would walk out on us, or because we'd feel dirty afterwards? (That sentence was very long. I may be turning into George Bernard Shaw or William Faulkner.)

But I agree with Matt, I love seeing the face contort at the moment of climax. That's one of the reasons I love older porn, the stuff actually shot on film (But that topic is a whole other post). You always saw the "sex-face" as well as the cum shot in those films. I love both those things, and hate missing either one, and the combination is hotter than anything.

Your Name Is Axel?

2005-10-17T22:27:00.000-07:00

A lot of folks ask me if Axel is my real name. It sounds like a porn name, I hear a lot. Well, yeah, I guess it does. That's because it isn't my real name -- it's my slutting around on the web name. And where did I come up with the name Axel? Well, from a porn star, as you probably guessed!

If you've been around gay porn at all during the last decade, you've heard of Axel Garret, one of the biggest stars to come out of Dirk Yates' All Worlds Studios. Almost fifteen years ago, he was a marine who needed a little extra cash. He started out doing jack-off vids, then graduated to jacking-off with other guys, then to hard core gay and bi porn, but only ever appearing as Trade.

He says he is completely straight, and he much prefers the bi-sexual films he's made to the gay ones. He's been in two bi films, Family Affair, an incest drama that's hotter than it sounds, and a Western, Miss Kitty's Litter (Yeah, that's really the title ... but the film is hotter than fuck.) His Dirk Yates jack-off flicks are stunningly sexy (he cums massive amounts, and shoots great distances -- truly impressive), the best being A Day in the Life of Axel Garret. Outstanding fuck films include Kiss Off (maybe the best gay porn film I've ever seen), Trade Off (with Ryan Idol), How the West Was Hung, and Reflections 2.

Retired for a few years, he made a come back (cum back?) a couple years ago, doing a jack-off sequence in a vid titled Where Are They Now? That's what I watched last night, and I never tire of his scene. He's gotten a little older, the blonde hair is receding very slightly, but he is still buff as shit, or buffer (he tells us in the film he works as a construction worker in North Idaho), and still has a hairy cock, terrific fuzz all over his amazing ass, and a smile that would melt the heart of the most cynical drag queen. There's a moment in the film when Axel is sitting in an arm chair, naked, jacking-off, casually chatting, when Dirk asks him to stand up. He does, and his cock is at full attention. He turns around slowly, and it is one of the most spectacular sights I've ever had the pleasure to see. So stunningly hot!

There are so many things that make this stud my favorite porn star, including all the above. And did I mention his huge cock that never seems to go soft? If I want to get off in a hurry, all I have to do is put on one of Axel's films, and I'll cum within a few minutes (that's unusual for me ... I'm kind of a long distance runner most of the time. In fact, sometimes that's a problem during sex. I can go almost all night, and a lot of guys just can't keep up ... slackers!)

And so, a few years ago, looking for a web name, the natural place to go was my favorite porn-stud, Axel Garret. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

Would You Do Porn?

2005-10-17T13:01:00.000-07:00

I was talking with a friend last night, hot young bi twink guy, 25 but looks 18 or less, and he was telling me how much he'd like to be a porn star. He says he doesn't care if it's with men or women, if he is fucking or being fucked, he'd like to do it for the fun and a little extra spending money (he's a student at a local University.)

It made me start thinking. There isn't much of a question whether I would ever be asked to appear in porn, even though I think it'd be fun to do. I would consider writing it, or directing it, certainly. But what psychological make up does it take to actively want to star in sex movies? Now don't get me wrong, I don't think there is anything wrong with those who want to do it, I applaud them. They have confidence in their sexuality, their bodies, their looks. In a perfect world, everyone would feel that good about themselves, no matter how they looked. As I mentioned in my last post, European sex stars are very comfortable in this way, and God bless them. But in America today? I think my buddy is very brave. So maybe I'll take some pictures of him and we'll see what we can do with them, sell them, put them on the web, whatever. That could be a lot of fun.

So how about you? Would you fuck on film for cash? Is it in your make-up? Would you be willing to do that? Have you ever done that? Humm. I'd love to hear from those of you who have.

Devil in the Flesh & Euro Porn

2005-10-16T13:15:00.000-07:00

Last night, after a looong evening of Porning on the web, before I went to bed, I pulled one off to a favorite scene from a vid called Devil in The Flesh from Private Studios. The scene features two of the hottest Euro-Studs; Frank Major and Nick Lang.

While being painted by a sexy female artist, Nick and his slave woman play with each other. Although fully clothed, he makes her lick a whip and then suck the handle while she feels his basket (he is wearing tight black pants and sitting with his legs wide open.) Frank comes into watch and Nick sends the slave over to give him a drink, feel his dick up, and then lick his chest, suck his huge cock, and fuck him. Nick joins in for a three-way, some DP, and finally, as is always the case in Private productions, a messy facial. The woman artist only watches very uncomfortably.

So, what's the deal with porn from Europe? Why do I find it so much hotter? Well, the Private stuff is stunningly well produced; high production standards, terrific lighting and camera work, gorgeous men and women, interesting stories (something I really like), fairly acceptable acting, and very hot sex. The guys aren't like American porn stars, Europeans aren't afraid to touch each other, fuck together, perform gang-bangs and be right next to the other guy, rubbing up against him. That's hot, knowing (or guessing) they're completely straight, but I think there's more to it. There is an openness to the Euro-Studs, sex isn't something unmentionable or nasty. It's fun, it's something to share and they don't seem embarrassed or ashamed by it. Sure, there are some USA film-fuckers who are that way, but they seem harder to find.

Another thing I find very hot about Euro-Studs is they don't all look alike. Some are hairy (kind of a fetish of mine), some are smooth, some are young, some are older, some are buff, some are ... well, less buff but still awfully damn fine, and all of them are at least fairly good looking, if not jaw-droppingly handsome in a movie star kind of way.

Euro porn is short on Woman-on-Woman action (which, as a gay man, I find dull), and very big on orgies and oral cum-shots, both of which I think are very, very hot.

My two cents? I think Devil in the Flesh is one of the best European porn flicks I've seen. I would very highly recommend it. It got me off in a hurry last night.

What I'm Into & Reading

2005-10-15T23:55:00.000-07:00

I serf porn on the web almost every day, and when something comes along on the web (or as we call the computer in my neighborhood -- "The Pornagraph") I'll be talking about that as well as my DVD/VCR watching.

Along the same lines, I'm reading a very interesting book right now about the straight porn biz titled The Other Hollywood; The Uncensored Oral History of the Porn Industry by Legs McNeil & Jennifer Osbourne. It isn't quite what I'd hoped it would be, it features a lot of the seeder side of the business (the MIPORN sting, the Wonderland murders, etc) as opposed to how porn evolved over the years, which is what I was most interested in. But I'm only about two thirds of the way through, so when I've finished reading it, I'll give the full review.

Anyone else been reading anything they'd like to talk about?

Watching Porn

2005-10-15T16:04:00.000-07:00

Ok, I have to admit it, I watch a lot of porn. And I own a lot of porn. Straight, Bi, Gay, Fetish, Solo, Orgy, Classic, Brand New -- I love it all. Is it a collection or an obsession? Am I addicted to jacking-off to others having sex? Maybe, but that's not the focus of this blog. I thought it might be fun to record my thoughts about the porn of today, yesterday and tomorrow, in addition to what I watch when I watch it.

And, of course, I'd love to hear from others who enjoy porn as much as I do.